Message Font: Serif | Sans-Serif
 
UnThreaded | Threaded | Whole Thread (40) | Ignore Thread Prev | Next
Author: SweetPeee Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 32852  
Subject: Re: I am so heartbroken Date: 11/21/2004 10:52 PM
Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Recommendations: 37
It was a plant, I reasoned, then I realized that it is the connection that I have with her is "dying".

I think you've built this up in your head into something it never was for her.

Then last week I finally had the courage to "casually" ask her to go to a movie with me. After some haggling, she finally agreed.But then she replied that another person (married) is interested in going.

If you had to "haggle" to get her to go out with you,it's not a good sign.If she invited a third person, it's the kiss of death.She didn't want to go out with you alone to begin with.If she did, she would have.

She was very surprised, said she treats me like a friend.

The kiss of death.Should have ended all romantic feelings for her or you could appear to be an obsessed psycho.

She agreed to think about it

Of course she'd tell you that. She didn't want to be rude and didn't like being put on the spot face to face.

This is a gal that I really like but I was afraid to approach her because we work together and I am afraid of messing up a great friendship.

I seem to do the same thing.I get interested and do nothing.Work relationships can be very difficult. As a rule I don't usually look there.

I don't regret it but I felt like a big loser.

And here you are writing about it.Go out as soon as possible and socialize! She's ONE woman of many...

I am still shocked that she didn't jump at the opportunity.

Jump at the opportunity? If this were the case, why are you sweating ONE woman?

I mean, I would rate myself an 85 out of 100. I am pretty smart, have a great job, no debt, house paid off, drive a mercedes, in other words, financially and emotionally stable. Why did she turn me down?

Maybe none of this is important to her.Maybe she sees herself the same way and doesn't think you have anything beyond what she already has.

I was so devastated at the time when my boss told I got a 3k bonus, I gave him a blank stare. Nothing seems to matter anymore. I went on a shopping spree with my closest friend but that didn't help much. He said it could be our age difference that she turned me down. She is 44 and I am 32. But age does not matter to me. She is smart, independent, has a great sense of humor, and cute. Now the more I think about it the sadder I become. Could this be the reason, or is the true reason that she really wants to have a work relationship and has no interest in me?

You seem to have all these material things, and call yourself "emotionally stable" yet you seem to be depressed about this.

News flash:You're NOT emotionally stable.

It was just a date,just a woman.It didn't work out...big deal.Move on! If you project your emotions the way you did in this post in real life, that would be a major red flag.

Finally...

She replied with a stern email that she simply wanted to maintain our work relationship. I was quite disappointed and surprised by the tone of her message. I have replied and even called her, but so far I have yet to hear back from her.

A stern email says "there's no way in hell I am interested" and even AFTER that, you replied to the email and called her?!?!?!??!?!? And you really expect to hear back from her? She's not interested...

J.P.

P.S. I am sure there is more to it than what you wrote here, but on paper it looks like you're in a pre-stalker phase.Let it go.


Post New | Post Reply | Reply Later | Create Poll Report this Post | Recommend it!
Print the post  
UnThreaded | Threaded | Whole Thread (40) | Ignore Thread Prev | Next

Announcements

Foolanthropy 2014!
By working with young, first-time moms, Nurse-Family Partnership is able to truly change lives – for generations to come.
When Life Gives You Lemons
We all have had hardships and made poor decisions. The important thing is how we respond and grow. Read the story of a Fool who started from nothing, and looks to gain everything.
Post of the Day:
Macro Economics

The Story Behind the Story
What was Your Dumbest Investment?
Share it with us -- and learn from others' stories of flubs.
Community Home
Speak Your Mind, Start Your Blog, Rate Your Stocks

Community Team Fools - who are those TMF's?
Contact Us
Contact Customer Service and other Fool departments here.
Work for Fools?
Winner of the Washingtonian great places to work, and "#1 Media Company to Work For" (BusinessInsider 2011)! Have access to all of TMF's online and email products for FREE, and be paid for your contributions to TMF! Click the link and start your Fool career.
Advertisement