I hope y'all don't mind, but this message was first posted to another board, but I've decided to share it here, also.


My shining boy, my first born son,
So fair and fine and fresh.
In utero I felt him flourish
From seed to fertile flesh.

My ego swelled with pregnant hopes
Of filial perfection.
Unaware that the wayward fates
Would change my life's direction.

At six months old, an ill-wind blew
That shattered lofty dreams.
The arrogance of normalcy
Smashed to smithereens.

Angel faced and full of Grace,
With dark-lashed eyes unflawed.
A kiss from Cupid's bow has forged
Sweet lips that lovers laud.

But beauty doesn't tell the tale
That explains my babe's existence.
To understand his life plan,
One must possess omniscience.

What would've been, or could've been,
Are questions rendered moot.
The answers cause the grief and pain
That time cannot dilute.



That Was Then, This Is Now.......ten years later

Okay, so I was wrong about time and diluted pain.
Those who came before, know more.
But acceptance and wisdom are a slow fit, met with much
resistance, like a pair of too-tight jeans.
Gotta ease into them...work em up slowly.
Tugging, fighting, almost giving up; trying a new tactic.
Stretching, forcing....at odds. Eventually things loosen up.
A little confining, but getting more comfortable with time.
It's okay, I accept it, I understand....it fits.


Patti