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after a divorce, one can legally change one's ENTIRE name, and it is not limited to just "going back to the maiden name" - it can become Betty Rubble

One of our clients did that. The problem was that she was "Jane Austen" in all of our records at the office. The only place her new name of "Emily Dickinson" showed up was on the final divorce decree. So, at the time, no one thought there was any reason to go back and change her name over multiple databases. She contacted us a year or so after her account had been purged from the active system and with a mostly new staff, there was a lot of confusion!

I think the "same last name as the kids" is something that does not matter at all these days.

Unless it matters to the kids. DD#1 had her maiden name when she gave birth to DGD#2. DGD#2 still has DDs last name, but 3 years ago, DD#1 remarried and took on her new husband's last name. Then they had DGD#3, who has her dad's last name. Now DGD#2 is the odd man out as it were. She recently mentioned that she wants to have the same name as her mom and sister. We're working on how to do that without her stepdad formally adopting her.

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