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Hi Kathy,

I completely understand what you are going through with Darka. I faced the same situation with my Lavender. She peed on floors, carpets, tables, sofas, anywhere she happened to be when she decided she needed to go. I worked with her for nearly a year, trying all the suggested behavior modification training and drugs, but nothing worked. I finally gave up and put her outdoors, providing as comfortable a shelter as possible for her. (She's also declawed, BTW, although she doesn't seem to know it, or at least it doesn't make her any less aggressive with other cats.)

I know putting Darka outside isn't an option, since coyotes would quickly put an end to her (even if she did have claws). Do you have any place that you can keep her that's enclosed? A porch would be ideal, but a bathroom or other small room would do as well. You probably won't be able to train her enough that you'll ever feel you can trust her to have full access to your space again, but you could let her have some supervised time outside the enclosed space when you know she's recently peed. Confined to living in a small environment, she's more likely to be compliant about using the box.

It's very frustrating, and I do understand your feelings of not wanting her in your house anymore (or at least not to have the run of the house and freedom to pee wherever she pleases). You're right, it's nearly impossible to get someone to take a cat with "inappropriate elimination" problems. The best you might be able to hope for is that someone else could provide her with a space like a barn to live in, if you don't want to try confinement in your environment.

Assuming none of those choices are possible, and you really can't take it anymore, I think the kindest thing to do would be, as you suggested, to take her to the vet and send her to the Bridge while you hold her. I wouldn't just drop her at the shelter to wait on death row in a cage, scared and confused. Older cats don't usually have a very good chance at being adopted, especially not those with peeing problems.

It's a tough situation, and my heart goes out to you.

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