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URL:  http://boards.fool.com/ishtar-im-going-to-be-really-direct-here-please-17079800.aspx

Subject:  Re: OT: single parent dilemma Date:  4/17/2002  6:49 PM
Author:  fromagetorte Number:  123036 of 308441

Ishtar,

I'm going to be really direct here. Please don't take it as a criticism, because it's truly not meant as one.

I don't think you were arrogant for telling him you'd take care of her and that you didn't want anything from him. I think you were taking responsibility for a decision you made. He hasn't stepped up to the plate.

My opinion? Stop sending the pictures. Stop being the one to make the effort. In the event he ever grows up, which isn't very likely, and decides that he wants to be a part of her life, his claim "she kept me from my kid" won't hold a lot of water considering he's never made any sort of effort to be a part of her life. Any family court judge worth anything will ask what he's done thus far. He won't have much of a claim.

You rock as a single mom. You've cared for her, kept her safe, been a great role model. Telling him he hurts you may be good for you, but I wouldn't expect him to read it and turn over a new leaf. If the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior, you're going to get more of the same. Why expose yourself to more of his nonsense?

Move on with your life and put him in the past where he belongs. He wants to be a part of things? Well, actions speak louder than words.

gena
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