So I asked this female from HR to accompany me to dinner and a movie last week.

Her respose, "sure we can go together, like a friend's night out".

When I then told her I wasn't interested anymore and I'd probably find something else to do, she got all weird.

Now I'm told the gossip is I'm a total tool and no longer welcome to flirt with the chicks in the HR department.

I hate dating.

Joelsenior

"Now I'm told the gossip is I'm a total tool and no longer welcome to flirt with the chicks in the HR department."

Cheer up. You only had one shot anyway. Sounds like classic Cheetah Theory. Dating from a group of women is similar to cheetahs hunting on the Serengeti. Big cats select their target and make their move, scattering the herd in the process. Same with dating. In the process of making your selection (“kill”), you establish yourself with the rest of the group (scattering it), thus ruining your chances with a different member. That's why the initial selection process is so important. One shot. Make it count.

dh

Dating from a group of women is similar to cheetahs hunting on the Serengeti. Big cats select their target and make their move, scattering the herd in the process. Same with dating. In the process of making your selection (“kill”), you establish yourself with the rest of the group (scattering it), thus ruining your chances with a different member.

Wow, Joelsenior...if you can lick yourself in the places a cheetah can, you won't need a date ;-)



J.P.

Her respose, "sure we can go together, like a friend's night out".

When I then told her I wasn't interested anymore and I'd probably find something else to do, she got all weird.


This was your mistake.
You should have gone with her as just friends, pretended that's all you wanted. She'd either have been dissapointed and made a play for you, or she'd have been cool with it and not blown your chances with all the other HR chicks.

You fool.

JB
Expert at the work dating thing.

Wow, Joelsenior...if you can lick yourself in the places a cheetah can, you won't need a date ;-)

J.P. -=====================================================


I conur!
I'd never have to leave the house

Joelsenior

You should have gone with her as just friends, pretended that's all you wanted. etc. etc.

JB ================================================================


What are you a chick? with all the game playing.

If I follow your advice I would have ended paying for dinner
and a movie for 2 and going home and spanking it.

My way I only pay for 1.

Joelsenior

If I follow your advice I would have ended paying for dinner
and a movie for 2 and going home and spanking it.

No,no. If she really just wanted to be friends she'd have made a dive for the check. Never let him pay unless you want him to think you'll (eventually) put out.

Twee

What are you a chick? with all the game playing.


No. Being able to beat them at their own game does not make you a chick.

If I follow your advice I would have ended paying for dinner
and a movie for 2 and going home and spanking it.

My way I only pay for 1.


If you're just going as friends why would you pay for everything?

This is the 21st century, not the 18th. If you're going out with a chick and she says "this is just as friends" then you make her pay for half. At least. This way, even if it turns into something more, you still save money. Bonus.

JB

No,no. If she really just wanted to be friends she'd have made a dive for the check. Never let him pay unless you want him to think you'll (eventually) put out.

Twee

===============================================================


Only a total jackass would let a chick pay for a date.
Even if you weren't getting laid later.

It's just uncool

Joelsenior, old-school

ps we are always thinking you'll (eventually) put out. That's why
we talk to you in the first place

Don't crap where you eat. It's bad for business.


RJ

Don't crap where you eat. It's bad for business.

RJ ===================================================


Which is why I crap at home and always eat out.
Joelsenior

Which is why I crap at home and always eat out.

It means don't date women you work with. After you are done banging them you still have to work with them.

It's like having a piece of toilet paper stuck to your shoe.



RJ

It means don't date women you work with. After you are done banging them you still have to work with them.

It's like having a piece of toilet paper stuck to your shoe.

RJ ===============================================================


Oh.

I don't really work with them as they are chicks doing new employee
orientations, filling out HMO paperwork, passing out company
shirts, bothering people to donate to United Way, and such

And I am doing real work managing the computer nerds.

Joelsenior, middle management

It means don't date women you work with. After you are done banging them you still have to work with them.

It's like having a piece of toilet paper stuck to your shoe.

One of my ex-bfs got me a job at the company he works for. He's right down the hall from my office.

We started dating when we were both back at a different company.

Twee

Your first mistake was asking out a bird in HR. They have all the privileged info on everyone at work, so they think they are smarter than the rest. "Human resources", a true oxymoron.
Mistake #2 was not in accepting the just friends gambit. Then you could have turned the tables by going to some ordinary place to eat (fast food, or just plain) and then seeing a bad flick, or some exploitive non-chick one (not porno, that's over the top). If she had a sense of humor, maybe then she would treat you like a human being. If no humor, then you would have at least communicated that you could parry with them on an equal basis. Would have cost $20 ?

PS, when HR chicks aren't talking about everybody else, they're stabbing each other in the back.

*JR*

Your first mistake was asking out a bird in HR....

JR ===============================================================


1. All chicks think they're smarter than any guy

2. Going out with a chick "just as friends" was ok pre-marriage
(which was like 20 years ago). Now I have enough friends

3. How is going a cheap resturant and seeing a non-chick flick
turning the tables? I do that every first date.


Joelsenior

ps Bird? shouldn't you have said "humour" too
pps yes I have 2nd dates, smartass

So I asked this female from HR to accompany me to dinner and a movie last week.

Her respose, "sure we can go together, like a friend's night out".

She actually sound kind of nice. She cared enough about your feelings to find a way to tell you it was no-go in the romance department without rejecting you completely as a person.

Believe me, it's not very easy to shoot a guy down without ending up feeling like a total bitch.

Twee

She actually sound kind of nice. She cared enough about your feelings to find a way to tell you it was no-go in the romance department without rejecting you completely as a person.

Twee =============================================================


I'd rather she just said no. The "friends" thing always confuses me.

Do you chicks really like hanging out with guys you don't want to
screw or are you just trying not to seem bitchy?

Joelsenior

I'd rather she just said no. The "friends" thing always confuses me.

I'll try to clear it up: "Friends" is when you spend time with someone and are nice to them without an ulterior motive.

Do you chicks really like hanging out with guys you don't want to
screw or are you just trying not to seem bitchy?

We really like it. I actually have a very good male friend that I WISH I wanted to screw because he'd be a fantastic boyfriend.

Twee

Do you chicks really like hanging out with guys you don't want to
screw or are you just trying not to seem bitchy?


When chicks say they want to be friends, that means you are free to keep taking them out, paying for dinners and movies and everything else, and they are free to never give you any sex.


It's a scam. I wish I had some "friends" like that too.


RJ

JS,

you know you aint getting any anyways....so why not shop around.

why be lovers on the first date? Why not see what you are getting into...after all the last time you rushed in did not work out....

How about taking your time? Of course if you take your time you cant call a woman a beach.....you'd have to be a nice guy.....literally....

I know I am asking too much.....

db

When chicks say they want to be friends, that means you are free to keep taking them out, paying for dinners and movies and everything else, and they are free to never give you any sex.


I don't think so. The last female friend...let's see how it goes....date I had...I paid for lunch...she paid for dinner...and frankly dinner was a much better meal.

I had a better time when she paid.

I did not get laid...but I still would have happily gone out with her.

Seriously I forgot my viagra.....LOL

db

It means don't date women you work with. After you are done banging them you still have to work with them.

Not if they're contractors, which HR chicks rarely are. Do your dumpster diving in IT, Joelsenior.

6

Do you chicks really like hanging out with guys you don't want to
screw or are you just trying not to seem bitchy?

We are trying to avoid being stalked and killed in case you're psycho. i.e. not to seem bitchy.

6

When I then told her I wasn't interested anymore and I'd probably find something else to do, she got all weird.

Now I'm told the gossip is I'm a total tool and no longer welcome to flirt with the chicks in the HR department.

You did the right thing.

Of course, you shouldn't ask co-workers out if you're not willing to be gossiped about, and it goes without saying that you only get one target per department at a time. Ok, unless you're me and the HR chick you discreetly ask out says, "No, dumbass, not me...HER!" indicating her next-cube neighbor.

Anyhow, worst case, you've lost nothing but the esteem of some people whose opinions don't matter. More likely, even if they think you were being a jerk, on some sub-conscious level they'll respect you for sticking to your guns.


Swish

I'll try to clear it up: "Friends" is when you spend time with someone and are nice to them without an ulterior motive.
We really like it. I actually have a very good male friend that I WISH I wanted to screw because he'd be a fantastic boyfriend.

Twee ============================================================


1. Why bother? I have enough friends
2. That is why he keeps hanging around, he waiting for you to come around to his way of thinking

Joelsenior

you know you aint getting any anyways....so why not shop around.

why be lovers on the first date? Why not see what you are getting into...after all the last time you rushed in did not work out....

How about taking your time? Of course if you take your time you cant call a woman a beach.....you'd have to be a nice guy.....literally....

I know I am asking too much.....

db
=============================================================

1a. If you say so
1b. I thought that's what I'm doing
2a. It separates the sluts from the nice chicks
2b. That is why I'll wait as long as 3 dates
2c. I don't know what you're talking about
3a. Okay
3b. I would never call a chick a "beach"
3c. I am

eff off
Joelsenior

<<If I follow your advice I would have ended paying for dinner
and a movie for 2 and going home and spanking it.>>

If you had gone as friends, there would be no reason to pay her way.

Incidentally, I'd never date a man who referred to women as "chicks". Your mileage may vary.

Kas

Not if they're contractors, which HR chicks rarely are. Do your dumpster diving in IT, Joelsenior.

6
===============================================================

Sure, like that will ever happen.

After 20 years in nerdville I can count on one hand the
number of acceptable chicks I have seen in IT

Joelsenior

We are trying to avoid being stalked and killed in case you're psycho. i.e. not to seem bitchy.

6
=================================================================


Finally a real answer.
Thanks

Joelsenior

Anyhow, worst case, you've lost nothing but the esteem of some people whose opinions don't matter. More likely, even if they think you were being a jerk, on some sub-conscious level they'll respect you for sticking to your guns.


Swish ===========================================================


Plus they fear me because I understand and can correct their
computer thingie screw-ups

Joelsenior, computer genius

ps when compared to the dippy chicks in HR

Incidentally, I'd never date a man who referred to women as "chicks". Your mileage may vary.

Kas
===============================================================


Why not? Use only as directed

Joelsenior

Incidentally, I'd never date a man who referred to women as "chicks".

I bet Joelsenior doesn't call women "chicks" in front of his dates.

- KG

<<Incidentally, I'd never date a man who referred to women as "chicks". Your mileage may vary.

Kas
===============================================================
Why not? Use only as directed

Joelsenior>>



I find it rude/disrespectful. I don't get all shrieky about it... I just couldn't ever be interested in a man that referred to women that way. But cheer up, from what I gather from your other posts, you would never consider dating me anyway, so it isn't much of a loss. :-D

Kas

2a. It separates the sluts from the nice chicks

Ya know women are just about as interested in sex as men are. But some men will take their time...as will some women...and other men and women will not take their time.....

so be true to yourself.....


db

PS and get some viagra....LOL

After 20 years in nerdville I can count on one hand the
number of acceptable chicks I have seen in IT

Oh that's right. I always forget how slim the pickings are from the other side.

6, in contractor heaven

I find it rude/disrespectful. I don't get all shrieky about it... I just couldn't ever be interested in a man that referred to women that way.

Do you prefer the term women or girs?

I meant women or girls.To me women sounds like they're older (30ies?), where girls sound younger (20ies). I do think that chicks is better than b*tches. I don't usually used either unless I am talking to a bunch of guys...even then it's usually "chicks".

I find it rude/disrespectful. I don't get all shrieky about it... I just couldn't ever be interested in a man that referred to women that way.

I usually will use the term "chick" at least once with any potential date, jsut to see her reaction and to weed out the ones who would be offended and <drama>emotionally devastated</drama> from hearing such an insensitvie term.

They will hear much worse hanging around me, so it's better to get that out of the way up front.

RJ

I bet Joelsenior doesn't call women "chicks" in front of his dates.

- KG
============================================================

You would win.
I am polite to a fault

Joelsenior

But cheer up, from what I gather from your other posts, you would never consider dating me anyway, so it isn't much of a loss. :-D

Kas
=======================================================


Why? I love Sweden.
Joelsenior

Ya know women are just about as interested in sex as men are
db ========================================================


I concur!
But only until they get married

Joelsenior

I do think that chicks is better than b*tches. I don't usually used either unless I am talking to a bunch of guys...even then it's usually "chicks".

SweetPeee ========================================================


I'm also partial to "broads"
Joelsenior

usually will use the term "chick" at least once with any potential date, jsut to see her reaction and to weed out the ones who would be offended and <drama>emotionally devastated</drama> from hearing such an insensitvie term.

They will hear much worse hanging around me, so it's better to get that out of the way up front.

RJ
================================================================


Ixnay on the secret info, dumbass

Joelsenior

Ixnay on the secret info, dumbass

I do that with girls I'm just potentially going to hang out with. I mean, who wants to party with someone who has nothing better to do than complain about the word "chick"?

Well, probably some other uptight stick in the muds, but not me.

6

Ixnay on the secret info, dumbass


It hasn't been a secret for 10 or more years, jackass. Of course I know you have been out of the game for a while.

eff off

RJ

You would win.
I am polite to a fault

Joelsenior

I believe that....personally I am not polite to a "fault". I let my hair down.

db

"""" Never Get Your Honey Where You Make Your Money """"


-- MrMax --

Now the term "Broads" is a demeaning word. It's never used in a
positive way.

"Chicks" on the otherhand is viewed by most men as a neutral term.

"Women" is too formal.
---------------------------------------------

To 6

I understand your fear. There are some sick bastards out there.

-- MrMax --

<<I find it rude/disrespectful. I don't get all shrieky about it... I just couldn't ever be interested in a man that referred to women that way.

Do you prefer the term women or girs? >>

Girs? LOL. Assuming you mean girls... either is fine. I don't know what it is about the word "chick" - it just bugs me.

<<I usually will use the term "chick" at least once with any potential date, jsut to see her reaction and to weed out the ones who would be offended and <drama>emotionally devastated</drama> from hearing such an insensitvie term.

They will hear much worse hanging around me, so it's better to get that out of the way up front.>>

But that's my point. You wouldn't see/hear any reaction from me. If you only did it once, I'd probably overlook it. Using it with any regularity would simply close the door on the option of dating you. But the door closes quietly within my brain - no slamming involved.

<<But cheer up, from what I gather from your other posts, you would never consider dating me anyway, so it isn't much of a loss. :-D

Kas
=======================================================


Why? I love Sweden.
Joelsenior>>


If you offered to take me to Sweden, I'd go. But I still don't think you'd want to date me. LOL

Incidentally, I'd never date a man who referred to women as "chicks". Your mileage may vary.

I refer to women as chicks, myself included.

Donna

Ya know women are just about as interested in sex as men are

In my case, I'd venture to say more so.

Donna

I refer to women as chicks, myself included.

Me too. Have done for years. Got chewed out for it by a humorless lesbian once, at which point I added the words "dame" and "skirt" to my vocabulary.

Twee

Me too. Have done for years. Got chewed out for it by a humorless lesbian once, at which point I added the words "dame" and "skirt" to my vocabulary.

I just don't get what's offensive about it.

Donna

<<I refer to women as chicks, myself included.

Donna >>

Okay. I probably won't date you either. :-D

Kas

<<I refer to women as chicks, myself included.

Donna >>

----------------------------

Okay. I probably won't date you either. :-D


I would. But I've seen her.

Twee

<<Me too. Have done for years. Got chewed out for it by a humorless lesbian once, at which point I added the words "dame" and "skirt" to my vocabulary.

I just don't get what's offensive about it.

Donna>>


1. I'm neither humorless nor lesbian.

2. Maybe it's a personal taste thing. Maybe it's a generational thing.

I didn't mean for it to become an issue on the board... I just mentioned it because sometimes people don't know what they are saying could be offensive. For those who don't agree or don't care, feel free to live your life. For those who care and didn't know... use the information however you want.

Again - I would never "chew someone out" for it. It is just something that I find in bad taste.

Kas

It hasn't been a secret for 10 or more years, jackass. Of course I know you have been out of the game for a while.

eff off

RJ
==============================================================

A while?
Not counting the ex, the last time I was dating
Reagan was President.

Joelsenior

I added the words "dame" and "skirt" to my vocabulary.

Twee
=======================================================

Good, maybe they'll make a comeback.

My son was asking me about college and partying and such.
I lied and said I studied all the time and didn't waste
time drinking and chasing skirts.

He didn't know what "chasing skirts" meant.

gsjs

I refer to women as chicks, myself included.

In reference to you, I think it's just "hotchick", one word.

6

I think it's just "hotchick", one word.

It took awhile, but I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that I'm attractive, so I will simply say "Thank you".

Donna

I didn't mean for it to become an issue on the board...

I didn't mean to point at you specifically, just my own feelings on the word. I agree with you, though, it can and is offensive to some.

Donna

Okay. I probably won't date you either. :-D</i<

There I go, excluding people again. :-)

Donna

It took awhile, but I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that I'm attractive, so I will simply say "Thank you".


Damnit! Who is the do-godding bastard that has ruined you for the rest of us?

Hotchicks that don't know they are hot are the best.


RJ

Hotchicks that don't know they are hot are the best.

Are attractive and hot the same thing?

Donna

Are attractive and hot the same thing?

Hot is a combination of attractiveness and sexiness*.

RJ


*sexiness = willingness to put out, or at least the willingness to make us think you will put out

Hotchicks that don't know they are hot are the best.


RJ

I like Jenny McCarthy...hot and can still act like a goof.Hot women/girls/chicks/skirts/ladies/wenches/sea hags/ that don't act like they're hot rock!

J.P.

Are attractive and hot the same thing?

Donna

To me, hot is on the surface...purely visual. Attractive is something on the surface and something a little deeper.

To me, hot is on the surface...purely visual. Attractive is something on the surface and something a little deeper.

To me, hot goes clear to the bone.

To me, hot is on the surface...purely visual. Attractive is something on the surface and something a little deeper.

To me, hot goes clear to the bone.

=============================================================

Have you ever been attracted to someone you've never seen?

To me, hot is on the surface...purely visual. Attractive is something on the surface and something a little deeper.

I'd like to believe I'm attractive then. The truth is I usually don't get much of a second look on sight, but as people, guys and gals, get to know me they tell me I'm attractive.

Donna

I'd like to believe I'm attractive then. The truth is I usually don't get much of a second look on sight, but as people, guys and gals, get to know me they tell me I'm attractive.


I gave your picture a second look before. You have a hot body.


RJ

I'd like to believe I'm attractive then. The truth is I usually don't get much of a second look on sight, but as people, guys and gals, get to know me they tell me I'm attractive.

Donna

Mercy Please! NJ is not that big of a state ;-)

J.P.

Only a total jackass would let a chick pay for a date.

But it wouldn't have been a date because she already said it's not a date. So I agree, if you two had gone out she should've expected to pay her own way.

Don't crap where you eat. It's bad for business.

My motto is "You don't get your meat where you make your bread"

Me too. Have done for years. Got chewed out for it by a humorless lesbian once, at which point I added the words "dame" and "skirt" to my vocabulary.


Don't forget broad and cookie.

Starr ;)
Uses them all regularly

It took awhile, but I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that I'm attractive, so I will simply say "Thank you".


Good girl. Attractive=so hot she can make straight women drool.

Starr ;)

You have a hot body.

You're not a boob man, huh?

Donna

Now that's going a bit too far. I'm cute and that tends to grow on people.

Donna

You're not a boob man, huh?

Nope. I like legs.

And what's between them.


RJ

Now that's going a bit too far. I'm cute and that tends to grow on people.



OK....DK Jr.

Starr....It's my party and I'll drool if I want to.

OK....DK Jr.

No, no, no...I am not that bad.

Donna

JoelS,

try accounting. or sales. hey try them both!
with a bit of luck you can have all the departments hating you in months.



jC










dont **it where you sleep

<<Me too. Have done for years. Got chewed out for it by a humorless lesbian once, at which point I added the words "dame" and "skirt" to my vocabulary.
I just don't get what's offensive about it.
Donna>>
I didn't mean for it to become an issue on the board... I just mentioned it because sometimes people don't know what they are saying could be offensive. For those who don't agree or don't care, feel free to live your life. For those who care and didn't know... use the information however you want.
Again - I would never "chew someone out" for it. It is just something that I find in bad taste.
Kas
a friend of mine laid into me for using 'Lady' because she associated it with a cab driver yelling "Hey Lady get outa da way!"

my boss told me to do something 'Right Now' so i said 'Yes Mam' (typical military?) and i was told "AND DONT CALL ME MAM"
i asked her the next day how she would prefer to be adresed and she replied "Mrs". (mam is short for Madame, the lady in charge of the house of ill repute. Mrs recognizes the woman as married (untouchable) and head of the household)

cultural? associations? i guess. you can always insult someone somehow.

jC

always formal to the cute ladies.
and no i dont know how to spell mam correctly

"DONT CALL ME MA'AM" i asked her the next day how she would prefer to be adresed and she replied "Mrs". (ma'am is short for Madame, the lady in charge of the house of ill repute. Mrs recognizes the woman as married (untouchable) and head of the household)

She's full of shyte. Ma'am, is short for Madame, yes; but Madame comes to us from the French where it is literally "my lady". Monsieur for the men, and Madame for the women; both words have the French prefix which in English means "my" ("mon" for a masculine noun and "ma" for a feminine noun); they're basically the same word, except for gender: "my sir" and "my lady". For the females, "dame" is mature, as opposed to mademoiselle, who is my jeune fille.

And yeah, there's also an American slang usage of madame as a lady running a bordello, a procuress. But that's not the main usage, or the mainstream usage, or even a common usage except in movies of the Old West.

Tell that cranky hag to stop to stop watching so many Westerns, and that she can find other reasons for being a prickly complaining beeyotch, without trying to pass her ignorant ass off as some kind of expert in etymology or philology.

Uh, actually, since she's your boss, maybe you better tell her something else.

Tell that cranky hag to stop to stop watching so many Westerns, and that she can find other reasons for being a prickly complaining beeyotch, without trying to pass her ignorant ass off as some kind of expert in etymology or philology.

Uh, actually, since she's your boss, maybe you better tell her something else.

oh i did. i said goodby when i quit,
jC