No. of Recommendations: 0
...joining AARP would not represent to me a step in the direction that I would like to go in my life, in terms of retaining some youthful energy and mindset within the limitations that I have as an older person

You feel about AARP the way I feel about the "50+ lunches" at the senior centers in town. I prefer to hang around my "elderly peers" by volunteering and singing in a community choir.

Earble
"I'm getting old, but I'm not old yet." -- David Myles: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o2J9dOwHc8
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 3
I joined when I turned 50 and added my husband and can honestly say I never used any of the discounts. I did occasionally enjoy reading the magazine. They bombard you with junk mail. I finally stopped renewing but I still get at least 2 pieces of mail from them a month, despite asking them, in writing, to take us off their list. I take care of my mom's affairs and I thought she had to be a member to have the insurance. Once I learned she didn't, I cancelled it. Once you are in their system, apparently you are in forever. so, all 3 of us get tons of mail despite not wanting to be members any longer. I say, run away!
JK
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 5
I learned all I needed to know about AARP back in the early Obamacare days. Saw a video (it's probably still up on youtube) a young woman AARP rep gave a talk & slide show, a few of the oldsters asked some questions --- and she folded up the presentation and walked out. Evidently you were not allowed to ask questions.

I've heard AARP characterised as "an insurance company marketing arm posing as a retired people's special interest group." I just toss their mail in the trash unopened, like all the other junk mail. We *still* get weekly mailings from Omaha Steaks due to the one order we made 10 years ago. And from Dish Network that we dropped 6 years ago.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
Thank you both for the confirmation. If it were such a good thing word of mouth would keep them from having to bombard us with ads.

IP
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 11
Well, I'm going to offer a different view. AARP offers a huge amount of discounts for different areas, some more useful than others, and some not much different than what I can get from AAA. And yes, you do get a lot of email pushing the AARP Foundation, informing you of discounts, etc. I am pretty sure you can manage it online but I haven't bothered - it's just as easy to delete. And there's the occasional junk mail pushing an insurance product, but everyone does that.

There are two print publications I receive monthly, a newspaper style product and a magazine style product. I've actually enjoyed reading many of the articles in both. They also offer free resources for seniors, such as tax and elder care advice.

So overcommunative, yes, but in terms of discount value for the annual subscription rate, it's not a bad deal.

Fuskie
Who notes just 5 uses of the $3 discount on a small popcorn and coke at Regal theaters pays for the membership, and he can use that up just on the Disney movies he "researches" each year...

-----
Ticker Guide for The Walt Disney Company (DIS), Orbital ATK (OA), Global Payments (GPN), Time Warner (TWX)
Disclaimer: This post is non-professional and should not be construed as direct, individual or accurate advice
Disclosure: May own shares of some, many or all of the companies mentioned in this post (tinyurl.com/FuskieDisclosure)
Fool Code of Conduct: http://tinyurl.com/FoolCode
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
Well, I'm going to offer a different view.

Much appreciated.

Might be able to get the $15 back with discounts at Outbacks, but looking at this list there is probably not much we would take advantage of: https://www.aarp.org/benefits-discounts/

Pretty sure most of these offers are available to everyone.

IP
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
Has anybody used their car buying program?

Earble
Looking into a new car, wondering how useful this is...
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
Has anybody used their car buying program?

I suspect it's rather like Costco's where prices are pre-negotiated for you. Some people don't like to negotiate, but frankly I love it and am good at it, so I buy under my own canopy. If you hate negotiating, it could be a good deal. AARP is certainly cheaper than Costco, but I get my money's worth from Costco.

IP
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 4
It's basically a lobbying firm run for the benefit of its executives that makes a good portion of its income selling the AARP endorsement to insurance companies in co-branding deals.

intercst
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 3
It's basically a lobbying firm run for the benefit of its executives

That sounds like a pretty big bias. Care to offer some foundation for your claim?

Fuskie
Who knows that taking positions on political issues that represent the issues of seniors is part of what the organization does, but it's hardly the only organization that does so and that does not mean it is not offering a valuable suite of benefits to members...

-----
Ticker Guide for The Walt Disney Company (DIS), Orbital ATK (OA), Global Payments (GPN), Time Warner (TWX)
Disclaimer: This post is non-professional and should not be construed as direct, individual or accurate advice
Disclosure: May own shares of some, many or all of the companies mentioned in this post (tinyurl.com/FuskieDisclosure)
Fool Code of Conduct: http://tinyurl.com/FoolCode
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
Has anybody used their car buying program?

Sam's Club
Costco
Truecar/dot/com
etc.

All have essentially the same car buying program.

We bought a Honda CRV last year using one of these (I forget which one.) After putting in my info on the model I wanted, I got 3 emails from 3 dealers. One said "I can give you the car you want for $1100 less than the {buyer service} quote." That's where we bought it from, and yes, it was $1100 less.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
Pretty sure most of these offers are available to everyone.

IP


I'm not so sure.

Try it and find out.

Karen
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 18
At one time, I think AARP was an advocacy group for those over 50. If that were ever true, it is not any longer. But I am a member. Every year I consider whether I am getting my money's worth or not. So far, I do, and it's really not even a close call.

How do I get my money's worth?

1- hotel/motel discounts - SGSpouse and I do a lot of road trips to many fairly remote areas. Our hobby is archaeology and we volunteer for a lot of field work run by government agencies. We also travel to visit sites we've heard about and want to see. On these trips, we camp or stay in local motels/hotels. When we were younger we camped if possible and never spent money on motels. Now, we prefer motels if they are within driving distance of things we want to visit. We seldom find a place that does not offer an AARP discount. It doesn't take too many discount nights to pay for the membership. Now, whenever I tell people this, they often respond that they have AAA or some other membership that gets them discounts. Or they say they think everyone gets the discount if they ask. AAA has similar hotel discounts negotiated, but in many of the remote places we've traveled, AAA discounts are not provided. And I never make a hotel reservation without negotiating on price. I realize this situation may not exist for everyone, but in our case, we have always saved enough on AARP hotel discounts to justify membership.

2- free movies - I'm not sure why, but here in Phoenix, AARP offers free Movies for Grownups about once per month. They negotiate some kind of deal with local theaters and allow you to sign up to attend a showing for free. The last one we attended was Black Panther. We attend 5 or 6 of these each year.

3- AARP publications - Their magazine really is pretty good - not as good as Sierra Club magazine, for example - but worth reading some of the articles. The tabloid style publication is not as readable, but also has descent information in it sometimes. I don't read every article in either one, but I usually find one or two per month that interest me and occasionally I find many.

Whether someone else will get their money's worth depends mostly on their own lifestyle and what other discounts they might have access to. You do have to find ways to avoid their junk mail onslaught and don't count on them to lobby effectively for preservation of SS and Medicare, but if your lifestyle allows you take advantage of some of their benefits and discounts, the membership can pay for itself. And when it doesn't anymore, I'll drop them like a hot potato.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 2
The AARP is a lobbying organization - just like the NRA, Peanut Butter Association and Patriots for Good Government. They want numbers of members.

You can stop the advertising if you want by calling them on the phone as saying either stop the unsolicited stuff, or cancel my membership. They understand that choice -- been there done that.

I keep my membership only because we have medigap insurance with the AARP name through United Healthcare. You cannot buy that without a membership - not sure about keeping the insurance and have not cared to look.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 6
Lobbying, or advocacy, is only part of what they do.

Fuskie
Who thinks clearly if you disagree with what they advocate, i.e. looking out for the best interests of adults over 50, then he would agree the organization may not be worth the discounts and incentives they offer, but to imply they are only a lobbying organization is looking at with too narrow a focus...

-----
Ticker Guide for The Walt Disney Company (DIS), Orbital ATK (OA), Global Payments (GPN), Time Warner (TWX)
Disclaimer: This post is non-professional and should not be construed as direct, individual or accurate advice
Disclosure: May own shares of some, many or all of the companies mentioned in this post (tinyurl.com/FuskieDisclosure)
Fool Code of Conduct: http://tinyurl.com/FoolCode
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 3
Was a member years ago but stopped when I realized I didn't care for their politics.

We switched to AMAC and are quite happy with them. Like AARP, lots of marketing, but also some good articles in their monthly magazine.

BruceM
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 4
1- hotel/motel discounts - SGSpouse and I do a lot of road trips to many fairly remote areas. Our hobby is archaeology and we volunteer for a lot of field work run by government agencies. We also travel to visit sites we've heard about and want to see. On these trips, we camp or stay in local motels/hotels. When we were younger we camped if possible and never spent money on motels. Now, we prefer motels if they are within driving distance of things we want to visit. We seldom find a place that does not offer an AARP discount. It doesn't take too many discount nights to pay for the membership.


I always ask for the AARP discount even though I don't belong to AARP (anymore). I usually get it. It is quite obvious that we are old enough to belong. Only a couple of times have we been asked for proof, and I just say, "We are travelling and I don't carry that paperwork with me."

The counter clerks don't really care, they just click the check-box for the affinity rate and read off the room rate.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 5
what they advocate, i.e. looking out for the best interests of adults over 50

Assumes facts not in evidence.


but to imply they are only a lobbying organization is looking at with too narrow a focus..

Alas, it is a well-observed fact that many if not most long-standing such organizations are run for the benefit of the people running the show--the CEO's, etc. and the benefits delivered to the purported beneficiaries are a side show.

Just because they _claim_ to be "looking out for the best interests of adults over 50" doesn't mean it is true.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 4
I always ask for the AARP discount even though I don't belong to AARP (anymore). I usually get it. It is quite obvious that we are old enough to belong. Only a couple of times have we been asked for proof, and I just say, "We are travelling and I don't carry that paperwork with me."

Some ask for it. Some don't. Some will not provide the discount unless you show the card - same for AAA. Some will give you discounts even if you admit you are not a member. (I've seen it happen with people in front of me in line).

Typically I don't bring up either AAA or AARP or any hotel points card when I first ask the rate for a room. My next question is, "Do you have any cheaper rooms or better rates available?". Many times I get a significant discount just for asking that question. Sometimes the answer is that they have a AAA rate or AARP rate. And sometimes they offer one of those rates without even asking to see a card. But often they mention the rate if you can show a card.

I should mention that in addition to the motel camping in no-name motels in remote areas, I also travel all over the world as a volunteer for an international engineering professional organization. While much of that travel is reimbursed (ie. costs me nothing) I tend to stay for a week or two beyond the meetings in large 4-star hotels on those trips. They too often offer AARP or AAA discounts. But they also tend to require you show them a membership card to get it.

The counter clerks don't really care, they just click the check-box for the affinity rate and read off the room rate.

Yeah . . . Sometimes the hotel clerk is a member of the family that lives in and runs the hotel. They tend to be the pickiest. Also, sometimes hotel clerks do care. Some larger, upscale hotels have pretty specific rigid policies that they expect clerks to follow, and if you happen to be checking in when there are multiple clerks behind the desk, you might get a different experience than you get when there is only one part-time worker who is up all night making money to pay for classes.

AAA and AARP do conduct audits on hotels apparently. I have been to hotels that got caught and are currently required to provide membership numbers off of the cards to get the discount. But sure . . . you can definitely con your way into a discount sometimes.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 16
Just because they _claim_ to be "looking out for the best interests of adults over 50" doesn't mean it is true.

“People over 50” is a very large group, often with disparate interests.

AARP is one of the most effective lobbying groups for preservation of Social Security and Medicare, contrary to what some have posted upthread.

AARP , the powerful lobby for older Americans that has been seen as one of the leading opponents of Social Security benefit cuts, said on Friday that it was open to modest reductions ...

I don’t agree with everything the ACLU does or says either, but I support them because in the broad overview they mostly get it right. Same, I believe, with AARP.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
I think AARP realizes that both SS and Medicare are in trouble and will consider solutions to keep them funded at high levels.

That might mean not giving Bill Gates and similar folks with 8 digit portfolios SS payout..

It's really just a matter of time until SS is means tested.....it can't go on with only 2 people working to support one retiree...which is where we are headed now.....

t.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
When I received their stuff to join in the mail, I started trying to weigh out whether the cost to join would be worth it in discounts, and after a minute or two of doing that, I realized that to me, joining would feel too much like declaring myself to be an old person. I wasn't ready to do that, and hopefully never will be. I immediately tossed the stuff in the trash, and have never regretted that decision for an instant.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 14
I realized that to me, joining would feel too much like declaring myself to be an old person. I wasn't ready to do that, and hopefully never will be.

I find this to be a very strange statement.

I've heard of people who don't like to admit how old they are. Can you explain how that works? Do you deny your age to everyone? What about yourself . . . do you wake up in the morning and say to yourself, "I think I'll pretend to be only 30 today"? And I'm curious how denying your age actually helps. What does denial provide you that honesty about your age does not?
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 4
"I realized that to me, joining would feel too much like declaring myself to be an old person. I wasn't ready to do that, and hopefully never will be."

I find this to be a very strange statement.

I've heard of people who don't like to admit how old they are. Can you explain how that works? Do you deny your age to everyone?



Heh. Try living or even just driving through the South. When we first moved down here from Chicago, I walked into an Arby's and the clerk said "Can I take your order, Sir". I looked around to see who he was talking to----and realized that he was addressing me! After I sat down at a table, I glanced at the receipt and noticed a line item: 10% Senior Discount. Which I never even asked for.


If you really want to "not declare yourself to be an old person", go on a cruise of 20 days or longer. Even if you are 75 you'll be in the younger crowd. ;-)
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 3
Heh. Try living or even just driving through the South. When we first moved down here from Chicago, I walked into an Arby's and the clerk said "Can I take your order, Sir". I looked around to see who he was talking to----and realized that he was addressing me! After I sat down at a table, I glanced at the receipt and noticed a line item: 10% Senior Discount. Which I never even asked for.

I got my first unsolicited senior discount when I was 52. I guess I looked ancient to the sweet young thing behind the counter; she sure looked awfully young to me.

Then I became a runner at age 55. At age 59, I found that runners don't get older; we "age up" into a different age group, and my team wanted me to age up to 60 sooner than my real birthday. Now I'm 62, and my role models are the 70+ year old guys on our team who are all slower than me, but crushing their competition from other teams.

As far as AARP - every time I looked at what they offered, it didn't look worth the membership fee to me. YMMV.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 6
I've heard of people who don't like to admit how old they are. Can you explain how that works? Do you deny your age to everyone? What about yourself . . . do you wake up in the morning and say to yourself, "I think I'll pretend to be only 30 today"? And I'm curious how denying your age actually helps. What does denial provide you that honesty about your age does not?

Thanks for the opportunity to clarify. I was not meaning to refer to the age number at all. I'm recovering from ankle fusion surgery from old injuries, and if I ever need a reminder of my age, I get it literally at every step.

What I was intending to refer to was a state of mind that AARP represents to me, which is kind of a stodgy one that I don't want to participate in. Maybe it's partly their ties to the insurance industry and political activity, and/or maybe they need to change up their marketing, but joining AARP would not represent to me a step in the direction that I would like to go in my life, in terms of retaining some youthful energy and mindset within the limitations that I have as an older person. I may be the only person in the world who feels this way about it, but nevertheless that is how I feel, and I have acted accordingly.

I realize there are many AARP members on this board who would take issue with that characterization, so I probably need to duck and run (slowly) for cover at this point, but I am certainly not making a blanket criticism of all AARP members here, and know there are many who would not fit my idea. My own mother was the gold standard of retaining the adaptable, engaged outlook on the world that I am shooting for until the day she died at 91, and she was a member.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
...joining AARP would not represent to me a step in the direction that I would like to go in my life, in terms of retaining some youthful energy and mindset within the limitations that I have as an older person

You feel about AARP the way I feel about the "50+ lunches" at the senior centers in town. I prefer to hang around my "elderly peers" by volunteering and singing in a community choir.

Earble
"I'm getting old, but I'm not old yet." -- David Myles: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o2J9dOwHc8
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 2
" ...joining AARP would not represent to me a step in the direction that I would like to go in my life, in terms of retaining some youthful energy and mindset within the limitations that I have as an older person

You feel about AARP the way I feel about the "50+ lunches" at the senior centers in town. I prefer to hang around my "elderly peers" by volunteering and singing in a community choir.

Earble
"I'm getting old, but I'm not old yet." -- David Myles: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o2J9dOwHc8 "

*******************************************************************

you're in luck.
AARP has an insurance product for that very thing.

Howie52
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 4
What does denial provide you that honesty about your age does not?

Mental health. ;-)

--Peter <== whose own mother stuck an AARP application inside my 50th birthday card. :)
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
I've only received two warnings (for speeding) in my life and both have occurred now that I'm in my 50s so I supposed aging helps with that :)

Also I was sitting on a subway seat somewhere in Europe and saw people getting on board and was going to get up when I realized, "hey I'm not 20/30s anymore and these people are younger than me" so I sat back down. Obviously if they were older and/or had mobility issues I would have given up my seat but it is weird to realize you are older.


Rich
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 5
Also I was sitting on a subway seat somewhere in Europe and saw people getting on board and was going to get up when I realized, "hey I'm not 20/30s anymore and these people are younger than me" so I sat back down. Obviously if they were older and/or had mobility issues I would have given up my seat but it is weird to realize you are older.

Being a middle aged woman who has earned every gray hair she has and refuses to hide them, I am constantly getting offers to help me with this or that. My philosophy is that when you start accepting that help you start needing that help, since your body gets used to not doing hard things regularly.

And I have to admit I've never been the shrinking violet who batts her eyelashes to get a man to do something for her. I find it highly insulting that there is incredulity that I can split wood, hang drywall, lift something heavy or even cut the grass and do investing simply because I am a female. It's definitely gotten worse since the gray came and I moved to the south. Don't even get me started on being called Ma'am. Trying to be culturally sensitive and realize it's pre-programmed but this Yankee can't shake the feeling it's similar to being called Grandma.

IP,
tending to prefer the satisfaction that comes from accomplishing a hard task
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
I find it highly insulting that there is incredulity that I can split wood, hang drywall, lift something heavy or even cut the grass and do investing simply because I am a female.

Mom? Is that you??
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
"Don't even get me started on being called Ma'am. Trying to be culturally sensitive and realize it's pre-programmed but this Yankee can't shake the feeling it's similar to being called Grandma.

IP,
tending to prefer the satisfaction that comes from accomplishing a hard task "

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I am noticing that I am starting to call ladies "Hon" or "Dear" - which may be the
result of being brought up in the Baltimore area - where everyone is a "hon".
But holding doors for ladies is traditional and even if the lady is a bruiser she
still deserves the holding of the door.

Howie52
The question you run into is how far a person is from the door before you no longer
feel obligated to hold the door. Generally, the older appearing ladies do get a
longer approach factor.

There is a science to many things.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 4
But holding doors for ladies is traditional and even if the lady is a bruiser she
still deserves the holding of the door.


Well that's just common courtesy, and something I do for whoever is behind me no matter their gender or age.

IP
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
"Well that's just common courtesy, and something I do for whoever is behind me no matter their gender or age.

IP "

*****************************************

Well, I wouldn't say that in all cases.
People who know me well have been known to barricade the door
closed if they see me coming along soon enough.

Howie52
But I tend to be too fast for'em
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
Also I was sitting on a subway seat somewhere in Europe and saw people getting on board and was going to get up when I realized, "hey I'm not 20/30s anymore and these people are younger than me" so I sat back down. Obviously if they were older and/or had mobility issues I would have given up my seat but it is weird to realize you are older.

Really weird: There are signs all over the T in Boston asking people to yield seats to older or disabled individuals. The Friday before Patriots' Day 2017, I was riding the T from the airport, and 3 different people who all looked older and more frail than I felt offered me their seats. I told them, "Maybe I'll need that seat on Tuesday." Yes, it was visually obvious that I am a marathon runner; and nobody in the Boston area is oblivious to the date of that particular marathon.

I was gratified to learn that looking old and wearing a Boston Celebration jacket was indeed good for a seat on the T the next Tuesday. I needed it then.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 2
"Don't even get me started on being called Ma'am. Trying to be culturally sensitive and realize it's pre-programmed but this Yankee can't shake the feeling it's similar to being called Grandma.

IP

==========================
I didn't think it's a Southern thing - it's really the polite thing, which is why you hear it less often these days. In no case does it mean you're old.

And in England, it's how you address the Queen, after greeting her initially as Your Majesty. Remember that, and it probably sounds better.

Bill
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
I love being called “Ma’am.”. It shows respect. What would you prefer?
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
IP: And I have to admit I've never been the shrinking violet who batts her eyelashes to get a man to do something for her. I find it highly insulting that there is incredulity that I can split wood, hang drywall, lift something heavy or even cut the grass and do investing simply because I am a female. It's definitely gotten worse since the gray came and I moved to the south. Don't even get me started on being called Ma'am. Trying to be culturally sensitive and realize it's pre-programmed but this Yankee can't shake the feeling it's similar to being called Grandma.

I still call women "ma'am" and men "sir" I don't like it when some kid at the dentist's office calls me by my first name.

CNC
... Old Texan
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
I love being called “Ma’am.”. It shows respect. What would you prefer?

My name. It recognizes me as a person, an individual. IMO Ma'am has little to do with respect and most to do with genericification. It's a knee jerk adherence to what you were told to do as a kid rather than a conscious form of respect.

IP
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
I don't like it when some kid at the dentist's office calls me by my first name.

We always had our kids use Mrs Smith or Miss Sue if that was preferred, rather than the generic Ma'am. Showed respect and individuality. We actually asked how people would prefer to be addressed, always deferring to Mrs or Mr if not given any guidance, though the guidance usually came after the first time someone was addressed formally.

IP
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 3
Oh.
Well, cashiers, waiters, etc don’t know my name.
And for contractors, receptionists, etc, “Yes Ma’am” is a lot quicker and sounds more natural than “Yes Mrs Multi-syllabic Last Name um how do you pronounce that?”

Still, either is better than using my first name. First-name usage by people with whom I don’t have a personal relationship is cheeky, overly familiar, intrusive, etc. I understand this is regional, and in California (more casual) and the Midwest (friendlier) no disrespect is intended, but it still sounds disrespectful to me.

YG
old fogey, but not an AARP member
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
Well, cashiers, waiters, etc don’t know my name.
And for contractors, receptionists, etc, “Yes Ma’am” is a lot quicker and sounds more natural than “Yes Mrs Multi-syllabic Last Name um how do you pronounce that?”


Sure, they know nothing about me so don't use any term. It's OK to be anonymous sometimes. Was a bank teller during college and it was a major PITA to use the customer's name, but it was a policy we were graded on by "shoppers" who posed as customers and rated your service. Was nothing less natural. But don't mistake this term of childhood for something that denotes respect. It's something that was drilled into people as a kid and now gets spit out without thinking. Respect is given with intent, not a mechanical action or phrase.

It's been a pet peeve of mine for decades.

IP
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
" What would you prefer? "

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I respond positively to, "You great big hunk-o burnin love."
But the laughter that generally follows kind of grates.

Howie52
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 9
But don't mistake this term of childhood for something that denotes respect. It's something that was drilled into people as a kid and now gets spit out without thinking. Respect is given with intent, not a mechanical action or phrase.
--------------------------------------------------
Not really. Things like "please" and "thank you" are usually said without a whole lot of thought about it also. But it's still the polite - respectful - thing to say. And when I was a kid, yes, I was taught that, but I don't think it took a whole lot of drilling to get it right.

In the military, female officers are called "Ma'am" just like male officers are called "sir."
And there, also, there is no implication that the person so addressed is old. It's just the thing to do.

Bill
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
Wradical "Not really. Things like "please" and "thank you" are usually said without a whole lot of thought about it also. But it's still the polite - respectful - thing to say. And when I was a kid, yes, I was taught that, but I don't think it took a whole lot of drilling to get it right.

. . .

And there, also, there is no implication that the person so addressed is old. It's just the thing to do."


I agree with the first part, and disagree with your last statement. Men were always "sir" regardless of age or marital status, but Miss instead of Ma'am was, at one time, a perfectly polite alternative for a young, single woman.

Regards, JAFO
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 2
"Ma'am" just like male officers are called "sir."


It's an honorific -- that's all.

It's not a put down or statement about age. Got it pretty well set in me as a yute in a very traditional Norman Rockwell sort of upbringing and then it wasfirmly engrained in 8+ years active duty.

Outside a military setting IMHO it's a polite deferrance to others. It says something about willingness to put aside self and acknowledge the other's worth. Same as stepping ahead and reaching to hold a door open -- regardless of gender.

Of course, as an old white hat enlisted if anyone calls me sir I growl "I'm no sir, I work for a living." But with an implied wink. ;)

Finally, being an old NCO let me offer up this in the spirit of Sgt Hulka to those who take umbrage at being addressed as sir or ma'am...

"Lighten up Francis."
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
"I love being called “Ma’am.”. It shows respect. What would you prefer?

My name. It recognizes me as a person, an individual. IMO Ma'am has little to do with respect and most to do with genericification. It's a knee jerk adherence to what you were told to do as a kid rather than a conscious form of respect.

IP "

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

The preferred term of Jerry Lewis was "Hey! Lady!" - ay least in his films.
Culture and tastes change - and ladies might find themselves called all
sorts of names or terms much less benign than Ma'am.

In these sorts of situations, the old chestnut "Just don't call me late for dinner."
comes to mind.

Howie52
Who is not offended if a lady tells me she doesn't like to called "ma'am" or
anything else.
Now should the lady call the cops, I might get a tad worried.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoYsfbq3vMc
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
Was a member years ago but stopped when I realized I didn't care for their politics.
...

BruceM


Ditto.

CNC
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
CountNoCount writes,

Was a member years ago but stopped when I realized I didn't care for their politics.
...

BruceM

Ditto.

CNC


</snip>


In which direction do you perceive AARP to bend?

intercst
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
In which direction do you perceive AARP to bend?

intercst


Too right and too pro gun lobby for my taste.

CNC
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
In which direction do you perceive AARP to bend?

I perceived them as right wing . . . until this past election and now they're squealing. Maybe they've learned a lesson, but who knows?

I'm with CNC and BruceM, but I never joined.

Chili
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 2

In which direction do you perceive AARP to bend?


Conquest's 2nd law of Politics:
Any organization not explicitly right-wing sooner or later becomes left-wing.

O’Sullivan’s First Law:
Any institution that is not explicitly right wing will become left wing over time.


Confirmed to me when I saw the video of the AARP presenter who was making an Obamacare presentation abruptly fold up the materials and leave when the oldsters in the audience started asking pointed questions.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 4
I perceived them as right wing . . . until this past election and now they're squealing.

Well, they are not right wing.

But..... "Association of Retired People". They should be completely non-political.


But it's all moot anyway. In reality, AARP is just the marketing arm for an insurance company.
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 7
In which direction do you perceive AARP to bend?

Thanks for the responses. As I suspected, liberals see the AARP as too right wing -- conservatives see it as a commie organization.

I stand my original analysis that their function is to enrich AARP executives.

intercst
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 0
Not really. Things like "please" and "thank you" are usually said without a whole lot of thought about it also. But it's still the polite - respectful - thing to say. And when I was a kid, yes, I was taught that, but I don't think it took a whole lot of drilling to get it right.

In the military, female officers are called "Ma'am" just like male officers are called "sir."
And there, also, there is no implication that the person so addressed is old. It's just the thing to do.
<\i>

Years ago when I was probably in my late 20s or maybe early 30s and most of the people I was working with were in a similar age range we had a young guy working in the office (maybe a high school work study type) and he came from a police/military family and called everyone "sir" and "ma'am" and it drove the young ladies crazy. They were like, hey I'm no old enough to be called "ma'am".

Sometimes you just can't win.

Rich
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 8
I perceived them as right wing . . . until this past election and now they're squealing. Maybe they've learned a lesson, but who knows?
I'm with CNC and BruceM, but I never joined.


I’m trying to figure out where you got that idea.

Since 2007, AARP board members have given almost exclusively to Democrats, with more than 97 percent of donations going to Democrat candidates and left-leaning causes,
http://netrightdaily.com/2012/06/is-aarp-left-wing/

AARP Faces Competition From Conservative-Leaning Groups
https://www.wsj.com/articles/aarp-faces-competition-from-con...

AARP media bias rating is Center.
https://www.allsides.com/news-source/aarp-0
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
I’m trying to figure out where you got that idea.

Probably the very same impulse I'm still too subject to in my life: assuming.

Pete
Print the post Back To Top
No. of Recommendations: 1
" I perceived them as right wing . . . until this past election and now they're squealing. Maybe they've learned a lesson, but who knows?
I'm with CNC and BruceM, but I never joined.

I’m trying to figure out where you got that idea.

Since 2007, AARP board members have given almost exclusively to Democrats, with more than 97 percent of donations going to Democrat candidates and left-leaning causes,
http://netrightdaily.com/2012/06/is-aarp-left-wing/

AARP Faces Competition From Conservative-Leaning Groups
https://www.wsj.com/articles/aarp-faces-competition-from-con......

AARP media bias rating is Center.
https://www.allsides.com/news-source/aarp-0"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

A history professor once lectured to a class I took back in the 1970s
that the Soviet Union was a conservative government and that the Red
Chinese were at the center of political thought.

Howie52
Political perspectives are much like the position of electrons.

On occasion you may wave at them and know if they are positive or negative,
but you may never find an actual point anywhere in particular.
Print the post Back To Top
Advertisement