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Subject:  Re: He Lost 95% of His "Friends" Date:  10/18/2012  10:58 AM
Author:  Frydaze1 Number:  183712 of 199075

First of all - congrats and best wishes for the marriage. I hope you will be very happy and successful at it.

Thank you!

Having one's own money also teaches you how to invest and handle finances - something EVERYONE needs to know.

I totally agree. The problem in my relationships is actually the opposite: I will take over all money handling, which leaves my SO without any independence. Also unhealthy.

I'm a huge fan of the his/mine/ours setup. Right now we only have his/mine, and it's already causing problems. Just this morning I had to request that he make a payment on his half of the wedding expenses (I paid for the whole thing, with the understanding that he'd reimburse me for half) and he wanted to know how much he owed. I set up a shared spreadsheet for all the expenses, I've showed him where it was multiple times, and he still turned to me to ask instead of looking at it himself. And when I reminded him that we have a spreadsheet, he asked if he has access to it. Which tells me he hasn't ever opened it.

A joint account into which he deposits a set amount regularly (or into which we both put our money before withdrawing a set allowance) will keep me from having to play bill collector on a regular basis. I hope. Meanwhile, it's a good thing I like handling the money. ;-)

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