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Author: LadyIanna Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 14995  
Subject: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/6/2003 4:03 PM
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Okay...so in the last few days I have....

Did the dishes 4 time or so....
Fed the dogs and the cats and the people....6 times or so...
Fielded and coordinated a rescue operation when my mothers car died on her.....3 different times... (Always at the most in opertune time.)

Moved all my sisters and neices bed pallets and dirty laundry, and tv and dvd and vcr and other crap to the other side of the room, after finishing painting that half, moving all the tools, and large plastic drop cloth, and vacuuming. (Switched both sides of the room)

Vaccumed the bathroom, picked up the wet towels, turned off the lights (a couple dozen times)

Called Direct Loans the other day to see if my payment amount had been changed, and found out they didn't change it for June so I now have to pay the $164. Then my lawyer dropped off the information on my two speeding tickets..(that was a really bad week) $160 for that, that I have to pay by the 14th. Then today in the mail I get a bill from the lawyer for $125 for services rendered. (he used to do it for me for free) and my phone bill is due by the 9th, and i didnt pay it last month so that is about $90. I am due to receive an unemployment check next wed for $147. (1+1=12? I don't think so. *sigh*) AND to top it all of, my dad just asked me to borrow $2 so he can go buy some bread. (me, the person who is unemployed, who is taking care of everything.) Now, I'm good at stretching the dollar, but....I don't think it's gonna stretch that far. So much for the E-fund.

**My dad made a comment this morning that someone ought to get out the juicer and juice up the grapefruit and oranges that were lying around that no one will eat. I mumbled something about "do the dishes Cinderelly, clean the ashes Cinderelly" My sister seemed to think it was funny. Then my neice comes down from being in the shower and asks where breakfast is. My sister said she hadn't made it yet. My neice started whining that she wanted my sister to make it while she was in the shower. My sister commented that it would have been glue by the time she got out. My neice stomps off in a huff. I'm just sitting there.... as my sister comments that she is going into school (she's a teacher) once again on her day off. I ask when she's coming back, she says she doesn't know.

When I got out of bed this morning the kitchen looked like a disaster area. Evidently my neice was hungry when they got home at 11pm and they made her a taco. There was lettuce all over the counter, there were dirty dishes everywhere, there were empty cans sitting about. (instead of tossed in the recycling bin, 2 steps away) I had to pick up, stack up, clean up, wipe up, before I could even think about getting a bowl of cereal for breakfast. (and this was before my neice came down from her shower)**

Okay... so I think...I'll do some painting, since they arent going to be in the room, or even home. I get one half of the wall done. Dad comes home. He says he's gonna take a nap. 15 minutes later, the phone rings...My mom is stranded again. I have to wake up dad, and drop everything I"m doing, (had to quick use up the rest of the paint in the pan, so it didn't dry out and get wasted) and go help him tow the car. Drove my car down so my mother could drive that instead. I figured it was easier than getting another phone call and trying to find someone to go fix her car, or tow her...again.

So the paint pan is sitting in the sink waiting to be cleaned. The wall still needs to be painted, I have no clue where I'm gonna come up with the money to pay all the bills next week. (btw, I'm down to less than a weeks worth of meds.) I have no car. It looks like I'm going to have to use up my e-fund. The bedroom is still not done. (was hoping I could move back in this weekend) My brother hasn't come back to finish the job that he was gonna finish the evening after the morning he started it. He has no transportation, (his truck died) and my car is at my mothers now. My sister is expecting dinner when they get home. Whenever that is. I haven't even taken a shower yet today, cause I figured I was just gonna get dirty painting. .....And...I have no ambition left.

WOW...I just noticed it's 4pm. Where did the day go?

I still need to vacuum the kitchen floor (my dog is shedding like crazy, it seems she was actually two dogs instead of one, one was just all made of winter fur) I guess it's time to start thinking about making dinner, and there's dishes to do, and laundry to wash and...and ...and ...

Anyone know a rich man that would be interested in taking me away to a nice tropical island for a couple weeks???

Lady Ianna.

btw...I did send out two resumes early this week for two part time jobs.


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Author: LadyIanna Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7143 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/6/2003 4:08 PM
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OH...I did forget to mention the one good thing.

If it werent' for the meds, I'd probably be screaming my head off, beating it against the wall, throwing things and breaking them, crying in a heap in the middle of my floor, and god knows what else.


so...I guess I'm doing pretty well.


Lady I....

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Author: impolite Big gold star, 5000 posts Top Favorite Fools Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7144 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/6/2003 4:24 PM
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If it werent' for the meds, I'd probably be screaming my head off, beating it against the wall, throwing things and breaking them, crying in a heap in the middle of my floor, and god knows what else.

Stay on the meds, but keep the blowout.

You are doing two things wrong:

1) Allowing these people to treat you like this.
2) Not beating them about the head when they do.

I recommend you start with #2, as it's much more fun, and ease yourself into #1. Don't make dinner. Right this very second, go into that room and finish painting it. Take all night if you have to. Then, make YOURSELF a nice dinner, take it into said painted-bedroom, and eat by yourself. If anyone makes even ONE snide remark about anything you do, go ballistic. Scream, cry, hell even throw something. Return to the activity they said a remark about, making sure to slam a door or two on the way.

Lather, rinse and repeat until the outbursts are no longer needed.

impolite

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Author: LadyIanna Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7145 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/6/2003 5:49 PM
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I recommend you start with #2, as it's much more fun, and ease yourself into #1. Don't make dinner. Right this very second, go into that room and finish painting it. Take all night if you have to. Then, make YOURSELF a nice dinner, take it into said painted-bedroom, and eat by yourself. If anyone makes even ONE snide remark about anything you do, go ballistic. Scream, cry, hell even throw something. Return to the activity they said a remark about, making sure to slam a door or two on the way.


as satisfying as that sounds...it won't accomplish anything. Been there, done that. And my father wouldn't back me up on any of it. They would just comment again how I am crazy. or as my dad puts it "You're SICK!"

Actually, my neice is making dinner, with a little help and coaxing. I might manage to get my sister to do the dishes later.

I vacuumed the kitchen, cleaned the paint pan and brushes, and went out and brushed the dog, and pulled out another small dog. (hey...anything you can make with dog hair? LBYM?) And there's still alot I missed.

I will work on painting the next wall tomorrow. Then I have to figure out where to come up with the money to rent the carpet cleaner, since this week I'm way in the red. Maybe mom will lend it to me. (And where to put everyone until I get it cleaned.) I still have to get my brother to finish his one little part before I clean the carpet. Oh and get the windows back from the shop and put them back together. (I could actually do that after the carpet is cleaned if I have to)

after dinner, I am taking a bath, putting on my jammies and watching a program on A&E that I've been waiting to watch. (and stealing some of my neices microwave popcorn. She can sue me if she wants.) :^P

As Scarlet would say...."After all... Tomorrow is...another day!"

Lady I, taking baby steps.


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Author: nggCatgoyle Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7146 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/6/2003 5:51 PM
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Lady I,

IMHO, you're doing remarkably well to keep your sanity in an insane situation and environment. Keep on the meds. Let some other bill slide (like the lawyer's, which you should put at the bottom of the stack in any case).

I also agree with impolite that you are enabling everyone else's bad behavior by trying to be all things to all people. Announce that you're going on strike, then DO IT. With good reason, you're sick and tired of being the one responsible for everyone else's dishes, towels, general mess. But as long as you're willing to do the work, Cinderelly, there's absolutely no reason for the evil stepsisters and deadbeat father to change.

Let the house turn into a pig sty if you have to. (It doesn't sound like it will take very long.)

Create a small space for yourself and keep it neat and clean to your satisfaction. Take a few dishes, towels, etc. and declare them yours, move them to your space and keep them clean.

Quit cooking for everyone. If they're hungry, they'll manage to find something to eat.

If there are no clean towels/sheets/clothes, well, they can figure out how to work the washing machine and dryer.

If someone needs assistance, tough. Let them sucker someone else into doing it for them.

Get out of the house for at least a little while every day. Don't tell anyone where you're going. Just leave.

Start looking for a job, part-time at least, doing almost anything. Don't be picky. Right now, you're working very hard for no pay. Why not do the same thing for someone who will appreciate and pay you for it. With some income, paying bills will be much easier! ;-)

The only way you're going to be able to find time for yourself and do the things YOU need to do is to quit trying to do it all. There are 4 adults living in the house, ostensibly anyway. Unfortunately, 3 of them seem to have regressed to toddlerhood. Bossy, demanding, completely self-centered. Time for you to turn the tables, adopt some of those behaviors yourself, and give them a taste of their own medicine!

Your productivity and your sanity very likely depend on it. Of course you can keep ranting about it here, but it will be a lot more fun and rewarding if you're achieving some behavior modification in the process! Good luck with a tough challenge.

Cori

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Author: ishtarastarte Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7147 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/6/2003 6:46 PM
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(hey...anything you can make with dog hair? LBYM?) And there's still alot I missed.



Yep, Yarn:

http://www.mdnpd.com/pd/why.htm

Ishtar
(spin or dye!)

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Author: InLivingColor Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7149 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/7/2003 3:53 PM
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Anyone know a rich man that would be interested in taking me away to a nice tropical island for a couple weeks???
I am not rich, not a man, and couldn't afford a tropical island. All I have is a couch and (some) floor space. But I would put you up for a couple of weeks, anyway.
As for your family telling you "you're SICK", well, when folks say that to me, I come back with, "Yeah, I'm doctor-certified, even. What's YOUR excuse?"
I'll second the suggestions from the others, and give one more: make lists. Lots of lists. No editorializing, just the facts. Lists of what you do for them each day. Lists of what you need for yourself, and are not getting. Next time anybody complains about what you did NOT do, hand them the list(s) of what you HAVE done. Don't say anything, just hand over the list.
I'm InLivingColor

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Author: morgaine1 Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7150 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/7/2003 4:28 PM
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I don't have any other advice, just


{{{{{LadyIanna}}}}}

I concur with the "get out of the house" suggestions. How about frequenting your local library? Anybody asks where you've been, tell them it's none of their business. (It isn't!)

cathy.mn
you really, really need to get away from those people....

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Author: 7karen Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7151 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/7/2003 5:50 PM
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i think if i'd had the niece ask me where breakfast was, i'd have wanted to toss her a grapefruit...

seriously, maybe this is the sort of thing it might be less difficult to get her to help with (since the reward is fairly quick, & edible).

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Author: LadyIanna Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7152 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/7/2003 8:18 PM
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seriously, maybe this is the sort of thing it might be less difficult to get her to help with (since the reward is fairly quick, & edible).

actually, I might have gotten her to help had my sister not been there, but I have to be careful what I say, because my sister will flip out.

She seems to have this thing about anyone telling "HER CHILD" what to do.

It's an insecurity thing. ( I think based on being a single mother and unsure of herself.)

I'm working on it. Managed to get through a large stack of newspapers that I wanted to sort through today. *YES,I AM A PACKRAT!*

Made orange chicken with brocolli and rice for dinner. (have I mentioned that I really like to cook?)

AND my brother showed up out of the blue to do a bit more on the ceiling and chimney that he is fixing for me. One more coat and it may be done.


So, I'm making progress, just very slowly.

Lady I.



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Author: greet Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7153 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/7/2003 8:46 PM
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My question:

Why do you worry about what any of these people need or want? Is it reciprocal? Do they often express concern about you?

Another question:

Why do you feel obligated to do anything for them that they can do themselves? You aren't married to them, you aren't romantically involved with them, and they aren't helpless children. They won't learn to be competent adults if you do all the daily maintenance for them. And don't hand us that stuff (;o) about "It drives me nuts to see wet towels on the chairs and the floor!" Pick your favorite chair and remove it from the wet towel area.
If it's because you're unemployed and your dad works, well, your sister and your niece aren't part of that deal.

You don't have to be nasty, you don't have to make announcements. Just change what you're doing. There are some boundary issues here that need a lot of work, and since they're clueless, you have to work on it yourself.

I used to spend my weekend doing all the laundry. My DH is a grown man who is fully capable of doing his own. So guess what? Now he does. I take care of my own clothes, he takes care of his, and since he uses so many more towels than I do, he takes care of that. I didn't have a tantrum; I just quietly told him that it wasn't fair, and I wouldn't be doing his. He bellyached when he ran out of clothes, and thought I was being abusive until I reminded him of the inequity and reminded him that I'd given fair warning. Again, I spoke quietly and calmly, and wasn't nasty at all. It worked. It worked in that instance, anyway, but I still have a long, long way to go.

I come from a family with a tendency towards alcoholism on one side (my grandmother died of it) and ADD on the other, and believe me, we're a co-dependent lot. It's taken work to get this far, and I have a long way to go. Boundaries are a big issue, and doing too much for other people is a biggie, too. It takes constant practice to build up new habits, but it can be done.

Are there any ACA meetings in your area (Adult Children of Alcoholics)? You don't have to actually come from an alcoholic family to benefit from them. Behavior patterns can be the same for many dysfunctional families, regardless of the dysfunction, y'know, and the meetings are free. It's like therapy without the insurance and money hassle.

Wishing you luck and grit,

greet.
I'll shut up now.



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Author: LadyIanna Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7154 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/7/2003 9:25 PM
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Well I feed the dogs, because I don't want them to starve. It's not their fault.

My dad is retired and is somewhere in his late 70's. hmm or is that early 80's (he always says he's the same age as Mickey Mouse.)

I've always been taught that you take care of your family. I am a nice person and I do like doing things for people.

I dislike wet towels on floor and furniture because I don't like to see furniture ruined. I take care of things. I'm not a toss and buy new person. I have antiques. My dad has antiques. I have clothing and shoes that I have had for 20 years or more. I take care of them.

I dislike fighting with my sister. Call me crazy, but I have spent years of living with fighting and screaming. I have also learned what I can do and can't do. You cannot teach a blind man to see. In all the years I've known my dad, (my entire life) he has never changed any of his habits.

He has made comments to my neice the last few days about picking up stuff. (She'll listen to him.) He's tired of tripping over things. It takes him a while to make a change. I once suggested we move the dining room table and he said no..... a few weeks or a month later, he suggested to me the same move. My dad was an only child. My mother one of 2 children. They are used to getting their way. I am the youngest of 5. I am used to compromising, or making way. I am the type of person who likes to do things for people. I am also somewhat of a control freak, in that I dislike it when people abuse "things" that if taken care of could last a lifetime. Especially when those things are mine. Which alot of the dishes, pots and pans etc are.

So...maybe I am wrong in just letting most of it go, but... If I spend all my time arguing, stressing, fretting, and fighting, and trying to force people to have manners that they don't even know exist.... I will be the one that's upset and stressed out and they won't even notice.

Things will be better when I am back in my bedroom, and can get back to making a concerted effort to finding a job. I just need to go with the flow for a while. Just think of me as the tortoise instead of the hare.

Lady I, thinks you can't change a leapords spots. (always thought I was adopted or switched at birth in the hospital.)



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Author: joycets Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7159 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/8/2003 12:14 AM
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{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{LadyIanna}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

jts

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Author: joycets Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7160 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/8/2003 12:18 AM
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Some years ago (I know it had to be,because we had cable & we've been here without it for around 12 years) I saw an article on spinning dogs hair into yarn. Helps if the dog sheds a lot. Now, I haven't done this, but I'm sure there's references to this on the net.

joycets

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Author: joycets Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7161 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/8/2003 12:25 AM
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Lady I, thank you for sharing your dad's age.. I was about to ask.
The situation has a lot of parallels to the scene I am going to put myself in when I get back to Ohio on father's day, with the minor (?) exception that I don't have to live there, and have at least one "escape hatch" in town if I can't take it.

but--people reading this need to understand that at a certain age, you can't expect people to change or do it themselves.

I support you & hope you share your victories along with your rants.

joycets

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Author: RiverCityFool Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7164 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/8/2003 4:55 AM
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If I spend all my time arguing, stressing, fretting, and fighting, and trying to force people to have manners that they don't even know exist.... I will be the one that's upset and stressed out and they won't even notice.

That's true. But it's also true that if you keep acting like the maid and caretaker for all of them, they'll keep treating you like dirt.

I know it's hard to live in chaos, with unappreciative people sucking up your energy. And I know it's hard to imagine a way out -- but I wish you could at least take some time and get away.

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Author: impolite Big gold star, 5000 posts Top Favorite Fools Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7165 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/9/2003 10:19 AM
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as satisfying as that sounds...it won't accomplish anything. Been there, done that. And my father wouldn't back me up on any of it. They would just comment again how I am crazy. or as my dad puts it "You're SICK!"

I took a while to respond to this, because I was trying to think of a way to make it sound nice, couch it in a compliment, even. But a fact is as a fact does....

What exactly are you accomplishing by NOT screaming, shouting, losing your temper?

You are not accomplishing anything but making yourself more anxious, more stressed, more depressed. It's obvious that the current course of action (or rather, inaction) isn't working. So stop doing it - change course.

They may think that you are crazy, but people generally leave crazy people alone. Problem solved! You can go about your crazy day, with no interference.

I used to just roll-over and let things happen to me, try to keep the peace by allowing people to use me. NOT ANY MORE. It doesn't work. It takes a while, but people eventually WILL learn that "no" means "no", that you WON'T be there servant, and that they need to take care of things themselves. You can talk to them about it, they can even agree that they should pick up after themselves/leave you alone/get the hell out of your way, but if you keep doing it for them, they'll keep letting you. So just stop doing it.

The reason that you keep trying to make things better is because you are an absolute sweetheart. But you are wasting that energy on able adults that should be taking care of themselves, thankyouverymuch. us that energy for yourself (you are having a rough go of things, so focus on yourself), and if you have any extra energy lying around, then go volunteer at a pet adoption agency, or a home for battered women (they always need babysitters, people to help garden, whatever) - THEY deserve you, not the people who are currently taking advantage of you.

You are worth far too much to waste you time, energy and essence of a bunch of slovenly people-users.

impolite

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Author: sofaking6 Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7166 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/9/2003 7:14 PM
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Anyone know a rich man that would be interested in taking me away to a nice tropical island for a couple weeks???

No, but if you want, I'll dress up like you and stand in the middle of the house and scream, "EVERYONE OUT OUT OUT!!!" until the place is empty.

6

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Author: sofaking6 Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7167 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/9/2003 7:16 PM
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They would just comment again how I am crazy. or as my dad puts it "You're SICK!"


If they're going to call you crazy anyway, might as well pee on the beds.

6

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Author: magiquedarkayne Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7168 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/9/2003 11:16 PM
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If they're going to call you crazy anyway, might as well pee on the beds.

6


ROFLMAO,6 if you werent already one of my faves this would have done it(grin). I have been told from time to time that I am "eccentric , but in a good way". Always try to give the customer what they expect darlin

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Author: GreenEyedLady Two stars, 250 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7170 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/11/2003 6:58 AM
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> as satisfying as that sounds...it won't accomplish anything. Been there, done that. And my father wouldn't back me up on any of it. They would just comment again how I am crazy. or as my dad puts it "You're SICK!"


Why not say "yes I am but at least I am trying to do something about it" and turn that around as a reason to ask for contibutions toward the cost of your therapist and/or meds? Especially since you are spending so much time looking after them, when you really need to be finding and keeping a job that would otherwise have provided insurance to handle these expenses for yourself.

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Author: LadyIanna Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7171 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/11/2003 1:34 PM
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Because, no one knows I am taking the meds. If they did, they would just throw it in my face.

Understanding the dynamics of my family is incredibly difficult. Even I don't understand it myself.

Just this morning my dad was bitching about my sister to my brother. Instead of bitching to my sister.

Anyway, I've mixed up 4 loaves of bread this morning, because we are close to being out, and it's cheaper than going out and buying some.

My neice has announced to me that my other neices are coming down this friday to attend her recital and are staying over night. They will either have to sleep on the floor, or sleep in the truck camper out back.

I've moved my neice into the room (closet) I was in, and my sister has moved herself to the fold out couch in the library, that I finally got cleared off. I'm sleeping on the air mattress, but at least, I know that I don't have to move them out to work on my room.

Welp, I'm off to check the mail to see if my UE check came in, then off to Walmart to get my meds refilled, and buy a few groceries.

Lady I, the inch worm, inching slowly along. 8^)

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Author: joycets Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7173 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/11/2003 7:26 PM
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but again, I say, (devil's advocate?) if lady I has some interest in keeping the items valuable that she expects to have some future with (house, inherited antiques, childhood memory items etc), it is her job to make the decision to try.
Without losing her SELF in the process of course.

joycets

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Author: LadyIanna Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7175 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/12/2003 5:20 PM
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but again, I say, (devil's advocate?) if lady I has some interest in keeping the items valuable that she expects to have some future with (house, inherited antiques, childhood memory items etc), it is her job to make the decision to try.
Without losing her SELF in the process of course.

joycets


Thank YOU! Finally someone understands. Not that I don't value all the other suggestions I've gotten, but...(and you knew there was a but..) It's difficult to find the line between doing what is right and doing what is needed, and doing to keep the peace, and getting taken advantage of. (I guess that's a box not a line. ;-)

Anyway, my mother called yesterday twice, because she wanted to talk to my sister. (no mom, she's not home yet, yes mom I'll give her the message, no mom I don't know when she's going to be home. NO mom I don't know if she loaned you money back in December to pay cash for your rent, when you told the landlord not to cash that check, and you should have gotten a receipt or at least gotten the check back and I don't know why they cashed a check last week that you wrote in January.) (No mom, I don't know why your BCBS isnt paying your medical bills like they are supposed to. NO I don't remember the date that we called and had a conference call with you Dr's office and the insurance lady. Didn't you write it down and put it in your folder? No, I don't know what you did with the folder that you wrote all your notes in. ) No mom, I haven't talked to my brother since yesterday, I don't know where he is, If I do see him I will give him your message..... Mom...Mom...MOM!!! We are just sitting down to dinner, and I'd really like to eat it hot. Okay mom.... bye mom.) *MUMBLE GRUMBLE* {And this is my problem, because??? *MUMBLE GRUMBLE*

I got the bread made, and the dishes done, and bought some groceries, and made dinner, and my neice actually sat down at the dinner table and ate with us. *boggle* ACTUALLY TURNED OFF THE TV AND SAT DOWN AT THE TABLE *boggle* It was actually quite pleasant. She had a giggle fit, because my Dad told her his grandfather only had one tooth, and would eat peas with his knife.

Tomorrow...sometime.... my other two neices are going to show up. I still don't know for sure what room they are sleeping in. I got up this morning, made myself some breakfast, and came back into my room to do some painting, and discovered that my neices cat had messed all over my drop cloth (plastic). I had to clean that up. The dog had messed in the kitchen yesterday. And I found a bunch of paper towels sitting on the floor in the kitchen when I got up this morning. It looked like it was to soak up something, but I don't know what it was. I guess my sister left them there.

Last night my sister, came home an hour or more late, and ate the dinner that I had left in the oven for her, sat down on the couch and watched tv till it was time for bed. (I went to bed before her, I was exhausted.) Told her to call my mother, she didn't. Told her there was left over french toast that I had made for breakfast that she could eat for breakfast the next day, all she had to do was pop them in the toaster. (she didn't) (she confessed to me she would have been home earlier but she sat down and started playing a computer game at work and couldn't leave because she was doing really well.)

Today...I got 1 & 1/2 walls painted in my room. I'm just waiting on the final finish coat of spackle that my brother is putting on, and the final sanding before I go any further. Finally got the windows back from the hardware store. (it took them 4 weeks to fix 3 windows.)*GRRR* Dad says he's going to paint them tonight. Then I have to put all of them back in. After that, I can clean the carpet, and start moving stuff back in. Woo Hoo!

My computer has been quitting on me. The fan died on the power unit, so I think it's over heating. (which means I should get my butt off before I lose this whole post)

I'm making baby steps.

Lady I, toddling along.






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Author: blford Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 7176 of 14995
Subject: Re: Fate is against me? Long Rant Date: 6/12/2003 5:38 PM
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Hey Lady I,

My computer has been quitting on me. The fan died on the power unit, so I think it's over heating. (which means I should get my butt off before I lose this whole post)

Ahhh!! You're gonna fry that poor thing! ;-)

Take the case off and put a floor fan in front of it until you can replace the power supply.

You can get ps's most anywhere now, Best Buy, Circuit City, etc. Make sure you buy at least a 300 watt ps.

A couple of examples:

http://snurl.com/1kej

http://snurl.com/1kel

Pay attention to whether your Case is ATX or Micro ATX, it matters!

Try this for help finding the right ps.

http://snurl.com/1ker (They also have quality products)

TURBO-COOL MODEL: 300 ATX/ATX12V Costs $60;

http://snurl.com/1keq

A great explanation (one of my fav sites) of how important a good ps is and a comparison of 21 different products.

http://www.tomshardware.com/howto/20021021/

HTH

ßillƒ

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