I think there's less of a problem between share of knowledge between wife/husband, and a greater issue with aging parents.In my case, a few years ago my mom wanted to tell me some of where things like her will are - but it was cryptic like - "I have a security box in this closet, the key is in this jewlery box" - but then there was something (maybe her actual will) that I was supposed to go on a scavanger hunt for. So I've explained A - she needs to write directions down B - she needs somekind of "incapacity" clause/set-up and include information for me like her bank accounts and how to pay condo fees, etc and C - if she does become incapacitate or dies, I need to know exactly how to get to things because I still have my own full-time job - I won't have all the time in the day to deal with her affairs.But unfortunately there's still been no true sharing.
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