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Challenge 135: Make up a statistic that sounds like it just might be believable. example:

Did you realize that an average of 23 motorists die each year in the United States from picking their nose while they're driving? The deaths are the result of their finger being forcefully entered up into their brain cavity when they hit a big bump in the road.


Fiat
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Challenge 135: Make up a statistic that sounds like it just might be believable.

"96.8% of TMF users polled stated they hate pop-up ads on the site."

Diane
- stats-r-us
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"5 out of every 4 people don't understand fractions."



Duck!
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Every year 219,235 pounds of dog poop are deposited insisde American homes by dogs either not yet house-trained or left too long inside by their owners.

Idaho has the highest per capita household deposit of any state due to the relative popularity of larger breeds there. San Francisco has the lowest of any city, for obvious reasons.

--fleg
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69% of all people who have an uninvited guest named Richard living in their basement are gay.

Fiat
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When a true or false question is posed by his spouse to the average married male in the United States, there is a 50-50 chance that he will choose the correct answer and a 90% chance he will choose the incorrect answer. This is referred to as the 50-50-90 rule.

Fiat
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4 of every 5 persons who have or care for children still in diapers will at least one time during their lives ask themselves "Why don't they make these damn wipes flushable?" Of these 4 persons, 2 will carry the thought through to "Why don't they make these for adults" after an especially messy bowel movement whose onset occurred when that person was already running late for work and ends up using half a roll of toilet paper in a vain attempt to prevent skid marks. The 1 remaining person from the original 5 persons mentioned will experience a clogged toilet on average at least once a month while the child in diapers is in their care.

Fiat
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9 out of 10 posts on ITF board that contained no actual suggestion were pulled yesterday.

Oh wait, we're supposed to make up a statistic.

IF
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9 out of 10 posts on ITF board that contained no actual suggestion were pulled yesterday.
===*===

Depends on who you are ol' buddy. For you 'n me yes, for others, they can't be bothered.

Raggmopp
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34% of the members of the Motley Fool believe that the term "Woot!" means to have an erection while visiting Great Britain.

Fiat
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Of course I recced it.

Raggmopp
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Right back at ya! Woot!

Fiat
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Of course, we all know the meaning of the word "woot." It's a part of the language known as "Buckwheat-ology" and is part of a famous song:

Woot mood moo do if i'm slang out om tune, woot moo tand up mand malk mout om meef? Oh i'm bet by mit a mittle help fom my fends...Yah gomma try mit a mittle help fom my fends

Wootn't you know it, now that tune is going to be stuck in my head all day long!

Paul T.
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Woot mood moo do if i'm slang out om tune, woot moo tand up mand malk mout om meef? Oh i'm bet by mit a mittle help fom my fends...Yah gomma try mit a mittle help fom my fends
===*===

Nurse. NURSE!
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5 out of 10 Chinese have Cataracts.
The other 5 out of 10 have Rincoln Contirentals.

Paul T.
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In a recent survey of beer drinkers six percent said they preferred a light beer, three percent said they liked a dark beer and 91 percent said, “Who cares as long as you get blasted?”

Of this 91 percent, 17 percent said they drank beer because it made them feel good, 18 percent said that drinking beer was a way of meeting female beer drinkers, and 75 percent said they enjoyed projectile vomiting.

Of the feel good group, 45 percent said that beer is 'a social lubricant' while 55 percent said that you only rent beer and had many good discussions in the men's room. Of those drinking beer to meet members of the other sex, 33 percent said that sharing a beer with a woman was pleasurable; 66 percent said that beer is a cheap alternative to liquor as a panty dropper. Of those enjoying visiting the porcelain throne, almost 99 percent said that they enjoyed the colors.

MichaelR


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Methinks you've been sampling the goods...

Of this 91 percent, 17 percent said they drank beer because it made them feel good, 18 percent said that drinking beer was a way of meeting female beer drinkers, and 75 percent said they enjoyed projectile vomiting.

17 + 18 + 75 = 110% (unless you allowed more than one choice <g>).

Ira

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After the first 3 or 4 beers, numbers start to lose their significance. This is known in the scientific world as "draft drift". Therefore, for those partaking, the perception of the poll participant makes the numbers perfectly proportional. It's just that it's impossible for the partakers to say "for those partaking, the perception of the poll participant makes the numbers perfectly proportional", so the poll tallywhacker, er...tallyperson (BBBBBBEEELLLLLLLCH!!!) must assume that the (Hic!) lush knows what the heck in the wide wide world of sports is going on! Don't you get it? I mean, why do people just not (hic!) understannnn. Nobody gets to unnnnerstann anymore. Thass not how it yuse ta be in the good olll daze. (SSSPPPPlllllooooosssssh!) Sorryyy dude, mannn did i get annny on ya?

Fiat
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CHESTNUT ALERT - I can't believe that nobady has done this one.

Three out of every four fools make up 75% of Fooldom.

Shocking.

Randall
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18 percent said that drinking beer was a way of meeting female beer drinkers

Ahh...but do you know what 7 out of 10 men said when asked if they knew why women have two holes instead of one?

So you can carry them home like a six-pack when they've had too much to drink

Paul T.
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99 out of 100 beer drinkers have been quoted as saying "I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me, than a full frontal labotomy

Paul T.
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Mr. R. "Say Raggmopp, know why beer goes through you so fast?"

Raggmopp "No Mr. R, why?"

Mr. R. "It ain't gotta change color."

<baddarumpbump*ching*>
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1. Skeleton walks into a bar. Says Gimme a beer and a mop.

2. Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says Why the long face?

3. A guy pounds his drink on the bar and a midget runs down to him. The guy smacks the midget in the head, and then the midget unzips, and services him. Guy sitting next to the man at the bar says "Cool, can I do it? Man says "Sure." So the guy sitting next to the man at the bar says "Cool, but don't hit me as hard as you hit the midget.

Paul T.
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1. Skeleton walks into a bar. Says Gimme a beer and a mop.

2. Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says Why the long face?

3. A guy pounds his drink on the bar and a midget runs down to him. The guy smacks the midget in the head, and then the midget unzips, and services him. Guy sitting next to the man at the bar says "Cool, can I do it? Man says "Sure." So the guy sitting next to the man at the bar says "Cool, but don't hit me as hard as you hit the midget.



7% of posters who respond to a thread will post funny, albeit antique, jokes to the thread instead of sticking to the topic.

--fleg, 95% picky, the other 13% just plain ornery
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--fleg, 95% picky, the other 13% just plain ornery
===*===

Ah, an accountant.

Da Mopp
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24,537,666 voters out of 50 voted for Sadaam Hussein.

Paul T.
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24,537,666 voters out of 50 voted for Sadaam Hussein.
===*===

Expressed another way 100% of the folks who wanted to live voted for him.
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In a prospective double-blinded, double-dummy, triple-thick cross-sectional cohort study performed at Boden State University's Department for Irreproducable Results, we found the following results:

1. 46% feel the main-stream press is biased,

2. 27% feel that the press should be dropped, and replaced with half-court man-to-man coverage,

3. 15% feel that it should all be permanent press, and ironing forever banned,

4. 11.9999999999% prefer small lakes and creeks over the main streams,
and finally

5. 1 person refused to answer, feeling it was idiotic to try to set our printing press up in a stream.

KY Hawkeye, Pharm.D.- Chief of Pharmaceutical Research (BlackHole Development, Inc.) and Chairman, Department for Irreproducable Results, Boden State University (BS U)

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Challenge 135: Make up a statistic that sounds like it just might be believable

A remarkable 99.6% of those who recommended this post are considered by their peers to be "extremely sexually attractive" (there is a 0.4% reporting error).

75.8% of those who read this post, but did not recommend it were reported by their family members to have unusually large ears.

16.2% of nonrecommenders had normal ears but unusually long hair growing from those ears.

The remaining 8.0% of nonrecommenders are invertebrates.
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In a recent test, it was discovered that 99 out of 100 men who tried Camels went back to women.
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