Murphy's Laws of Photography- You are not Ansel Adams- Neither are you Edward J. Steichen, Margaret Bourke White or Edward Weston- Automatic Cameras aren't always- Autofocus won't always- If you can't remember, you left the memory card at home- No photo assignment remains unchanged after the first day of shooting- If a photo shoot goes to smoothly, then your computers hard drive is likely about to crash- If it is stupid but it works, it isn't so stupid- Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the Client is watching- The most critical memory card is the one most likely to fail or get lost- Photo assistents are essential, they give the photographer someone to yell at- The one item (batteries, memory cards, etc.) you need is always in short supply at the store you are at.- Interchangeable parts rarely are- Long life batteries never live quite long enough- Weather never cooperates- Everything always works perfectly in your home or prior to a shoot, everything always fails on location or in the middl of a shoot- For every action, there is an equal and opposite critisism- The newest and least experienced photographer will usually win any photo competition- Every instruction given to a photo lab, which can be misunderstood, will be- Never tell a photo editor you have nothing to do- Anything which must be shipped together as a set, won't be- No photojournalist is well dressed- No well dressed photographer is a photojournalist- Professional photographers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs- Nature shots invariably happen on two occasions.. When the animals are ready and when your are not- Same rule as above, but substitute children- There is no such thing as a perfect shoot- The important things are always simple- The simple things always end up being hard- Flashes will fail as soon as you need them- A clean and dry camera is a magnet for dust, mud and moisture- Photographic experience is something you never get until just after you need it- The lens that fails most is always the most expensive- When you drop a lens cap, the inside part will always land face down in the mud- Bugs will always want to land on the mirror during a lens swap- Your batteries will always go dead during a long exposure with the shutter open- When you shoot the night away and never have to stop, you probably forgot toput in a memory card- Lenses are always attracted back to their source - Hard rocks and sand- The greater a photographer's excitement over a shot, the more likely they are to accidentally delete the file.- The success of an shoot is inversely proportional to the product of its importance and the number of people watching- Strobes only explode when lots of people are watching and they are within close proximity of a model- Strobes work best when there is nobody else to see them - auth unknown...
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