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Subject:  It's ok. I like talking to myself Date:  1/29/2007  12:46 PM
Author:  epona4 Number:  109 of 317


Came here trying to learn more about ADHD. I came to the realization last week that I just might be undiagnosed ADD.

I'd been doing some heavy reading on the web and was getting very, VERY excited because, d@mn did this sound like me. Then I got distracted by family issues and had to let it drop for a few days. This weekend dh and I went to the library and I looked up books on Adult and teen ADD. I decided to NOT take every last book they had on the subject. I left 3 on the shelf. I didn't want to seem compulsive or anything.

So far what I have been reading has made me "happy". So much of it sounds like ME. Not every single symptom...but most. And now, I know I need to make an appointment with a professional to get tested and go from there. But I'm scared. I'm worried they will say "No, you don't have this." But, in my heart I am pretty darn sure that I do. I've been trying to "fix" my depression for years, but now I'm thinking that "Gee, maybe we're trying to fix the wrong thing!"

Also, my family history makes me think I'm on the right track here. Nobody was ever diagnosed with ADD in my family, but I'm sure my dad is. Won't hold onto a job for much more than a year or two, big dreamer, major cut-up (don't know enough about his childhood though)He really preformed his best in the military. Maybe because it "organized" his life? Everything was laid out in black and white.

And then there is my aunt on my moms side. Hyperactive. Must always be doing something. When she was a kid she would throw complete tantrums. Actually put her fist through a glass door when she was a little girl.

And my son. Smart. Amazingly smart. Won't do his homework. Or if he does he looses it. Always has to be tapping his feet, drumming his fingers, making some kind of noise. When he was 2 thru about 5 there were times when he would throw a complete fit and dh and I would take turns just holding him still. I remember holding him one night for 2 hours while he screamed and fought me to get free. But when I asked teachers and the ped about it they would say "No. I've had to deal with ADD kids and he's not one." And I have a friend who has 2 ADHD boys. They are both pretty serious. So I kept comparing DS to them and not thinking that "Gee maybe there are degrees of ADD." And then feeling guilty for even thinking that he might have issues with it.

Anyway, the more I think about and the more I read the more I think that the answer is somewhere in ADHD.

OK, back to the books.
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