A Foolish Interview with AmandaHugginkiss
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|The Fool:||Make a confession.|
I sleep with DanielPanda. He's such a cutie. He doesn't like it when I say that though--he thinks he is aesthetic perfection; the ursine yin and yang incarnate; which somehow cute just doesn't capture.
One more thing--I love TMFTwitty! Yes, I love him! I feel so free now that I've said it! Woo-hooo!
|The Fool:||What has been your best work experience, and what made it so great?|
Well, I've been reading the job listings on TMF. I see they've got a foosball table, and I really love foosball. I'm not good at it or anything, but it's about the most fun you can have without violating laws regarding crimes against nature, except for go-karts.
But I digress. So it seems TMF has this Financial Analyst position, which is basically what I do now. It used to be really cool where I worked; no foosball but monthly keg parties in the summer. But now it's all bureaucratic, and there are reorgs every month, they don't involve layoffs, although I wish they did, so I could collect unemployment; mainly they're just needless juggling of numbers and allocations for no productive purpose. Now I find out that the new cubes are all of four feet high, so I get to stare at all my lifeless co-workers. Dilbert has gotten much funnier lately as my life progressively resembles it. I especially like one I read recently, where Dilbert asks for questions after his presentation, and one guy stands up and screams, "HOW DO I GET THE BOREDOM OUT OF MY HEAD?!"
You may have guessed that this doesn't do wonders for morale; in fact, every day at lunch I get to listen to my boss gripe about something. Whatever.
So every night I go home depressed, only to cheer myself up with my liquid homemade Prozac and wine, which would make everything OK except that lately my kidneys have started to hurt in the morning, so I'm thinking maybe I need to cut back?
So maybe I'll just become TMFAmanda, but I wanted to retire to my farm in a few months, and I'm way overpaid where I am now, which I guess will have to go to pay for the kidney transplant . . .
|The Fool:||Your greatest fear? Any neurotic ones (agoraphobia, triskaidekaphobia, etc.)?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||Do I have any that AREN't neurotic? Let's see . . . I fear I won't die a glorious death. I have an irrational fear of the telephone. Actually, have you ever read "The Bear Went Over the Mountain"? The bear's agent had a lot of irrational fears. I'm a lot like that.|
|The Fool:||What's your favorite activity (within the realm of good taste)?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||Good taste, eh? I guess picking my nose in the closet is out . . . hmmmm . . . . I really love the Fool. I don't know why. I just feel this spiritual connection with everyone here. Especially Cheeze. He's got the most lovely cyber-aura. It's just beautiful, man.|
|The Fool:||Tell us about Your Dumbest Investment... and the lesson you learned from it.|
I love you, a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck . . .
In other matters, I used to sit in my Music Theory class and read the score to "Fugue for Tinhorns". I'm only so-so at reading music, but that was a very attractive piece to read.
|The Fool:||What other financial products or services do you use?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||I have a checking account and a credit card. I have an ATM card that I used once--that is, the spouse used it. I've never used an ATM and I'm not about to start now. I like to go into the bank and get cash from the tellers. They're nice friendly people, and they need jobs too. It's getting to the point where the only people that tellers see are robbing them. Amanda will singlehandedly counter that trend.|
|The Fool:||Tell us about your first date. Who was it with and where did you go? (Remember, this is a family show!) ;)|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||It was at the roller rink; on the way home the windows got steamy even though we didn't actually kiss.|
|The Fool:||What's the best restaurant you've ever been to? (Include name, location, and average bill for two.)|
I go to McDonalds at lunch because I just know I'm going to get Boardwalk. Usually I get the grilled chicken, large size fries and coke, and an apple pie, and the spouse gets the Quarter Pounder, large size fries and coke and an apple pie, and we get our daughter the 4 piece Chicken McNuggets, although mostly she likes to eat the fries. In Montréal, they had McPizza which I also like. The total bill is usually about $12.
So far no luck on Boardwalk, although I did get a free cheeseburger, a free breakfast sandwich, and three Reading Railroads.
Update: Didn't get Boardwalk, but I had this thought the umpteenth time I ate McDonalds: You kind of figure they print lots of Park Places, but only one Boardwalk, so the poor slob that gets Boardwalk doesn't have to buy too many dozens of Cokes to get a Park Place too. But what if they did it differently? What if there were only, say, 1,000 Park Places? Then the Boardwalk winner would be very unlikely to get a Park Place via their own consumption. Thus, there would be a bidding war amongst Park Place holders to sell their Park Place to the Boardwalk dude. So the issue is, what would the winning bid for a Park Place be? Is it dependent upon the number of Park Places issued, within reason?
These are the issues I've been pondering.
|The Fool:||What's one of your special talents?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||I can totally ignore the phone when it rings. I play more instruments badly than most people play well. I didn't see "E.T., the Extra-Terrestrial" until 1989. I can use left- or right-handed scissors.|
|The Fool:||What's your greatest athletic achievement? Little League champ? Ran a marathon? Did 4 consecutive sit-ups?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||The one time I went skydiving my parachute didn't open, so I went into a nosedive, and broke my fall with my beefy arms. I was a little sore the next day, so I went easy at the gym.|
|The Fool:||When you aren't working or sitting in front of the computer, what occupies your time?|
I have a nice collection of instruments and McCormick spices. I like to find applications for 11" x 17" paper. I grow roses. I account for my financial matters in a compulsive manner. Oh wait, that involves sitting in front of the computer.
OK, for those who are wondering, here are the collections:
Instruments: bamboo flute (2), bodhrán (2), digeridoo, guitar, harmonica, harp, mandolin, mountain dulcimer, rainstick, recorder, tambourine, tinwhistle, vox humana, windchimes (2), xylophone. Next acquisitions are likely to be hunting horn, úillean pipes (an Irish style of bagpipe), harp of aeolus (windharp), steel drum, and gong.
McCormick spices (in the nice glass jars): basil, bay leaves, black pepper (crushed AND whole), chili powder (hot), chives, cinnamon, cloves, curry (mild), garlic, ginger, lemon peel, mustard, nutmeg, onion, oregano, paprika, parsley, poppy seed, red pepper, rosemary, tarragon, thyme. Non-McCormick spices include allspice, coriander, dill, marjoram, mint.
|The Fool:||What's your favorite Fool message board?|
It's La Maison Derrière d'Amanda--Amanda's house-o'-love (not a literal translation):
|The Fool:||Given a second chance, what financial decision would you like to do over?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||I don't think I ever would have obtained a SSN or filed tax returns. It's so much better in the underground economy.|
|The Fool:||Share with us your best money-saving secret -- cutting coupons, sneaking candy into the movies, shopping on Wednesday and pretending you're over 65?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||OK, I get free long distance and free internet. Also, I can get fabric wall coverings at cost. Finally, I have a lot of firewood.|
|The Fool:||If you had to pick an existing song title that best describes your life, what would it be?|
"Her Majesty" is too obvious. How about "Thus Spoke Zarathustra"? Also, for bombastic symphonic music, I like "Mars: Bringer of War".
There's also "Loser", Beck.
|The Fool:||As you were growing up (or now, raising children), did your family have any distinctive rituals or practices others might do well to emulate?|
Sometimes we had pancakes for dinner. One time I was forced to eat ham and scalloped potatoes, which I didn't like, and later that night I heaved. I remember feeling a little sick before I went to bed, as I was watching "Dukes of Hazzard".
My dad used to take us to all the bars he frequented. One time that I'll never forget, he gave me advice that I've kept close to my heart ever since: "Mandy, don't ever leave a drink unfinished".
|The Fool:||What's the best product you use that most people don't know about?|
I have quarters from DE and PA, and I even have bicentennial quarters!! Top that, losers! Weep for what you lack!!
Oh yes, I also have regular quarters. I don't have any silver quarters though. Feel free to send me yours.
|The Fool:||Have you had a brush with fame, the proverbial '15 minutes'? Tell us about it.|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||My group in ninth grade science made a video on the water cycle. It featured a claymation remake of "Bambi Meets Godzilla". Sadly, a movie career did not follow.|
|The Fool:||Tell us about your greatest personal success, not necessarily finance related.|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||I am three-fifths on my way to becoming a roadkill ace. My most recent success was a couple of months ago, after a very long eight year dry spell.|
|The Fool:||What's the strangest thing you've ever seen?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||Let's just say I don't like to keep mirrors in the house.|
|The Fool:||What's the best advice you've ever received?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||You have to take your finger off the penny you put on the train tracks before the train gets there.|
|The Fool:||Did Lee Harvey Oswald act alone?|
|AmandaHugginkiss:||I have a difficult time caring.|
|The Fool:||Is the best way to fight terrorism through aggression or passivity (or do you have another option)?|
Maybe I'll be there to shake your hand
Maybe I'll be there to share the land
That they'll be giving away
When we all live together.
No, you can't have my land. No, I don't have an extra bedroom either.
|The Fool:||What's been your best investment to date and how did you discover it?|
My best investment was marrying my spouse, because I lived off their salary for several years.
Other than that, my best investment has been the time I have spent at the Fool! Oh, how can the joy that has filled my life for these many months; indeed years, ever be justly expressed in the clumsy medium of language? Nay, nay, it cannot be done. Still, the effort must be made; the journey, arduous though it may be, undertaken: for to speak of the Fool to all those in darkness is surely the only recompense that can be offered to satisfy the great indebtedness of my soul to those whose tireless toil has brought unto the world this superlative resource.
|The Fool:||List some of your favorite websites, with running commentary where appropriate. (Please provide the URLs, too.)|
Nothing I love better than a good book:
Doesn't get much better than Mairéad--she can really tear it up.
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