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Author: KezFromOZ Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 8418  
Subject: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 7:28 AM
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What is the best invention for a mouse-trap you have discoverd?
**************

This is actually a little serious;o)

We have da mice an' we need the ideas. Ack!

KEZ(squeak)
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Author: DuckInMyShorts Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool CAPS All Star Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5905 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 8:04 AM
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A cat that hasn't been fed in 4 days...


Duck!


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Author: KezFromOZ Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5906 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 8:14 AM
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A cat that hasn't been fed in 4 days...
********

No such thing Ducky!


NEXT..............

KEZ

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Author: ROTJob Big funky green star, 20000 posts Top Favorite Fools Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5907 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 9:32 AM
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It all depends on how sick you are.

The poison works very well, but it leaves smelly corpses lying in hidden areas.

The traps are cool and if you are alert you can run tot hem right after the *SNAP* and see the final death twitches.

If you are truly sadistic, get the glue traps. They basically glue the mouse in place until you have time to come along and torture him. My personal favorite is to glue a piece of cheese just faw enough away that he can't get to it...and then watch him try to break his own neck to get it.



ROTJob

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Author: renyag Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5908 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 11:11 AM
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I think you should become intimately involved in the pursuit, capture, and kill of your prey. For mice, I reccommend this tedious procedure.
1) Identify the mouse hole of your prey.
2) Remove all your clothing, and sit with legs spread far apart in front of the mouse hole.
3) Insert an aromatic cheese in the orifice opposite the mouse hole.
4) Sit patiently until the mouse comes out of his/her hole.
5) Now this is the tricky part ~ as the mouse approaches the cheese, quietly tense you leg muscles. Once the mouse sniffs the cheese, snap your legs together violently, encapsulating the mouse in a death-dealing trap of cellulite. Ordinarilly the mouse will struggle for some moments, but for most hunters this is the ultimate thrill of the hunt as the wiggely little rodent squirms about.

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Author: tpault Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5909 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 1:05 PM
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For this trap you'll need:

Set a trip wire just outside their hole in the wall. Connect the trip wire to knife on a string, attatched to a pulley so that when the mouse trips the string, the knife moves aside and allows a bowling ball to roll down a ramp made out of books.

When the ball lands on the floor, make it hit a bowl of water, thereby splashing it up and onto some toilet paper that had been holding back a spring with a wooden match attatched to it. When the toilet paper gets wet, it will break to the pressure of the spring and it then flings the match across a piece of wood. The match then stops below a crayon, which, when melted and dripped onto a piece of paper, it is weighted down enough to bend, and cause two pieces of tinfoil to touch each other.

The wire leads on the finfoil come from a battery, and to a little hand-held fan. The fan blows, and knocks a domino over, which in turn begins knocking the other 137,369 dominos over that you have positioned all over your house from your basement, to your attic, and back down to your kitchen.

The last domino falls over and hits the alarm button on an alarm clock. This will wake up your cat, who will spring off the window ledge where she always sleeps, and will then pounce on the...

spatula that you've positioned just under where the cat slept. The spatula will trip a lever on a helium tank, thereby filling up a balloon you have over the nipple of the valve. The balloon fills up until it breaks free, and then it shoots off of there and hopefully knocks an egg out of the cabinet.

The egg falls, and here's where it gets tricky, and lands on your blender button. The blender spins and spins, but is attatched to a rubber band that stretches and stretches until it cocks the broom it is attatched to.

The mouse should be right about on the "X" on the floor by now, and the blender should let loose of the string, thereby flinging the broom forward with great force, and sweeping the mouse harmlessly into a trash can laying on it's side but with a spring loaded lid. The mouse hits the toothpick that held the lid open, and when you get home, you can take the cute little bugger out to a field behind your house, and shoot it with a 12 guage shotgun or whatever else you want to do with it.

By far, this is the simplest way I've found to get rid of mice.

Paul T.


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Author: renyag Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5910 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 2:45 PM
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Sounds good to me except The mouse hits the toothpick that held the lid open, if you don't have any more tootpicks, or maybe you're saving the last few you have for pickin' your teeth, cause you're thinkin' about eatin' some beef jerky after you make the kill, could you substitute one of those plastic coffee stirs they have on the counter at the convenience store, near where you get your coffee, or hotchocolate, or cappocino if you live in the sort of area where they have cappocino at your neighborhood convenience store, I mean we don't, cause ther ain't no cappucino cupholder on a John Deere tractor, which reminds me, I really should pick up some beef jerky when I'm down there next, that is if I'm goin' down there to pick up some of those reddish coffee stirs I was askin' you about?

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Author: DuckInMyShorts Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool CAPS All Star Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5911 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 3:17 PM
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Okay, let me try.

First, you get a 5 gallon bucket half filled with gasoline and a small swimming pool motion detector alarm with a relay to close when it's activated.

Then you erect a ramp, maybe made of a four-foot long piece of wood. One end is on the ground, the other end is sticking about 6 inches from the lip of the bucket over the center of the bucket.

Hanging down a few inches below the end of the top of the ramp is a piece of peanut butter or cheese using a fishing line. But this food is not attached to the END of the line, the food is tied up in the middle of the line, with the remainder hanging down into the gasoline and a fishing bobber.

(...stick with me now, this gets better!...)

The motion detector is attached to a 12-volt battery, hooked to a pair of alligator clips, attached to a model rocket engine igniter inserted into an Estes D12-7 model rocket engine duct-taped with the end pointed down in the direction of the gasoline.

How does it work?

1) Mouse climbs up ramp, maybe you have to scatter some cheese or food on the ramp to keep his interest to get to the end of the ramp and see the hanging piece of cheese.
2) Mouse then tries to climb down or hang from the end of the ramp, partially balanced by hanging onto the fishing line.
3) But the motion of the mouse trying to hang onto the fishing line makes the bobber move, causing s small motion, received by the detector.
4) The motion detector switches the relay to complete the circuit to the battery, the alligator clips, and the igniter.
5) Igniter is fired, starting the model rocket engine.
6) The ensuing stream of sparks and hot ash from the model rocket engine sets the gasoline on fire:

MOUSE FLAMBE!!!!


I love it when a plan comes together.


EvilDuck!


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Author: renyag Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5912 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 6:28 PM
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First, you get a 5 gallon bucket half filled with gasoline

Duck, I have to stop you right there, everyone know a half-filled bucket of gasoline is very dangerous, cause the empty half is where the fumes hang out, and that's them vapors that go KABLOOEY!

Then you erect a ramp

Butt, I like this part, cause I always been partial to ramps, and inclined planes, and I'm particularly fond of erections.

below the end of the top of the ramp is a piece of peanut butter or cheese using a fishing line

OK, I unnerstand the concept of 'a piece of peanut butter', but I'm having trouble figgering out how to train the cheese to use the fishing line. Everything else is pretty much straight forward ~ how big should the alligators be? And what happens if the mouse has a bic pocket lighter, and flicks that into the bucket, before you get to hang the cheese? What did the cheese do to deserve to be hung?

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Author: DuckInMyShorts Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool CAPS All Star Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5913 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 10:29 PM
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Duck, I have to stop you right there, everyone know a half-filled bucket of gasoline is very dangerous, cause the empty half is where the fumes hang out, and that's them vapors that go KABLOOEY!

Well that's the FUN part! If there were no KABLOOEY, then it wouldn't be worth the effort!

It would be well worth it just to have a 5-gallon bucket half full of gasoline anyway just if nothing more than to throw a mouse and a match into the bucket directly!

Duck!
...flammable, inflammable, non-flammable, hell, either it FLAMS or it doesn't!

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Author: KezFromOZ Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5914 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/17/2002 11:38 PM
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Hmmmmmmmm!

fings are gettin' real ugly around here!

Maybe I shouldn't ask the next question but what the heck!

How do you eliminate mice of mass proportions?....Plural x too many!
....and' don't say 'blow up the house, pleazzzzze':o)

Pault,

your idea is fabulous dude but no good at this kinda thing.
Do I hear a volunteer anywhere? Someone that has had a few successful erections in the past!

KËZ(hates mieces to pieces):oP



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Author: MichaelRead Big gold star, 5000 posts Feste Award Winner! Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5915 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 1:09 AM
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We have a rat in our house. We also have four cats, one of whom brings in dead rats from outside as a gift to us, but none of them has the slightest interest in catching the house rat.

We have a feeding area for the cats: bowls of this and that stuff recommended by the vet. Late at night, house rat climbs down this pipe and that and nibbles. I have, late at night, seen House Rat. I have to say that Iams agrees with it since his coat is sleek and shiny.

Catch that sucker? I laid one of those humungous rat traps. Nada. I bought a Have-A-Heart humane trap. Nada. Then this.

I was sleepless and got up and had a cup of tea sitting at the kitchen table. Must have been about three in the morning. I saw House Rat eating cat food and, like an idiot, made that pssp sound I give when I want the cats to come. Damned if he didn't come closer. He looked at me and I looked at him and if I had a stick I could have clobbered him. But, what the hey. I figure that if he can survive four cats he has a charmed life. But I wonder about that. Here's me, sipping tea, the House Rat close by, and a cat on my lap. Cat wasn't interested in House Rat. House Rat seemed indifferent to the cat. Now I know what's going on: the House Rat and the cats are in collusion. It's as if, outside you're dead meat, inside you're family.

I think we need a cat psychiatrist.

MichaelR




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Author: KezFromOZ Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5916 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 5:48 AM
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I think we need a cat psychiatrist.
********
Yep, Michael, you dooooo, however when those yittle vermon eyes look up at ya, sheesh, ya kinda know how the cat feels!

Kez is thinking of calling in 'The Pied Piper'....anyone got his number?

:oP

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Author: renyag Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5919 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 9:50 AM
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How do you eliminate mice of mass proportions?....

Geeze, wheeze dinnit no u was deelin' wif a multi-pool pwoblem wif mieces. Dat's a diffrent pwoblem. Can u git a fwame-thwower frum ur fwiendly govment surplus deeler? Dat's were we gits our cheeze, and oatmeal, and redbeams and rice to feed the foster kids. Good money in dat if u keep 'em kinda skinny.
Or maybe u cood train some 'roos to jump around and stomp on 'em, den bwing in sum wombats to eat up all da carcasses. I mean, don't u Aussies hab all kindsa poisonous and deadly critters down der, dat u cood maybe use as a biomylogical control for da rodant pwoblem? How 'bout sum of doz poisonous toads dat the hippies suck on? Couln't u just go to Melborne, get a bus-load of hippies, have 'em suk on sum toads, den dey cood stomp on da mieces in sum sorta crazed halleluehicigenic trance? Corse, den you'd have 'hippie' pwoblem. Ain't it just like 1 ting leads 2 amother.

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Author: KezFromOZ Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5920 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 10:30 AM
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Geeze, wheeze dinnit no u was deelin' wif a multi-pool pwoblem wif mieces. Dat's a diffrent pwoblem. Can u git a fwame-thwower frum ur fwiendly govment surplus deeler? Dat's were we gits our cheeze, and oatmeal, and redbeams and rice to feed the foster kids. Good money in dat if u keep 'em kinda skinny.
Or maybe u cood train some 'roos to jump around and stomp on 'em, den bwing in sum wombats to eat up all da carcasses. I mean, don't u Aussies hab all kindsa poisonous and deadly critters down der, dat u cood maybe use as a biomylogical control for da rodant pwoblem? How 'bout sum of doz poisonous toads dat the hippies suck on? Couln't u just go to Melborne, get a bus-load of hippies, have 'em suk on sum toads, den dey cood stomp on da mieces in sum sorta crazed halleluehicigenic trance? Corse, den you'd have 'hippie' pwoblem. Ain't it just like 1 ting leads 2 amother.
***********************

Ren!

can you run dat by me's again?

KËZ

(da toads are called 'magic mushrooms')
HOW DUZ YOU KNOW SO MUCH?

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Author: Raggmopp Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5921 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 10:48 AM
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Catch that sucker? I laid one of those humungous rat traps. Nada. I bought a Have-A-Heart humane trap. Nada. Then this.
===*===

It's your bait that's wrong. Slather the business end of yer Weatherby Mark V® Super VarmintMaster with peanut butter some night and try it again...

Da Mopp

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Author: gayner Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5924 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 2:10 PM
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Slather the business end of yer Weatherby Mark V® Super VarmintMaster with peanut butter some night and try it again...

R U cwazy? If I slather the end of my...with peanut butter, what will I use when I go muff-diving next Tuesday?


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Author: Raggmopp Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5925 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 3:01 PM
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R U cwazy? If I slather the end of my...with peanut butter, what will I use when I go muff-diving next Tuesday?
===*===

If yer using a Weatherby for that sport I believe you're doing it wrong. : Þ

Raggmopp


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Author: MichaelRead Big gold star, 5000 posts Feste Award Winner! Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5926 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 5:25 PM
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Wrong bait? Let me tell you about bait. I got a list from experts and tried them all. Peanut butter: licked clean off the trap and a small note asking for strawberry jam next time. GummiBears: again nibbled off and this time the note read, “Do you have JuJubes?”

I know where this sucker lives and I know he has to take a certain path to get to the cat food (which I think he likes – he left a 25-cent tip) so what I have to do is relatively simple: mine it with a Claymore. And, following Lt. Cusper's advice, back it up with a 9mm Uzi chambered for cyanide filled hollow point.

You may think that I have been lax catching House Rat and I have. But House Rat doesn't barf like the cats do or does it scratch the furniture. It doesn't shed, either. And for hairballs, forget it. Does it come over to borrow my lawnmower? No. Hold late night parties with revving cars and beer bottles on the drive? No. All that sucker does is eat a few cents worth of cat food a month. Damn it, it's a cheap pet. Did I mention no vet bills?

How did he get here? No way to get in the house but I believe he was caught outside as a youngster and brought in as a trophy by one of our cats. So, in effect, he was invited in – somewhat forcefully yet brought in and now living in the lap of luxury feeding on Iams and cat kibble. And the cats don't give a tinker's dam. I think they know that if one of them catches House Rat I'll expect more rats caught and I think the neighborhood has been de-ratted to the point there's little pickings.

Bait, Raggmopp? Tonight I am going to try a nice medium-rare steak with two veggies and if he turns his nose up at that I'll cut him dead socially.

MichaelR




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Author: rehowes Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5927 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 5:36 PM
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Let me tell you about bait. I got a list from experts and tried them all. Peanut butter: licked clean off the trap and a small note asking for strawberry jam next time. GummiBears: again nibbled off and this time the note read, “Do you have JuJubes?”

I assume that if House Rat can write (s)he can also read. This is a bad sign. The only other cases where I have heard tell of reading rats have also involved in bad endings (or nearly so) for nearby humans.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Randall

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Author: Raggmopp Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5930 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/18/2002 7:52 PM
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Tonight I am going to try a nice medium-rare steak with two veggies and if he turns his nose up at that I'll cut him dead socially.
===*===

C'mon Michael, admit it, you LIKE the rat as a pet. Now if it would just purr and snuggle, huh?

Da Mopp

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Author: KYHAWKEYE Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5956 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/26/2002 10:37 AM
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By far, this is the simplest way I've found to get rid of mice.

Paul T.


Didn't I see this on a Tom & Jerry cartoon once???? ;{)


KY Hawkeye


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Author: KYHAWKEYE Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 5957 of 8418
Subject: Re: Challenge -130 Mouse Traps Date: 9/26/2002 11:02 AM
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Phone Number for the Pied Piper:

BR549

KY Hawkwye

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