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Author: averagjoe Big funky green star, 20000 posts Top Favorite Fools Top Recommended Fools Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 167491  
Subject: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 10:52 AM
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While the inventions of Edison, Marconi and the Wright brothers may have been of some general benefit to mankind, my wife claims that her invention will have a far greater impact on the quality of life for women around the world.

http://slapstick.homestead.com/files/914c.jpg
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Author: TycoonGamer Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38879 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 11:03 AM
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Now we have an excuse for not lifting the lid in the first place.

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Author: JamesBrown Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38883 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 12:56 PM
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So your wife wants you to urinate with the seat down? Good grief, they complain enough about missing the bowl as it is, now the target has been reduced by half.

Will someone please help me understand the problem here? Whenever I'm about to sit down on a toilet, I take a quick glance. It takes about a half a second. Sometimes I can even feel for the position of the seat with the backs of my knees as I'm making my approach. If I'm not certain, I soak up a whopping half-second out of my busy schedule and make a quick visual. No problem.

Women, on the other hand, apparently have this need to remove the required clothing and flump down on the seat without being bothered to take a quick glance, maybe without even checking to see if they are in the bathroom.. And my wife accuses me of not paying attention to what's going on around me. Maybe, but I can assure you I have never sat in toilet water.

Why do we not hear about the toilet seat status being a problem among men? Consider that when two or men are sharing a bathroom, sometimes the toilet is used seat up and sometimes down. Why aren't men raving about making a splashdown?

Is this sort of "I don't need to look; it'll be just the way I left it" thinking routine in a woman's life? Does she check out the position of their office chairs before sitting? Or does she sometimes sit on the arm or bump her butt into the back of the chair, making it scoot forward so that the woman eventually slides on down to the floor. Do they back their cars into the driveways without checking to see if the garage door is up? Or do they bash their car into the door and then fume at their husbands for closing the door?

One of the changes that people must make when living with another person is being aware of small changes. For example, when I was a single person, I could spit my toothpaste into the sink any old time I wanted. But after I got married, I made extra sure that when it was time to spit, my wife was not leaning over the sink washing her face at the time. You might call me a sensitive husband for not spitting toothpaste into the back of my wife's head, but I just think of it as common sense. A woman living by herself might have been lulled into complacency knowing that the seat will be as you left it, but if it's that important maybe living with a man is not for you.

So will someone please tell me what in the world is the big deal???

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Author: wrnglrjan Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38891 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 2:30 PM
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So will someone please tell me what in the world is the big deal???


Now, bear in mind that I'm married, and I'm not one that gets obsessive over this particular thing -- though I did go through an obnoxious nagging period when he seemed to have trouble remembering to raise the thing before taking not-so-careful aim.


The 'big deal' is:

(1) "Down" is the "put away" state for a toilet seat. It's just custom. It's like ... uh ... putting the tailgate up on the truck, or closing cabinet doors or returning your tray table to the upright and locked position. :) If it's up, it's yet another example of "messy" -- don't know about you, but I need fewer of those in my house, not more.

(2) The underside of the toilet seat is often not all that pleasant to look at, people. The seat itself stays relatively clean, but the underside ... ick. We all know it's there between cleanings, but nobody really wants to look at it. It's like displaying an enlarged photograph of what the inside of the shower drain looks like.


Jan
hoping this helps

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Author: GardenStateFool Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38894 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 2:53 PM
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So will someone please tell me what in the world is the big deal???
Admittedly, my DH is extremely good about this. Too good, sometimes, as he grew up in a house with pets and learned to close the regular AND top lid of the toilet to forestall it becoming a drinking fountain. And while it's not nearly as eye-opening to sit down on a closed lid, it's still unnerving at 2AM.

Which, basically, IS the big deal, at least for me... staggering into the bathroom at whatever time of night, not turning on the light for fear of a) blasting out your own vision for the next hour and a half and b) waking your partner, often means that the visual is afterthought at best.

OTOH, having one's fanny dunked in freezing cold water, feet dangling in the air while you frantically attempt to haul oneself out of the bowl by clawing at the vanity, is definitely guaranteed to wake one up for quite a long period of time.

It only has to happen ONCE for it to get to be quite a big deal!!!!

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Author: Darkflinx Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38899 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 3:12 PM
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It's not like a splash-down can happen for most women. They're kidding themselves if they think their butts are gonna fit in that bowl...


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Author: ColonelCAF Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38907 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 5:55 PM
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Yuh said, "OTOH, having one's fanny dunked in freezing cold water, feet dangling in the air while you frantically attempt to haul oneself out of the bowl by clawing at the vanity, is definitely guaranteed to wake one up for quite a long period of time. It only has to happen ONCE for it to get to be quite a big deal!!!!"

Yuh 'membered me of de tam dat de lil boy of wan ouah clost friends, 'bout four or two year ole, got up in de middle of de night 'n had to pee. Since he was now a "BIG BOY" he could go by himself. He wandered into the living room and promptly peed all over his Jimmy Jet!!!

DeKernal


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Author: averagjoe Big funky green star, 20000 posts Top Favorite Fools Top Recommended Fools Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38908 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 6:11 PM
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"So your wife wants you to urinate with the seat down?"

James Brown:

I make this stuff up for fun... you didn't for a moment think I was serious, did you?

I'm in total agreement with everything else you said though.

~aj

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Author: SirTas Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool CAPS All Star Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38915 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 9:02 PM
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I've observed nany different toilet customs in various countries. When I vistited DW's mother, at her house in Japan, she had two little rooms, one marked MEN and the other marked WOMEN. The men's room had a urinal--and that's all. But the women's room had a toilet with the seat permanently down. Women always used that room, and men used it when they had to. (Somehow that seems like a pretty sensible solution to the situation.)

It was winter, and outside it was snowing, but that permanently-down seat was heated. (Another sensible idea!)

--SirTas

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Author: silverwing008 Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38916 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 9:04 PM
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It was winter, and outside it was snowing, but that permanently-down seat was heated. (Another sensible idea!)

Any setting above 4 or 5, watch out!

Rump roast for dinner!

s'wing ;0)

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Author: foolme1111 Big gold star, 5000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38920 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/15/2003 11:19 PM
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It was winter, and outside it was snowing, but that permanently-down seat was heated. (Another sensible idea!)
_______________

I guess that's easier than moving the plumbing indoors. But if it's outdoors, why have a urinal for the men? Isn't that redundant? Besides, it's more fun to write in the snow.


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Author: JannyGruenig Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38924 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/16/2003 2:05 AM
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So will someone please tell me what in the world is the big deal???

well....I myself don't make a case out of it,or have a problem with it, but for me....I would say....it is just my sense of "order and esthetics"!!

A toilet seat down...looks more "esthetic" (if it can ever look esthetic??) as a toilet seat up!! LOL

So maybe that's what's the other women's problem! But...like I said.....I don't make a case out of it!

;-)

Janny

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Author: JonBeer Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38939 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/16/2003 12:41 PM
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The 'big deal' is:

(1) "Down" is the "put away" state for a toilet seat. It's just custom. It's like ... uh ... putting the tailgate up on the truck, or closing cabinet doors or returning your tray table to the upright and locked position.


Not in my house it's not. I'm a guy and live on my own. The most used position is up, so that's where it stays. If someone puts it down though, I don't make a big deal of it (unless it's someone who makes a big deal of making sure I leave it down at their place!) I just move it to the most useful position for the current operation next time I'm there.


(2) The underside of the toilet seat is often not all that pleasant to look at, people. The seat itself stays relatively clean, but the underside ... ick.


My god, what sort of household do you run? I'm a single guy living alone without a maid, and I manage to keep the bottom of MY toilet seat clean! What's wrong with you? Maybe if you left it up, you'd notice when it was getting dirty, so you could clean it before it got so "ick"?

Jon
Hoping this helps (but still enjoying telling mum to leave the seat up when she's done... while she's under my roof she'll live by my rules!)



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Author: Draggon Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38940 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/16/2003 1:08 PM
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enjoying telling mum to leave the seat up when she's done... while she's under my roof she'll live by my rules!

LoL... You go, boy!

Draggon

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Author: GardenStateFool Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38943 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/16/2003 1:24 PM
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Yuh 'membered me of de tam dat de lil boy of wan ouah clost friends, 'bout four or two year ole, got up in de middle of de night 'n had to pee. Since he was now a "BIG BOY" he could go by himself. He wandered into the living room and promptly peed all over his Jimmy Jet!!!

DeKernal


Funny, you remind me of when my husband's fraternity brothers did something very similar after a long night of drinking... ;-)

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Author: JonBeer Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38944 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/16/2003 1:47 PM
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DeKernal

Funny, you remind me of when my husband's fraternity brothers did something very similar after a long night of drinking... ;-)


Funny, he reminds me of the way I type after a long night of drinking.... ;-)

Jon

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Author: SirTas Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool CAPS All Star Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38961 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/16/2003 10:50 PM
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It was winter, and outside it was snowing...

I mean outside the house it was snowing. These MEN and WOMEN rooms were in the house. (But the only heat in those little rooms was the plug-in heated seat in the WOMEN's room.)

--SirTas

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Author: foolme1111 Big gold star, 5000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38963 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/17/2003 12:07 AM
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I mean outside the house it was snowing. These MEN and WOMEN rooms were in the house. (But the only heat in those little rooms was the plug-in heated seat in the WOMEN's room.)

--SirTas

______________

I was pretty sure that was what you meant, but there was enough ambiguity that I couldn't resist having a little fun at your expense.

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Author: Minifig Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38973 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/17/2003 12:34 PM
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wrnglrjan: (1) "Down" is the "put away" state for a toilet seat. It's just custom. It's like ... uh ... putting the tailgate up on the truck, or closing cabinet doors or returning your tray table to the upright and locked position. :) If it's up, it's yet another example of "messy" -- don't know about you, but I need fewer of those in my house, not more.

(2) The underside of the toilet seat is often not all that pleasant to look at, people. The seat itself stays relatively clean, but the underside ... ick. We all know it's there between cleanings, but nobody really wants to look at it. It's like displaying an enlarged photograph of what the inside of the shower drain looks like.


If this is the case, then why is it an equal crime to put the lid down?
It seems that both up is bad, for reasons you have listed, but my wife hates it when I put the lid down at the same time as I put the seat down.


Cib

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Author: Moonage1962 Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38978 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/17/2003 2:44 PM
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If this is the case, then why is it an equal crime to put the lid down?

When I get the seat complaint, the lid always goes down with it. Makes em know what it feels like having to lift the silly thing every single time they gotta pee. Then, I like to complain about no one putting the lid down. I mean, even though women might be offended by a seat left up, NO ONE wants to see what's in the toilet. So why leave it up? It's put there for a reason. We've got a infant, do you really want him playing with that water? I mean, he LOVES water. Be considerate of the baby and put the lid down. And if you're not gonna do that, then I don't want to hear any complaints about leaving just the seat up.

Moon


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Author: karenlj Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38980 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/17/2003 2:52 PM
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So why leave it up? It's put there for a reason.

I always put the seat down so the cat won't fall in.

Karen

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Author: karenlj Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38981 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/17/2003 2:53 PM
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So why leave it up? It's put there for a reason.

I always put the lid down so the cat won't fall in.

Karen
sorry for the typo

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Author: Minifig Big red star, 1000 posts Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38982 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/17/2003 3:06 PM
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I'm sorry, did you say something?
I was staring at your balloons.


Cib

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Author: karenlj Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38984 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/17/2003 3:14 PM
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I'm sorry, did you say something?
I was staring at your balloons.


Cib


Ohmigosh! I never even noticed! Thank you!

Karen


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Author: MizL Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 38987 of 167491
Subject: Re: My wife, the inventor inventor Date: 9/17/2003 3:42 PM
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Oh, yes. Tell mrs.aj this is the mother of all inventions. Perhaps she could patent this one!



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