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Author: Windowseat Big funky green star, 20000 posts Top Favorite Fools Feste Award Nominee! Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 7894  
Subject: Halfway Home Date: 7/1/2007 2:54 PM
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This month marks the end of my fifth year in remission. The doctors said they like to see ten years before they even think of using the word "cured" and many of them will never use it. There's never any way to be sure that all the cancer was caught. All anyone can do, at this point, is keep on living your life and keep on hoping that there won't be an occurance.

It was a trip I didn't want to make. No one wants to. The pain, the frustration, the fear all made the journey a miserable one. And every time I read that another person has died of cancer, or has been diagnosed with cancer, I want to hit something. But what I want to hit has many faces, and hides in the dark.

I've learned a lot about myself. I've learned that I can stand up to the larger challenges, and I'd always wondered whether I could. And I learned that laughing during the hardest parts does indeed help. It doesn't make the bad parts go away, but it does make them bearable.

Life goes on. My job collapsed shortly after I finished treatments, and after a long, grim search I found a better one. Friends on the boards, friends in real life, have died, some of them of cancer. Tears have been wept over this board and what people have said about the disease that has marked them.

To those who have shared my journey, thank you. It would have been a harder struggle without you. To those who have written of a journey, whether it was your own or that of someone you love, whether it was on this board or through email, thank you. I know how hard it is to open your heart during this time.

Halfway home. Five years before I can think that there might not be a recurrance. I hope you'll continue to share my journey, and allow me to share yours.

Nancy
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