The man I met in church emailed me after he got back to Texas and asked me to go to church and eat chicken with him for lunch. I was ecstatic!He took me by to see his house, a tidy little bungalow in one of Austin's more eclectic chic areas and we shared the hymnal and Bible again. At lunch in a park, I invited him for shrimp night at Quality Seafood and told him this time I'd pay. At first he said yes and then he told me he had to be honest with me.He had met recently a woman on Craig's List with whom he was newly developing a relationship and she didn't want him to have any other women in his life. He was sure she would say no when he asked her (ASKED her!) about it and no was what she said.I emailed him back and said I felt sorry for him because there was so much jealousy and possessiveness so early in the game and I felt sorry for him because she precluded being friends with me. (Notice the quick switch in terms here.)I felt good doing this. I felt great doing this. I had heard of men who believed that men and women couldn't be friends but at this point I had never met one. My DH and I were happily married for 19 years and until his death maintained our respective male and female friends.So isn't that a dream shatterer?lovelyrics
I think you have to follow your feelings. If it felt great, then it was the right thing to do. He sounds pretty wimpy if he has to ask new girl for permission to see a friend. Geez, control your own life, dude!Good luck to you and be your smart, fun self in front of him at church so he wonders what he is missed out on.
Well, I ran into my church friend at church and he sat with me, showed me pictures of his girlfriend on his cell phone, shared the hymnal, etc. and invited me out for chicken again to celebrate my joining the church that Sunday. We went to his house to eat the chicken, which was Mexican chicken roasted at a local taqueria, and drank Prickly Pear soda from Central Market/Whole Foods (I forget which). His wife had died several months (I don't know exactly how many) but she wore my size and he gave me several articles of clothing that had been hers. He said he would see me at church next Sunday.I had someone to talk about as well, this guy from a nearby town whose sister I met on Craig's List when I was looking for an office chair. She wants me to move there to be closer to her brother (get this: he doesn't drive any more and he's only 52--for no apparent reason. He sent me a picture and he is bald as a cue ball! I'm just not entertained by it; I prefer men with lots of hair on their heads, so we have a difference. He prefers women who are not very much overweight and I need to lose 80 lbs. easy. We still talk on the phone so at least it's another guy in my life I can talk about instead of being lonely. . .if that makes any sense. . .believe me, I'm going REALLY SLOW. . .So it looks like we are going to be friends anyway. He went to his girlfriend's church two weeks ago and it was very different from our church so who knows what will happen?Maybe men and women can be friends after all. And he's only been going with her a couple of weeks. . .lovelyrics
just wondrng if you would get this response if I sent it to author (note to rest: I know a lot more about this, person knows me in real life and I don't think she looks at TMF, doesn't kno password, etc).joycets
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