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Author: cabinsmama Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 310986  
Subject: Re: Fresh start: help budget & life goals Date: 11/30/2011 7:02 PM
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I'm all for giving advice--I've handed out some today. And it is a gray area. I know I've handed out my share of bad advice, usually when I'm talking about things I know just a little bit about.

Off the top of my head, I'd say that advising someone to direct strong negative emotions towards themselves in specific ways is risky (and I'd consider that across the board, since not everyone lays it out that they are a person dealing with mental illness.)

And it's because you're right...that kind of repetitious self-talk is very powerful & effective. If it's not used right, it can go south pretty quick.

Advising someone to do something a reasonable person would consider dangerous if it went bad, IMO, is risky. Like advising someone to cut corners on a load-bearing wall vs. cutting corners on a bookshelf.

Now, calling someone on their bull, pointing out that they're being dishonest, or they're doing the same things that got them in trouble, or they're just wrong-headed, etc...that's pretty common around here, and it can be pretty effective. And it feels less risky to me.

I'm not sure if that answers your question, but that's all I've got right now.

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