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Author: rackled Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 71913  
Subject: Goodbye Date: 11/1/2008 2:58 PM
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I didnt know exactly where to post this; I thought there was a more general forum for the collection of hidden gems members but I couldnt find one.

I wanted to say that I will be leaving Hidden Gems, not for any reason related to Hiddem Gems itself, but for health reasons.

I a little background: I am 26 years and since the age of 19 I have been dealing with a cancer called Ewing's Sarcoma. I have gone through the most aggressive chemo therapy possible, an absolute torture, because I am young -- it is nothing like adult chemotherapy.

Anyway, about six months ago I discovered that the cancer had recurred for the third time, and my doctor, the national expert at Stanford (at Stanford) in no uncertain terms said that I was going to die, that I needed to make use of the time I have, that I had nine months approximately before becoming heavily symptomatic. It seems that time is fast approaching. The cancer is extremely aggressive and I am receiving no treatment, simply because there are no more treatments that can be given to me. Each time the cancer appeared my prognosis decreased : from 90% at first, to 33% the second time, to zero now. She was never seen anyone survive and eventually she says I will just suffocate -- the cancer spread to me lungs. I suppose that some people must lead hard/shitty leaves in order to average out those fortunate enough to lead good ones. That is life and I accept it. I just wish that my life had been more complete. It truly saddens me that I will have to say goodbye to so many things, among them my mother, my friends, and my dog that loves me.

I originally joined Hidden Gems for precisely this reason, as a source of interaction of others while I was going through these hard times and as an exercise in mental stimulation to keep my mind of things.

I met many people along the way that I liked, although I am not sure I was really liked by some because I have strong views.

I dont know if you recall, but I was a big advocate of DNDN, which turned out to be a disaster (robbed) for precisely this reason -- because I firmly believed that immunutherapies represented the future of cancer treatment, an opportunity to eliminate the suffering of chemotherapy treatment and to treat cancer because in its most inchoate stages before it became acute. It is my great hope that if the world survives all the horrors I perceive that this sort of treatment will become the future.

So, I am left with the unfortunate situation of taking my money out of the market at the worst of times -- no five to ten year horizon for me -- in order to be able to use that money to do the things that I want to do in the time that I have left.

I am ending my Hidden Gems and SA subscriptions effective immediately in order to save money for those things I want to do so I will not be able to read any possible responses. However, if you wish to reach me and express anything, my email is devon.rackle@gmail.com.

I thank you all for your friendship and mental stimulation. I dont think I have anymore to say. I always prayed that if I was to be taken and to suffer, that it would not be in vain, that others would lead happier lives because of it. I hope that proves to be the case. But in the end, I am an anonymous person among billions of people and the world will go on without me.

So, I bid you adiue and God be with you. I am very emotional right now but I often am nowadays.
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