UnThreaded | Threaded | Whole Thread (25) | Ignore Thread Prev Thread | Next Thread
Author: possum2000 Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 308881  
Subject: credit and community property Date: 7/26/2012 9:04 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 2
I am looking for information and general ideas about how to separate finances from a legal perspective when married and living in a community property state.

I understand eventually I need to talk to a lawyer and that nobody on here is giving me legal advice. I'd just like to be better informed before shopping for lawyers.

What's happening is that my husband and I keep separate accounts for everything. My income is mine, his is his (from our perspective). I pay most or all our living expenses, we live in my house from before the marriage. Turns out he is rather terrible at paying bills ontime and consequently has had several accounts in collection that keep popping up. In one recent collection it went to court for "entry of default" judgment and I got named on the lawsuit because of living in a community property state. I frequently don't hear about any of it unless I happen to see a suspicious letter in the mail and open it first.

I haven't checked my credit report lately (I'm planning to) but my credit rating should be very high, it was last I checked. Nothing ever late, low debt utilization, etc.

My first goal is to protect myself, my credit, my assets from getting attacked or damaged due to his actions or inactions with creditors. I am wondering if there is a legal way to do so... for example (too late now but) a prenuptial agreement disclaiming community property, separate accounts (which we have) with some kind of legally binding agreement or document that our accounts are separate property not community property. Can I legally get access to his credit report, bank accounts, put watches on his credit reports? Other ideas?

Yes I have other goals like getting him to pay his bills ontime and clean up his own credit which I'm guessing is wrecked currently and may take years to age off his record. But as I said my first focus is to protect my assets and my credit rating.

Thanks in advance
Possum
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
Author: aj485 Big gold star, 5000 posts Feste Award Nominee! Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305646 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/26/2012 10:53 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 5
Turns out he is rather terrible at paying bills ontime and consequently has had several accounts in collection that keep popping up. In one recent collection it went to court for "entry of default" judgment and I got named on the lawsuit because of living in a community property state. I frequently don't hear about any of it unless I happen to see a suspicious letter in the mail and open it first.

I haven't checked my credit report lately (I'm planning to) but my credit rating should be very high, it was last I checked. Nothing ever late, low debt utilization, etc.


I would suggest checking your credit report sooner, rather than later. If you were named in a judgment, it is likely that your credit report/score isn't as good as you think it should be.

My first goal is to protect myself, my credit, my assets from getting attacked or damaged due to his actions or inactions with creditors. I am wondering if there is a legal way to do so... for example (too late now but) a prenuptial agreement disclaiming community property, separate accounts (which we have) with some kind of legally binding agreement or document that our accounts are separate property not community property.

These are questions for an attorney in your state. You can get better educated by using google to search for information about community property laws in your state. Some states (presumably yours, since you were named in the judgment) allow comunity debt as well as community assets, as long as the debt was incurred to 'benefit the community'. You should ask the attorney if you are basically paying the bills for the community, and the debt that he is accumulating is only for his benefit, is there a way that you can shield yourself from being named in suits. Absent that, if your state allows community debt, you may be out of luck.

Can I legally get access to his credit report, bank accounts, put watches on his credit reports?

Not without his permission.

Other ideas?

There's the old joke - Why is divorce so expensive? Because it's worth it!

You really need to consult a family law attorney who is experienced with debt/credit issues to see if there is any way to protect yourself. However, given that in a community property state, your marriage contract has joined your financial lives together, there may not be, unless you get a divorce.

AJ

Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
Author: possum2000 Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305647 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/27/2012 10:55 AM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
I agree with AJ that I need to consult an attorney. My intention in the original post was to fish for ideas or previous experience from others if they know of a similar situation and what worked there. For example a retroactive pre-nuptial (if there is such a thing, and if that would work), or some type of contract between spouses that stipulates what is or is not community property, etc.

As AJ suggested I already have googled laws for my state (AZ) about community property and spent lots of time reading them so far.

I wanted ideas / experiences from others before I consult an attorney. My experiences with attorneys tell me I have a much stronger interest in a good solution than they do :-)

Possum

Print the post Back To Top
Author: vkg Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305648 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/27/2012 1:25 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
Does he living beyond his income, or just sloppy paying his bills?

My husband is a wonderful person, but when we were married he had a history of being careless with bills. Autopay and some assistence with tracking bills was all that he needed.

Print the post Back To Top
Author: possum2000 Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305649 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/27/2012 1:57 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
Mostly he is sloppy paying his bills. A little bit of "beyond his means" but that hasn't been a big problem so far. I have helped me help him by setting up online access to his accounts whenever I can, and I look at them with his permission. It has reduced but not eliminated the surprises for me.

Possum

Print the post Back To Top
Author: aj485 Big gold star, 5000 posts Feste Award Nominee! Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305650 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/27/2012 3:28 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 2
My intention in the original post was to fish for ideas or previous experience from others if they know of a similar situation and what worked there. For example a retroactive pre-nuptial (if there is such a thing, and if that would work), or some type of contract between spouses that stipulates what is or is not community property, etc.

Sure, you can put together a post-nuptial agreement. Both parties must sign voluntarily, generally in front of a notary, it can't be an 'unconscionable' agreement (so you should probably each have your own attorney) and you may need to record it - all very similar to the pre-nup process. The main difference in executing this is that you are already married.

Whether the post-nup can override the designation of community property that has already been acquired, or if it can only be applied to future acquisitions of property by the community is a question for the attorney, as it would likely be dependent on state laws.

However, I'm not sure that an agreement like this will do much to help you protect your credit history from things like judgments while you're still married, since they are generally used to help divide assets in cases of where the marriage breaks up, not where it's still on-going. Again, that's a question that an attorney will have to answer.

You might want to check on the Lawyers/Attorneys board here http://boards.fool.com/lawyersattorneys-116229.aspx

I wanted ideas / experiences from others before I consult an attorney. My experiences with attorneys tell me I have a much stronger interest in a good solution than they do :-)

Your best course of action in order to protect your credit history might be to actually take over his bill-paying for him, if he's amenable to that.

AJ

Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
Author: JAFO31 Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305651 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/27/2012 4:18 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 2
possum2000: "I am looking for information and general ideas about how to separate finances from a legal perspective when married and living in a community property state.

I understand eventually I need to talk to a lawyer and that nobody on here is giving me legal advice. I'd just like to be better informed before shopping for lawyers.

My first goal is to protect myself, my credit, my assets from getting attacked or damaged due to his actions or inactions with creditors. I am wondering if there is a legal way to do so... for example (too late now but) a prenuptial agreement disclaiming community property, separate accounts (which we have) with some kind of legally binding agreement or document that our accounts are separate property not community property. Can I legally get access to his credit report, bank accounts, put watches on his credit reports? Other ideas?

Yes I have other goals like getting him to pay his bills ontime and clean up his own credit which I'm guessing is wrecked currently and may take years to age off his record. But as I said my first focus is to protect my assets and my credit rating."


First, I am not an Arizona lawyer and do not know Arizona law.

Second, you really do need to speak to an Arizona attorney.

Third, you do not mention a divorce, but what if the only way to protect yourself as you wish is to divorce?

Last, without vouching for any of the following sites, they do appear to offer an overview:

http://www.mckindles-law.com/divorce-bankruptcy/c-spouse-deb...

http://www.hildebrandlaw.com/faqs/az-community-property/

http://www.attorneys-arizona.com/blog/arizona-divorce-attorn...

I found those sites with a quick Google search, so I suspect that you can find background information you want if you devote mre time.

Good Luck!

JAFO

Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
Author: aj485 Big gold star, 5000 posts Feste Award Nominee! Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305652 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/27/2012 6:39 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 5
My first goal is to protect myself, my credit, my assets from getting attacked or damaged due to his actions or inactions with creditors.

In reading about Arizona's community property laws and how they are enforced, they seem to be pretty generous about being able to assign responsibility for debt to both parties, from a creditor's point of view. In this case, you are unlikely to be able to keep a creditor from naming you in a suit to collect, even if you have a post-nup agreement in place. You would likely have to go to court to prove that there were no community assets that could be attached if a judgment was awarded, so you should not be considered a valid party to the suit. So, are you willing to keep an attorney on retainer to help protect your credit history from being subject to judgments?

Yes I have other goals like getting him to pay his bills ontime and clean up his own credit which I'm guessing is wrecked currently and may take years to age off his record. But as I said my first focus is to protect my assets and my credit rating.

I see 3 possilibities to meet your goals to protect your assets and credit from your husband's (in)actions, none of which are probably what you want to hear:

- Move from Arizona to a state where it's not as easy to assign responsibilty for 'community' debt to the party who didn't actually incur the debt
- Remove yourself from the 'community' by getting a divorce
- Ensure that minimum payments on all his accounts are made on time by making the payments yourself

AJ

Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
Author: possum2000 Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305653 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/28/2012 10:40 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
Whether the post-nup can override the designation of community property that has already been acquired, or if it can only be applied to future acquisitions of property by the community is a question for the attorney,

Agree, that is a good question. Thank you for helping me to articulate it.

However, I'm not sure that an agreement like this will do much to help you protect your credit history from things like judgments

My goal is also to protect my assets, not just my history. I had considerably more financially when we married than he did. I may need to set up separate accounts that clearly separate my assets acquired before marriage vs after. Extra work and pain, but I am certainly considering it.

Your best course of action in order to protect your credit history might be to actually take over his bill-paying for him, if he's amenable to that.

Good suggestion. I have been trying to do so with his permission since we married.

It is proving difficult to do so with 100% certainty because of a few factors. He sometimes has bills sent to his previous address (his brother still lives there) or to his parents address. In which case I am almost guaranteed never to see the bill or even hear of its existence. I don't think the address thing is done maliciously, he has great difficulty remembering addresses and phone numbers. I have convinced him to carry a piece of paper in his wallet with our address but for reasons I don't fully understand he sometimes forgets he has that and will blurt out the other addresses because he remembers them. Generally if I am with him I either correct him or else fill out forms on his behalf. It really taxes and stresses him to fill out any type of paperwork. It is amusing when it doesn't eventually lead to negative repercussions for me, such as missing a bill. I realize it isn't quite the same, but it reminds me in a way of what Determined Mom went thru with her DH when she wished to account for every penny and his "spending money" invariably did not match receipts. As I recall she had to find a way to minimize the size of the holes in accounting and find a way to live with it when they still existed. I might have to do the same but I am open to suggestions how to better plug my "incoming bills of my husband's."

Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
Author: possum2000 Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305654 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/28/2012 10:45 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 2
you do not mention a divorce, but what if the only way to protect yourself as you wish is to divorce?

I am not inclined to divorce him, he has lots of very wonderful attributes in many other ways and my life is generally much better with him. That isn't to say I would never consider divorce, I'm just highly motivated to try and find other solutions first.

Thank you for the links.

Possum

Print the post Back To Top
Author: vkg Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305655 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/28/2012 10:59 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 4
He sometimes has bills sent to his previous address (his brother still lives there) or to his parents address.

It is an unusual personality trait. If it isn't intentional, then it is necessary to deal with the consequences. Have you considered giving his brother and parents envelopes to send any wayward mail to your address?

You could file a change of address for your husband for his brother's and parent's address. It would for the next year send wayward mail your way.

Also, a service that allows frequent checks of credit history would be useful. It won't stop all of the suprises, but would allow you to see when accounts become past due.

Print the post Back To Top
Author: possum2000 Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305656 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/28/2012 11:03 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
You would likely have to go to court to prove that there were no community assets that could be attached if a judgment was awarded, so you should not be considered a valid party to the suit.

I appreciate you taking the time to read about AZ's specific community property laws. I reached pretty much the same conclusion as you state above when I read them.

are you willing to keep an attorney on retainer to help protect your credit history from being subject to judgments?

Yes but my (limited) experience so far with trying to retain attorneys has generally showed that the cases are "too small" to be of interest for the attorneys. And in some instances I have even known detailed provisions of AZ law better than the attorney I consulted (for example, what dollar amount separates small claims from civil cases from superior court cases in AZ). So I am not hopeful that this is a good general solution, but it might help on a case by case basis.

I see 3 possibilities...
- Move from Arizona...

Not likely, but good to remember as a potential solution


- Remove yourself from the 'community' by getting a divorce

Also not likely (see my reply to JAFO).

Ensure that minimum payments on all his accounts are made on time by making the payments yourself

For now that might be the most feasible though not pleasant. It is also complicated by the lack of certainty that I have about whether I actually see 100% of his bills (per my post earlier tonight.)

I appreciate your thoughts and analysis about this.

Possum

Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
Author: aj485 Big gold star, 5000 posts Feste Award Nominee! Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305657 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/28/2012 11:37 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 4
- Remove yourself from the 'community' by getting a divorce

Also not likely (see my reply to JAFO).

Well, getting divorced doesn't necessarily mean leaving the relationship. You would be ending the legal relationship, but could still maintain the emotional and cohabitation part of the relationship. As an example, my parents started dating again after his second marriage ende, several years after their (fairly bitter) divorce. He was a much better date than a husband, according to Mom. ;-) Your guy might be a better domestic partner than husband, at least as long as you live in Arizona.

Ensure that minimum payments on all his accounts are made on time by making the payments yourself

For now that might be the most feasible though not pleasant. It is also complicated by the lack of certainty that I have about whether I actually see 100% of his bills (per my post earlier tonight.)

I agree that the suggestion of getting brother/parents to send any mail to you and/or signing up for a credit monitoring service might help with this. Another possibility would be for him to place a credit freeze on his accounts. None of these are fool-proof, but they could be helpful.

AJ

Print the post Back To Top
Author: alstroemeria Big gold star, 5000 posts Top Recommended Fools Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305659 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/29/2012 10:31 AM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 4
He sometimes has bills sent to his previous address (his brother still lives there) or to his parents address. ...I don't think the address thing is done maliciously, he has great difficulty remembering addresses and phone numbers. I have convinced him to carry a piece of paper in his wallet with our address but for reasons I don't fully understand he sometimes forgets he has that and will blurt out the other addresses because he remembers them. ...It really taxes and stresses him to fill out any type of paperwork.

This seems to me to go beyond simple bad memory or finance-phobia. I think your husband should consider a thorough medical evaluation, including neurological and psychological.

I have always had a bad memory (such that my daughter once quipped, "Mom, we'll never know when YOU have Alzheimers!"), but this is way beyond me. And I am also paperwork-phobic, but again this is beyond me. I have moved relatively often and occasionally stumble over my current phone number or zip code, but have never given a previous address, even a very recent one.

Print the post Back To Top
Author: vkg Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305660 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/29/2012 11:39 AM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 2
It really taxes and stresses him to fill out any type of paperwork.

Is there any chance that he has dyslexia or another learning disability? If it was just that he hadn't learned to read and write, he wouldn't be having problems remembering addresses. Knowing why might make it easier for him to deal with it.

Print the post Back To Top
Author: possum2000 Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305661 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/29/2012 11:20 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
I have always had a bad memory (such that my daughter once quipped, "Mom, we'll never know when YOU have Alzheimers!"),

Thanks for the laugh, that made me smile!

Print the post Back To Top
Author: possum2000 Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305662 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/29/2012 11:26 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
Yes he has dyslexia. I have seen him spell the name "Eric" at least 4 different ways. Kind of amusing given that one of my goals as a kid was to win the national spelling bee (no I didn't make it.) Aggravating when it comes to things like remembering addresses and phone numbers.

Possum

Print the post Back To Top
Author: 2gifts Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305663 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/30/2012 9:18 AM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 2
Yes he has dyslexia. I have seen him spell the name "Eric" at least 4 different ways. Kind of amusing given that one of my goals as a kid was to win the national spelling bee (no I didn't make it.) Aggravating when it comes to things like remembering addresses and phone numbers.

So maybe you need a different approach here. Maybe you need to do something to accommodate his dyslexia. Would he let you take over paying all his bills from his accounts? That way, you could ensure that they are being paid, and they are still being paid from his accounts so you continue to have separate finances. It would be as though he were hiring you to be his business manager, and so you'd handle all the logistics around the bill paying.

That won't help your problem where he can't remember the address, but maybe you can get him to let you do that sort of paperwork and just handle all the finances. Maybe you could also get him to put in a change-of-address at the post office so that all his mail that goes to his parents' house would be forwarded to you, and then you can go in and make the address change for those accounts.

He would just have to give you permission on all of his accounts, and then you can even call in and deal with issues over the phone.

This has worked well for us on the accounts that DH has in his own name as we each have separate accounts although we do co-mingle all our finances.

It just seems to me that you might be dealing with issues from his dyslexia that may also be embarrassing for him to admit or request help with, and so being proactive here might help both of you achieve your goals.

Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
Author: RayKinsella Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305664 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/30/2012 12:32 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
He would just have to give you permission on all of his accounts, and then you can even call in and deal with issues over the phone.

This has worked well for us on the accounts that DH has in his own name as we each have separate accounts although we do co-mingle all our finances.


Excellent advice.
In our marriage our approach has been to have separate accounts, one for me and one for her, but both are joint accounts. i have written less than three checks in 15 years from her account and vice versa. But the point is I could, if an issue arose.
Ray

Print the post Back To Top
Author: MetroChick Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305665 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/30/2012 2:11 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
If you really think the problems are bad habits and possible learning disability, than I think you should invite your husband to go to the attorney with you, so discussing how to keep your good credit high is out in the open (and maybe he'll see how things he does could negatively effect you).

Also see if he would be open to you helping him with either paying bills, or setting up auto-pay.

As for the "giving out address" - if he can't remember his address does he have an updated driver's license (or state id) with it and can he show that when someone asks his address?

Print the post Back To Top
Author: PSUEngineer Big funky green star, 20000 posts Top Favorite Fools Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305666 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 7/30/2012 3:54 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 7
Dyslexia shouldn't be causing his to forget addresses. It should also not be preventing him from paying his bills on time. You should be looking for another reason why he is having these difficulties.

PSU
dyslexic

Print the post Back To Top
Author: Maraith Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305667 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 8/2/2012 5:31 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
i have written less than three checks in 15 years from her account and vice versa. But the point is I could, if an issue arose.

Good thinking. When my father was in the hospital at the end of his life, my sister had to get him to add her to his checking account in order for her to pay his bills (home bills like electricity and heat, etc.). She had to explain the forms to my dad and then help him sign. She could see the other patient in the room staring at her as if she were forcing this ill old man to sign over his fortune to her. She still remembers how awful it made her feel, that someone could think that was what she was doing.

If we had thought to get one of us kids on his account months earlier, it would have been much easier.

Print the post Back To Top
Author: Windowseat Big funky green star, 20000 posts Top Favorite Fools Feste Award Nominee! Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305668 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 8/2/2012 5:43 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
When my father was in the hospital at the end of his life, my sister had to get him to add her to his checking account in order for her to pay his bills (home bills like electricity and heat, etc.).

My brother just had his name added to Mom's account so he can pay bills if necessary and sign checks for depositing. He's already arranged for some money to be moved from her investment account on a regular basis, and has taken over the tax work.

Nancy

Print the post Back To Top
Author: PaintItBlue Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305669 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 8/2/2012 9:27 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
Maybe there is some way the 2 of you can approach this as a team, so that it works out better? Make it easier for him to do his part of it, or shift responsibilities or something? You sound like you get along better than my ex-BF and I did. Maybe it'll work.

Print the post Back To Top
Author: DrBooa Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 305733 of 308881
Subject: Re: credit and community property Date: 8/14/2012 9:30 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 0
So maybe you need a different approach here. Maybe you need to do something to accommodate his dyslexia. Would he let you take over paying all his bills from his accounts? That way, you could ensure that they are being paid, and they are still being paid from his accounts so you continue to have separate finances. It would be as though he were hiring you to be his business manager, and so you'd handle all the logistics around the bill paying.

That won't help your problem where he can't remember the address, but maybe you can get him to let you do that sort of paperwork and just handle all the finances. Maybe you could also get him to put in a change-of-address at the post office so that all his mail that goes to his parents' house would be forwarded to you, and then you can go in and make the address change for those accounts.


This is what the Boo and I do. I mean, we have combined accounts, but I pay all the bills, every payday. I have online access to all the credit cards, so I don't have to wait for a paper bill to come in the mail to pay them. If he is getting some bills mailed to other addresses, you can do the mail forwarding thing, as some people have mentioned, and as you become aware of other bills getting mailed to those addresses, you can contact the places and give them the updated address (yours) so any future bills get mailed there.

I hope you guys can work it out. I'm pulling for you.


--Booa

Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post Back To Top
UnThreaded | Threaded | Whole Thread (25) | Ignore Thread Prev Thread | Next Thread
Advertisement