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Author: robertoluna Three stars, 500 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 5113  
Subject: Re: Update and Question Date: 4/8/2004 10:05 PM
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He's a difficult child to discipline in general because neither rewards or punishments are effective, so those types of things are out. Is there *anything* I can do to impress upon him that he should stop getting things wrong on purpose???????

I think by this you mean "typical" rewards and punishments don't matter, right? The consequence of his misbehavior (and that's what it is) during lessons resulted in his losing his free afternoons. That's a punishment that got through to him.

We have one that does a similar thing--he was having emotional meltdowns whenever his mother told him that he missed something. Then he was "too upset" to think clearly and made the day miserable for everyone. We've found that generally the best thing is to find a way to make it his problem. Sometimes that means sending him to his room so that he is the only miserable one, usually it means school takes longer and eats into his time.

One question, though, what does it matter to you if he gets things wrong--especially if you're sure he knows the answer? If he knows the answer, hasn't he learned the material? We are trained that getting good grades is important, and we're afraid we'll look bad if our kids don't do well. This is homeschool! What does it matter if he doesn't get "good grades?"

Perhaps if you let it go for a while, he'll decide on his own that it's pretty stupid to miss things on purpose. If you feel you have to do something, make him do extra busy work related to the parts he missed, maybe write essays on them (if that's age appropriate). Make him copy sentences (gasp!) on the topics he missed to "practice his penmanship."

My guess is that he's subconsciously doing it because he knows it will drive you crazy. The most effective thing may be for you just not to care. But that may be easier said than done. :)

Bob
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