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I think our IRA’s currently go to spouse

If they don't, it is likely the spouse had to sign away the right to be the primary beneficiary. This is also true with 401ks. In any event, it should be a great nudge to review all your beneficiaries.

it would be a big issue as we have a lot in 401K’s.

If this is the case, it's time to review your estate planning with a professional. Also, everything called a "trust" doesn't work the same way.
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