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Subject:  Re: Difficulties with Intercourse Date:  8/12/2003  12:48 PM
Author:  GardenStateFool Number:  945 of 2283

Look, if I sounded like I was judging or insulting you, I didn't mean it that way. I really think that you should see a doctor. If you think I'm wrong and/or don't want to, that's your prerogative.

From earlier in the thread, NaggingFool said:

I have talked to my physician (at one point I had a resident for my PCP and she spent over an hour talking to me about this problem.)

In addition, it's obvious that she's done reading on the subject: Passionate Marriage: Love, Sex, and Intimacy in Emotionally Committed Relationships, by David Schnarch (suggested by TeacherH, which NaggingFool provided a very good synopsis of).

So, since she is exploring both avenues already, your advice was both a little late and redundant. In addition, it made a pretty obvious value judgement - which we try to avoid or at least phrase a little more politely than you did.

In addition, forgive my cynicism, but it's a little hard to take advice from someone who says things like this:

which reads, on the topic of NaggingFool's post:

No, I mocked her and got demonized for it.


So, it's a little hard to swallow when you tell someone that you're not judging or insulting them, when, in my experience with you, you manage to make a career out of doing just that. Did you mean to say that you were mocking her, or is that just out of context?

Personally, I don't really care if you want to post on this board or not. It's a board that welcomes advice from all viewpoints, and is full of people who genuinely have an issue they want to resolve. Myself included.

But the atmosphere is supposed to be supportive and/or relatively fact-based and objective, and for the most part, informed, by people who are either offering anecdotal advice from the view of similar experience, or know more about a particular topic than someone else does. Unlike many other boards, it's not really a debate-type of atmosphere. It's information-sharing.

I probably should just let this go, but it's really hard, especially when you have referred to me as an "oh-so-evolved Infertile Mommy Wannabe."

If you've got such a deep level of contempt on the subject, it makes me wonder what the character of any advice you DO provide is going to be.

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