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URL:  http://boards.fool.com/you-have-a-toxic-relationship-with-your-parents-30460006.aspx

Subject:  Re: Settlement Date:  1/1/2013  11:30 AM
Author:  MetroChick Number:  306592 of 308519

You have a toxic relationship with your parents. They're intentionally trying to keep you in some way financially dependent on them (such as by needing a roof over your head) so that you forever remain in a child-like state in the relationship. That isn't healthy, nor normal.

I stayed with my mom for 5 years in my early 30's to relocate to the DC area, pay off debt, and build an e-fund and home downpayment. She didn't charge me rent because her house is paid off, she liked my company, and the reason of me staying there was to build up savings. She never would have asked I spend money for "wants" for her instead of building a solid financial footing for myself. I have a couple other friends who have stayed with parents at some point in their adult lives and it's the same - they could always stay with parents/in-laws to help get themselves on better financial footing.

If you can't move out because you don't have enough savings and you can't save because they open your mail - then get a P.O. Box so you can keep your mail private, and have statements sent there. And then pay off debt, build an e-fund, build somekind of housing fund, move out and then invest. It doesn't sound like you're getting ahead in life - and it's not because of something like a car accident - it's because you're speculating/gambling with your finances instead of taking the steps necessary to get out of debt and build long-term savings.
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