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Author: cliff666 Big funky green star, 20000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 19372  
Subject: Not retired yet, but Date: 11/24/2005 1:02 PM
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... come December 22 (actually 31, holidays, doncha know) I shall be. My FIL sent this list for the prospective retiree:

Q. When is a retiree's bedtime?
A. Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch or in front of the TV.

Q. How many retirees to change a light bulb?
A. Only one, but it might take all day.

Q. What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
A. There is not enough time to get everything done.

Q. Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
A. The term comes with a 10% percent discount.

Q. Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
A. Tied shoes.

Q. Why do retirees count pennies?
A. They are the only ones who have the time.

Q. What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
A. NUTS!

Q. Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
A. They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

Q. What do retirees call a long lunch?
A. Normal

Q. What is the best way to describe retirement?
A. The never ending Coffee Break.

Q. What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
A. If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

Q. Do retirees ever get a vacation?
A. Yes, two of them. Each six months long.

Q. Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
A. He is too polite to tell the whole truth.

cliff
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Author: iamdb Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 10215 of 19372
Subject: Re: Not retired yet, but Date: 11/24/2005 3:08 PM
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cliff,

I endorse everything on your FIL's list.

My wife and I have gotten into habit of napping during the day, I in the afternoon, she after dinner. We go to bed 1 - 2 AM and wake at 8 AM. I really look forward to those days when our calendar is clear with no visitors and nowhere we must go (Tuesday the housekeeper, Friday take mom to have her hair done, etc.).

We enjoy reading and walking; we TiVo the good things on HBO, Showtime, and the networks to watch when we want; I especially enjoy listening to music on our rather high-end stereo (nearly all of which I bought used on audiogon.com at about 10-20% MSRP). My mom gave us an elliptical trainer as an early Chrismas present, and that adds good health to the daily routine. Of course, it doesn't hurt that we live a block from a beautiful beach and close to excellent restuarants and shopping.

I think you'll enjoy retired life. We were FI long before we RE (at 56); looking back, I don't know why we waited so long.

db
Montecito, CA

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Author: Grumpybiker Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 10216 of 19372
Subject: Re: Not retired yet, but Date: 11/24/2005 5:02 PM
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cliff666: <...Q. What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
A. There is not enough time to get everything done...
>

This is actually very true!
I often find myself with too little time to get done everything I had intended, and rarely find myself with "extra" time on my hands!

I usually like to take a nap between 1000 Hours and noon, but often don't get the chance because I have too many projects going on.

Now that winter is here, it will let up a little. No tree planting, grass mowing, fish watching, etc.
It will start up again in the Spring. I have plans to build a shed for the riding mower, next to the house, and another one down by my pond.

Aah, looking forward to a nice, restful winter.

Regards,

Grumpy

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Author: ImAGolfer Three stars, 500 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 10217 of 19372
Subject: Re: Not retired yet, but Date: 11/24/2005 6:28 PM
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... come December 22 (actually 31, holidays, doncha know) I shall be.


Hey Cliff. A little pre-mature congratulations. You're going to love retirement.

Regards,

ImAGolfer (retired '03)

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Author: wcfenton Big red star, 1000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 10218 of 19372
Subject: Re: Not retired yet, but Date: 11/25/2005 12:45 AM
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Q. What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
A. There is not enough time to get everything done.

-----------------

This is very true! It is amazing how what I used to get done in a weekend now takes me at least the entire week. I think that it is a combination of motivation (or lack there of) and a failure to give a priority to anything that sums up the problem. Or, maybe it isn't a problem at all. Who cares if you get something done or not? I don't! Oh well...what were we talking about anyway??

Regards,
Bill


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Author: GringoFool Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: 10219 of 19372
Subject: Re: Not retired yet, but Date: 12/2/2005 4:56 PM
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Grumpy: I usually like to take a nap between 1000 Hours and noon, but often don't get the chance because I have too many projects going on.


It's all a matter of priorities. Being somewhat of a sleepyhead, naps are pretty far up there on my list of "things to do".



G.F.


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