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It is still unfeminine to lead without apology. It is still unfeminine to be a sexual aggressor...

Thought: you could replace "unfeminine" with "not heterosexually desirable" in Ms Owens copy and it still makes sense. The notion of feminity is bound up with notions of sexuality. You can't separate them without losing half of the masculine-feminine whole, ephemeral as that notion really is and indistinct those roles always are.

What I'm trying to say is, concepts of feminity and masculinity are as much about what each gender--and moreover, each person--perceives as attractive as they are about anything else.

Ascalon (yeah, yeah, not here, gone now)
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