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Fool Community Help Desk / The Feste Award


Subject:  On the battlements, last time Date:  6/23/2012  4:07 AM
Author:  MichaelRead Number:  4209 of 4296

The scene is the castle battlements, It is in the dark of night, dreary, and dank with more than a little hint of unexciting hours ahead before dawn breaks.

Two watchmen-of-the night speak.

Watchman one : “’Tis a dark night, dreary and dank with more than a hint of unexciting hours ahead before dawn breaks.”

Watchman two : “I know. I read the intro.”

Watchman one : “Of what dost thou talk?”

Watchman two: “That said by Don Pardo or Johnny Gilbert. Sets the scene stuff. You know, like Ed McMahon: ‘Heeeerrrreees Shakespeare.” Act three, scene two: on the battlements. Prolog. The words delineating. Prefix.”

Watchman one : “Prithee, sire, thou dost confuse.”

Watchman two: “Gageth me wit-es a spoon-eth. ‘Prithee’, my ass. Look, bubbella, how many are there of us and where the hell are we?”

Watchman one : “Astride the battlements of the castle watching over the safety of all within during the dark night.”

Watchman two: “And our sole purpose is stilted dialog. Jeez Louise, what next? For damn sure nothing because the intro specifies unexciting hours. Might as well take a nap.”

Enter MichaelR carrying the shield of Feste and a flaming sword.

Watchman two: “Holy crap.”

MichaelR in sepulchral tones: “Beware the transience of fame. It is fleeting and what was once regaled can turn to ashes. Time passes and with its passage fame lost like a ship’s wake that is smoothed by the tide.”

Watchman two: “Soliloquy much? Who writes your stuff? Aaron Sorkin on a bad day?”

Watchman one : “Yet the spirit of Feste tell of life and meanings not of mortal realm. Hearken to what he speaketh.”

Watchman two : “In a pig’s ear I hearken. He’s still pissed because he’s out of the running having usurped the award after six years of getting nowhere and who remember that but a few. Gawd Maud, his whole shtick has barnacles.”

Watchman one : “Yet with-eth his words-eth he say-eth truth-est. Yetr his time maybe-eth lost-eth.”

Watchman two : “Okay, we agree: MichaelR is toast. You do what you want with this apparition but I’m off to the canteen for a cruller.”

Enter William Shakespeare holding a large sign reading, “T-t-t-that’s all folks.”

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