Message Font: Serif | Sans-Serif
 
UnThreaded | Threaded | Whole Thread (16) | Ignore Thread Prev Thread | Prev | Next | Next Thread
Author: alstroemeria Big gold star, 5000 posts Top Recommended Fools Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 5021  
Subject: Re: keeping the ex's name after divorce Date: 1/25/2013 8:43 AM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll . Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 1
I don't see it as an ethical issue whether a woman keeps her married name after divorce or reverts to her maiden name. Even if she does it out of spite.

I married young and didn't feel ready to give up that aspect of my identity, my name--it is how I thought of myself. Mrs <first-husband's-last-name> was his mother, not me! But I eventually started using ex's last name--without changing it anywhere legally--for medical/kids' school records as records were getting lost or confused, and I wasn't being properly recognized as my children's mother. This was back in the 70s/early 80s when a suburban, non-professional woman keeping her maiden name was an oddity.

The second time around, I might've changed my name what with 3 last names in the household, but second hubby's last name is very rare even in the Netherlands whence it came, hard to spell, hard to pronounce. My original last name seems less important as part of my identity, especially since my father died. But just yesterday, when we took a tour of the new local Boeing facotry under the auspices of a scientific organization of which my husband is a member...although he provided my real name, they used <myfirstname> <hubby's last name> on my badge. I didn't mind. My mother has always addressed mail to me using my husband's last name, which is more annoying.

I used my maiden name as my daughter's middle name and deeply regret it. She travels regularly to Muslim countries and it's a Jewish name. I've pleaded with her to change it, to no avail :-( She is certain nobody notices or cares. I am not so certain. A rose by any other name...
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll . Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post  
UnThreaded | Threaded | Whole Thread (16) | Ignore Thread Prev Thread | Prev | Next | Next Thread

Announcements

What was Your Dumbest Investment?
Share it with us -- and learn from others' stories of flubs.
When Life Gives You Lemons
We all have had hardships and made poor decisions. The important thing is how we respond and grow. Read the story of a Fool who started from nothing, and looks to gain everything.
Community Home
Speak Your Mind, Start Your Blog, Rate Your Stocks

Community Team Fools - who are those TMF's?
Contact Us
Contact Customer Service and other Fool departments here.
Work for Fools?
Winner of the Washingtonian great places to work, and "#1 Media Company to Work For" (BusinessInsider 2011)! Have access to all of TMF's online and email products for FREE, and be paid for your contributions to TMF! Click the link and start your Fool career.
Advertisement