Mamma, your post obviously hit a nerve. (Actually, since my son turned about 13 I feel like I am in fact one giant nerve, quivering and twitching 24-7.) It's rough. Academic problems, check. Dope smoking incidents, check. Surly and angry, check. Love him with every fiber of my being, check. I had a moment last night a little similar to the one you described. Was laying down the law yet again, same old, same old. I just stopped and started really listening to him. Not talking and then waiting so I could talk again, but really listening with no agenda of my own. It ain't a cure-all, but I'm starting to get hold of something here. They are real people. Like us. The dinner was a very smart thing to do and most definitely worth it to both of you. Good luck with it.
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