Starting today, television stations and networks have to monitor the volume of commercials so they don't blare more loudly than the accompanying programming.

The CALM (Commercial Advertisement Loudness Mitigation) standard, written over a year ago at the FCC, goes into effect now, and individuals can report violations on the FCC website. Industry captains said it's not necessary, because no network want to play commercials so loud that people reach for the remote control, where there is a channel change button as well as a volume control.

Which, of course, is why you have never been bothered by blaring commercials on any channel, anywhere, ever.