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Author: ishtarastarte Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 3721  
Subject: Re: rant/whine/vent/I need to move out Date: 9/3/2002 10:40 PM
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Have any of you all run into this before? Aside from moving out (which I will be checking the ads just in hope that someone wants a non-rent-paying-massage-therapist as a roommate!), do you all have any advice? Any other routes I could take in trying to expand my mom's horizons? ...it's really my mom's issue. My dad and brothers are cool with it, my sister bitches to my mom, my mom bitches to me for both of them. My sister won't talk to me about this at all. I tried.



I haven't dealt with it personally, as my mother is open minded and understands me.

But, I've dealt with it through students and cohorts and my advice is to DROP IT. You will NEVER, repeat NEVER get her to understand you, especially if the only time you talk about it is when she's upset. The only thing you accomplish by this is upsetting her, and others in your family.

Your belief system is so far outside her experience, that she can't see it as valid. This is NOT a failing in YOU, it's a failing in HER, but YOU CAN'T CHANGE HER.

As to why she seems schizo about you, she's trying to "love the sinner, hate the sin."

If you can't move out, then you have to bury any visible form of your beliefs. You want a pentacle? Go find a store that sells seashells and get a dried starfish or sanddollar (especially since there is a Christian version of the symbolism of a sanddollar.)

You are now in HIDING. You won't have to be for the rest of your life, but do what they want while you're there. Heck, start going to church. A pagan/Wiccan is eclectic and can find wisdom even within CHRISTIAN forms. Pretend it's the Burning Times and you have to hide to save your life, and the lives of your coven. It's not that hard to maintain your own beliefs within another framework. The pentacle? It's the Five Wounds of Christ, Mom! It was used as protection symbolism in Catholic cathedrals throughout Europe!

AFTER you've moved out on your own, live as you choose. Don't explain ANYTHING, as it will ALL be used against you, UNLESS you are asked sincerly to explain something.

It sucks, but you won't have peace unless you do this.

Ishtar
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