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Forget global warming, the West Nile virus, and the Creature from the Black Lagoon--killer coons are on the loose in Massachusetts:

One night, about 10 years ago, my wife wakes me up and tells me a racoon is trying to get into the bedroom. I, sleepy, said "uh huh" and rolled over. She says "I'm getting out of here, and jumps out of bed and runs out of the room.

I rolled back over, opened my eyes, and put on my glasses. There was this racoon standing outside the window (it was open, and nothing but a screen keeping it out) and sniffing the interior.

Now, my house at the time was a 1 1/2 story that sat in the woods. My bedroom was upstairs, but the window opened onto the kitchen roof. There were several trees overhanging the roof, and this 'coon had just waltzed onto the roof. At the time, my oldest child was about 6 months old or so.

So, I got out of bed and walked over to the window. This coon wasn't a bit scared. He knew I was there, and just kept sniffing and snuffling (he was curious). I stood not 6 inches from him and he didn't budge. I said "BOO!". He jumped a little bit, but otherwise didn't move.

I cranked the window closed, hitting him in the butt. He didn't yield.

So, I went and grabbed a gun, came back, took the screen out of the window, and shot him.

I like the wildlife, but they have to display a healthy respect for us and keep their distance. I shot the 'coon because I had to consider the possibility that - if it had no fear of us - it might just come in some night, and I had a baby in the house.
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