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Subject:  Re: My daughter wants to give $ to street panhan Date:  9/3/2003  6:26 PM
Author:  stellla Number:  12286 of 42475

My daughter told me yesterday that she wants to give her charity money to a man who stands on a corner near her school. I made noncommittal noises, thinking, "What do I say?!?"

Well, I don't have kids myself, but several of my friends do :-)

I agree with the other posters that it's a great to let your daughter know your concerns. Great time to talk about the fact there are risks associated with risk opening up, be it financially or emotionally. I think each person has to decide if they are more concerned with never looking foolish or being taken advantage of, or willing to sometimes be hurt or taken advantage of but more often do good.

You could explain how you choose the nonprofits you donate to. Heck, showing how you analyze their Annual Report and analyze where the donated dollars go could be a first step to reading financial reports and investing!

In addition, letting her know your concerns has got to help build self esteem. You're treating her with respect and empowering her to make decisions and learn from them.

However, I also think you should talk about charity being more than giving dollars, or even research. Talk about volunteering time or services. See what ideas she has. Why does she want to help this man? He looks like he needs better clothes? Take him clothes and or shopping. He look hungry? Help her make him food to take him, talk to her about what food considerations you'd have for someone that was homeless. She curious about his life, see about letting her talk to him, hearing his story.

Who knows, maybe she'll decide she likes the idea of volunteering somewhere. Something independent of this or the money she saves to donate. Course, then you get to volunteer too :-)

Also, might ask her what she expects to get from donating money. What are her expectations? Would she be upset if she saw guy with bottle of booze? Would she be upset if she gives him money and never has any idea what happened to it?
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