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Subject:  Re: Difficulties with Intercourse Date:  8/4/2003  12:46 AM
Author:  MichaelRead Number:  913 of 2283

Meagan, as an interloper on this board may I share my thoughts? Consider what you've accomplished in the past six years just by yourselves. For that reason don't do what is false to you: booze, swinging, oral sex, whatever, set that aside. In this, if it doesn't feel right to you, don't. An answer rarely is in the area you find additional fear or pain.

I think why you have made progress is because you and DH have established your own pattern. This is acceptable to us and although it doesn't match something in a book or other people's experiences it is our own. Sure, there's much that can be learned from other's experiences yet often they set a pattern that is, frankly, onerous.

Find out more about what you and he like. Which means experiment yet if you don't like a particular action then don't do it again. If you like something then let him know that's nice. Maybe, just maybe, you haven't found a position that meets all of your needs and his.

With him on his side and you on your back with one leg over his waist and one of his between yours may not seem as 'intimate' as other positions yet the distance created by this position may offset the feeling of over stimulation. Elly and I like this position because we can stay in it and, often, fall asleep in it. Also, this position allows for either slight or deep penetration depending on what's 'right' for then. Additionally, in this position I can maintain an erection longer even after ejaculation. Am I really writing this?

The problem with the missionary position is that, frankly, you have to get off (and by that I mean.. oh, never mind). Then, bar cuddling, it's over. Nothing wrong with cuddling, I like that verrrrrry much, yet the genital connection is lost and 'sex' is over. To me sex is not intercourse, it's being closerthanthis with someone I love dearly.

My mother is not going to read this but Elly will and when you do, hon, remember I am 'sharing' not 'telling'.


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