No. of Recommendations: 0
My settlement from the car accident on 07/10/12 is as follows: $34,863.42 to the health insurance company, $22,928.50 to Boswell hospital for the hospital lien, and $20,000 cash to me for pain and suffering. The total of the settlement is $77,781.92. There are no lawyer fees as I did not hire a lawyer to represent me.

Once the check arrives it will take 10 days for the bank to clear the check. My intention is to buy many shares as I can of Chase common stock
and reinvest the div.
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No. of Recommendations: 27
My intention is to buy many shares as I can of Chase common stock
and reinvest the div.


For the love of Pete -- dedicate $1,000 of the settlement to serve as an emergency fund and checking account buffer. Take this, the new year, as a fresh opportunity to introduce some safety and sanity to the tightrope you call your financial life.
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No. of Recommendations: 16
I really need to stop reading your posts.

You need to pay. off. your. debts.
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No. of Recommendations: 5
10 day hold on an insurance check? I deposited a personal check for more money and my bank put on a 3 day hold.

If you are paying interest on debts, pay those off before gambling....I mean investing in the stock market.
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No. of Recommendations: 32
Once the check arrives it will take 10 days for the bank to clear the check. My intention is to buy many shares as I can of Chase common stock
and reinvest the div.


Why are you not going to pay off your $13k car loan?

Oh, wait, you're trying to make money from arbitrage, because you are getting a 2.8% yield from JPM, while your car loan is 'only' costing you 2.49%.

But after taxes, you are going to be losing money. Even if the 15% tax rate survives the fiscal cliff, adding on 3.36% or 4.24% Arizona state tax, you will lose 18% or 19% from your 2.8% dividend rate, so you will net, at best 2.3% - which is less than your car loan rate. And if the Federal rate on dividends does go up to ordinary income rates, it will probably be a 28% or 29% loss to taxes, netting you about 2.0%

But wait, there's more....

Paying off your car loan with the $20k (assuming the other money is actually going to the insurance company and hospital), and using the other $7k of the money as an emergency fund would mean that you wouldn't be able to post your quarterly debt updates any more because your debt would actually be paid off and you wouldn't be living paycheck to paycheck any more. But that would actually be being financially responsible.....

AJ
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No. of Recommendations: 2
My intention is to buy many shares as I can of Chase common stock
and reinvest the div.


Even if you could afford to do this (with your debts, you can't, that is, you shouldn't), why in heaven's name would you put all your money in one stock? DIVERSIFY! How about a dividend-paying fund with a variety of stocks. After you pay off your debts.
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No. of Recommendations: 8
10 day hold on an insurance check? I deposited a personal check for more money and my bank put on a 3 day hold.

Yeah, but you probably have an average daily balance in your account that's higher than $25

AJ
- has deposited larger checks with either no hold or a 3 day hold
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No. of Recommendations: 25
Once the check arrives it will take 10 days for the bank to clear the check. My intention is to buy many shares as I can of Chase common stock
and reinvest the div.


Remember this post?

http://boards.fool.com/got-the-ok-to-go-back-to-work-from-my...

Remember when you had to go back to work even though you were in pain, because you didn't have an emergency fund and apparently no STD? Remember that? And you had to work because you had to pay those credit card bills? We remember, even if you don't.

Wouldn't it make more sense to clear the credit cards, put some money aside for emergencies, (including paying off the car if that becomes necessary) and then investing the rest?

We remember the pain, even if you've forgotten.

Nancy
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No. of Recommendations: 0
LLRinCO"I deposited a personal check for more money and my bank put a 3 day hold." Some banks have different hold policies.


"If you are paying interest on debts, pay those off before gambling....I mean investing in the stock market. "


car rate 2.49% pmt $112.00 every two weeks
secure stock loan 2.30% $58.00 every two weeks will be paid off on January 24, 2013.
Chase Freedom $633.00 still in grace period of 0% interest
Chase Slate $433.00 balance transfer offer 0% 12 month repay goes to 8.9% after that.
American Express Blue:-$100.00


My paycheck will be $10 less on first check of the month because of health insurance went up. My second check of the month is $27.00 less because of insurance and I put more money in the health savings account in a savings account.
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MacNugget: "For the love of Pete -- dedicate $1,000 of the settlement to serve as an emergency fund and checking account buffer. Take this, the new year, as a fresh opportunity to introduce some safety and sanity to the tightrope you call your financial life. "

If Mom and Dad saw me having $1000 in checking they INSIST I take them to dinner everynight, buy this that at Home Depot, Walmart, JoAnns, Michael's stores, Fry's food, Safeway. The money would be gone real fast. The answer to that is NO WAY AM I GOING TO DO THAT AGAIN.
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No. of Recommendations: 3
My paycheck will be $10 less on first check of the month because of health insurance went up. My second check of the month is $27.00 less because of insurance and I put more money in the health savings account in a savings account.

============================================

There is also the 2% increase in Social Security tax that is going to reduce your net.

We have yet to hear what the Federal income tax witholding rates will be.
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No. of Recommendations: 17
...NO WAY AM I GOING TO DO THAT AGAIN.

It's unfortunate you think "THAT" refers to having an emergency fun.

In reality the "THAT" which you shouldn't ever do again is the part where you spend your emergency fund on frivolous things just because your parents insist.

What's wrong with just not sharing your bank statements with your parents? Or, at a minimum, telling them "no?" The money will only be gone if you spend it on non-emergencies.
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No. of Recommendations: 0
AJ"
Why are you not going to pay off your $13k car loan?

Oh, wait, you're trying to make money from arbitrage, because you are getting a 2.8% yield from JPM, while your car loan is 'only' costing you 2.49%.

But after taxes, you are going to be losing money. Even if the 15% tax rate survives the fiscal cliff, adding on 3.36% or 4.24% Arizona state tax, you will lose 18% or 19% from your 2.8% dividend rate, so you will net, at best 2.3% - which is less than your car loan rate. And if the Federal rate on dividends does go up to ordinary income rates, it will probably be a 28% or 29% loss to taxes, netting you about 2.0%

But wait, there's more....

Paying off your car loan with the $20k (assuming the other money is actually going to the insurance company and hospital), and using the other $7k of the money as an emergency fund would mean that you wouldn't be able to post your quarterly debt updates any more because your debt would actually be paid off and you wouldn't be living paycheck to paycheck any more. But that would actually be being financially responsible.....


WAIT HOLD UP MAN I disagree entirely.

I pay pmts on the car so I don't have to give the money to mom and dad. It keeps my credit rating up. I'm not paying the car off.

Currently balance at Schwab: 1) Individual account = $24,727 2) Rollover IRA =$17,209 3) Roth IRA $24,798 4) 401K = $35,437

CD's at Sunwest FCU: $7,400
CD at Nationwide Bank $503.00
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No. of Recommendations: 1
I pay pmts on the car so I don't have to give the money to mom and dad. It keeps my credit rating up. I'm not paying the car off.
========================================

Paying off the car would not reduce your credit rating...making payments does not increase it.
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No. of Recommendations: 25
WAIT HOLD UP MAN I disagree entirely.

I pay pmts on the car so I don't have to give the money to mom and dad. It keeps my credit rating up. I'm not paying the car off.


As long as you allow your parents to control your finances, you will never be able to be financially responsible, then.

I get that there are advantages to both you and your parents for you to live with them. But maybe you need to change the arrangement. Even if you don't feel like you can/should move out - maybe you could pay your parents an agreed upon amount each month/paycheck for room and board, in exchange for not having to show them the details of your finances.

Even if your car loan were paid off tomorrow, the improvement that you get on your score for having an installment loan with on-time payments will remain for another 10 years. And actually having a paid off loan installment loan, instead of one that you are still making payments on is better for your credit score.

AJ
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No. of Recommendations: 0
Even if you could afford to do this (with your debts, you can't, that is, you shouldn't), why in heaven's name would you put all your money in one stock? DIVERSIFY! How about a dividend-paying fund with a variety of stocks. After you pay off your debts.

Ok porfollio at Schwab

12 BAC+L
137 F+A (Ford Preferred 7.5% Notes)
728.7179 JPM
1000 par BANK OF AMERICA 5.85%25INTERNOTES DUE 11/15/25
1000 par BARCLAYS BANK 3.25%24FMED TRM NT DUE 07/26/24
2000 par GEN ELEC CAP CP 4%32MED TRM NT DUE 09/17/32
1000 par MORGAN STANLEY 5.5%21MED TRM NT DUE 07/28/21
1000 par SLM CORP 5.40%23EDNOTES DUE 03/15/23
1000 par SLM CORP 5.50%29EDNOTES DUE 06/15/29
2000 par SLM CORP 5.70%29EDNOTES DUE 03/15/29
2,356.7048 HBAN (HUNTINGTON Bank)
103.3107 USB (US Bank)
44.319 Schwab Health Care Mutual Fund
323.2754 American Express
5.25 BAC +E
7 DDT
25.204 F
133.2121 HIG
1,349 LQMT
4 MER+M
10 SCHD
11 SCHH
29 SCHB
1000 par SLM CORP 5.75%29EDNOTES DUE 03/15/29
Vanguard
90 Vanguard Health Care fund
237 unit Vanguard International Annuity
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No. of Recommendations: 5
If Mom and Dad saw me having $1000 in checking they INSIST I take them to dinner everynight, buy this that at Home Depot, Walmart, JoAnns, Michael's stores, Fry's food, Safeway. The money would be gone real fast.

About this. AJ already covered the part about a regular rent payment, but if for some reason that won't work, we're not saying you have to keep the emergency fund in the checking account. I keep mine in a couple of different places, including an online savings account and a money market at Vanguard. You could easily hide the emergency fund if necessary. It's money that is set aside for emergencies. In fact, I bet that most of the posters here who have emergency funds don't keep that money in the checking account.

Heck, you could even keep it in cash and hide it somewhere.

Is this what's been stopping you? Your parents having access to your checking account?

Nancy
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No. of Recommendations: 7
Wow, that portfolio is heavily slanted toward financials and healthcare.

Sorry, doesn't look all that diversified to me. And adding another chunk of JPM is not going to make it more diversified.

AJ
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No. of Recommendations: 3
If Mom and Dad saw me having $1000 in checking

Why are your mom and dad looking at the balance in your checking account?



they INSIST I take them to dinner everynight, buy this that at Home Depot, Walmart, JoAnns, Michael's stores, Fry's food, Safeway. The money would be gone real fast.

Why would you spend money on them that you need to, I don't know, SURVIVE?



The answer to that is NO WAY AM I GOING TO DO THAT AGAIN.

Then put the money into an account that they don't know about and save it in case you need it.

Acme
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No. of Recommendations: 19
You have a toxic relationship with your parents. They're intentionally trying to keep you in some way financially dependent on them (such as by needing a roof over your head) so that you forever remain in a child-like state in the relationship. That isn't healthy, nor normal.

I stayed with my mom for 5 years in my early 30's to relocate to the DC area, pay off debt, and build an e-fund and home downpayment. She didn't charge me rent because her house is paid off, she liked my company, and the reason of me staying there was to build up savings. She never would have asked I spend money for "wants" for her instead of building a solid financial footing for myself. I have a couple other friends who have stayed with parents at some point in their adult lives and it's the same - they could always stay with parents/in-laws to help get themselves on better financial footing.

If you can't move out because you don't have enough savings and you can't save because they open your mail - then get a P.O. Box so you can keep your mail private, and have statements sent there. And then pay off debt, build an e-fund, build somekind of housing fund, move out and then invest. It doesn't sound like you're getting ahead in life - and it's not because of something like a car accident - it's because you're speculating/gambling with your finances instead of taking the steps necessary to get out of debt and build long-term savings.
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No. of Recommendations: 3
If you can't move out because you don't have enough savings and you can't save because they open your mail - then get a P.O. Box so you can keep your mail private, and have statements sent there.

or convert to paperless.
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No. of Recommendations: 1
Paying off the car would not reduce your credit rating...making payments does not increase it.

Having varied credit does help with credit rating. Keeping the car loan for awhile (but not the full duration of the loan) might help with credit score.
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No. of Recommendations: 4
Having varied credit does help with credit rating. Keeping the car loan for awhile (but not the full duration of the loan) might help with credit score.

The OP already has multiple other installment loans (car and savings secured) as well as credit card loans reported on their credit report. Installment loans continue to count toward 'varied' credit for as long as they are reported (7 years after payoff for loans with negatives; 10 years for loans that are free of negatives). In the OP's case, continuing to make payments on this loan is unlikely to 'improve' their credit score.

AJ
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No. of Recommendations: 5
By the way, about this: My paycheck will be $10 less on first check of the month because of health insurance went up. My second check of the month is $27.00 less because of insurance and I put more money in the health savings account in a savings account.

Has it occurred to you that if you pay off the credit cards that your cash flow will be better? You'll have extra money from not having to pay the credit card companies and you won't be pinched as much?

PAY OFF THE CREDIT CARDS FIRST

It doesn't matter what the rate is, you need to get rid of that debt to ease the crunch as more of your paycheck gets eaten up. We're talking about less than 10% of the check from the insurance company. It's a better investment than you'll get from your stock.

Nancy
probably still being ignored.
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No. of Recommendations: 5
If Mom and Dad saw me having $1000 in checking they INSIST I take them to dinner everynight, buy this that at Home Depot, Walmart, JoAnns, Michael's stores, Fry's food, Safeway.

401,

I don't understand this at all. I suppose all of us have different relationships with our parents, and while mine would never greedily look at my bank accounts, even if they did, I could and would say no (unless they needed something more than I did).

Why are you in thrall to your mom and dad?

Pete
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No. of Recommendations: 13
Has it occurred to you that if you pay off the credit cards that your cash flow will be better? You'll have extra money from not having to pay the credit card companies and you won't be pinched as much?

PAY OFF THE CREDIT CARDS FIRST


It doesn't really matter if the OP pays off the credit cards, since the OP insists that any money in the checking account will just get spent anyway at the insistence of the parents. Then, when the OP does run into issues again, and need some of the money that was already spent, they will just charge the cards back up and come back here posting about living paycheck to paycheck. Until the OP becomes financially responsible for themselves, instead of letting their parents run their financial life, or until the OP tires of posting, we are going to continue to see the same drama over and over again.

AJ
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No. of Recommendations: 4
Ok porfollio at Schwab

When it comes to claimed parental financial influence, how is it somehow workable to have a stock portfolio, and CD's, but not an emergency fund and paid-off debt?

That doesn't make sense. It seems more likely the parents are offered as an excuse for those financial suggestions (debt payoff, emergency fund) the OP doesn't want to accept.
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No. of Recommendations: 5
It seems more likely the parents are offered as an excuse for those financial suggestions (debt payoff, emergency fund) the OP doesn't want to accept.

If his parents actually read his bank statements, or spy on his accounts, or subject him to cross-examination about his money habits, then there are certainly ways around this, and we've pointed them out. Money market accounts, a Post Office box, online savings accounts, and so on would all help hide his savings. And we don't put our emergency fund in checking accounts. At least, I don't, and I expect that most of you keep them in various accounts just as I do.

But, back when he was recovering from that accident, he said he'd bought a 2008 Nissan Sentra, and said he supposed that we would yell at him for not buying a brand new car, which is so utterly the opposite of what we would do that I wonder if he even understands what we are saying to him.

http://boards.fool.com/update-30184000.aspx

Nancy
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No. of Recommendations: 2
Once the check arrives it will take 10 days for the bank to clear the check. My intention is to buy many shares as I can of Chase common stock
and reinvest the div.


The stock market in total is currently highly valued.
At some point during the next decade, valuations will go back to historic averages, possibly to below normal.
Between now and then, returns will be negative. Possibly deeply negative.
That will effect even seemingly good values such as Chase.
There is no reason to be invested right now.
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No. of Recommendations: 2
If Mom and Dad saw me having $1000 in checking

And how are they going to find out?

they INSIST I take them to dinner everynight, buy this that at Home Depot, Walmart, JoAnns, Michael's stores, Fry's food, Safeway. The money would be gone real fast. The answer to that is NO WAY AM I GOING TO DO THAT AGAIN.

Tell them NO. You could also respond to every request/demand with "No, thank you." And don't explain or justify your answer. Just keep repeating "No" or "No,thank you." until they leave you alone.
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No. of Recommendations: 29
Windowseat,

You wrote, If his parents actually read his bank statements, or spy on his accounts, or subject him to cross-examination about his money habits, then there are certainly ways around this, and we've pointed them out. ...

I think there's a bit more to it than this...

I would bet his parents feel he owes them because he is living at home at their expense. I also suspect he can't keep his mouth shut when he has money in the bank and it's not simply them being nosy. And I bet they feel getting him to buy them things when he has money is their just reward for letting him live there when times are tough.

And of course some parents get addicted to the petty power that comes from manipulating their children and don't want to lose their control over them... And some children enable this behavior.

In any case if he can't deal with it, he could get out and get an apartment. And if they really wanted to be fair with him, they'd ask them to pay room and board instead of asking for lots of petty items in repayment. And if he wanted to be fair, he'd offer rent even if they didn't ask. If nothing else, it would give him the moral high-ground to refuse when they ask for him to buy them things with his money. Instead he could respond by repeating his offer for rent to divert the issue.

But of course I'm expecting all parties to act rationally ... which might be a bit too much to expect.

- Joel
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No. of Recommendations: 4
I think there's a bit more to it than this...

Oh, definitely. MetroChick already pointed out that he has a toxic relationship with his parents, and apparently that's a mild term for it.

If he (or maybe it's a she) isn't paying rent, then rent should be paid. No matter where you live you're going to have some sort of housing expense, and if he isn't paying for room and board he should be. As you said,it gives him moral grounds to not pay for little extras all the time.

But, paying rent and examining expenses, putting money aside for an emergency fund, paying off debt before investing, making sure that there's enough money in the checking account to cover all the bills, and all the other suggestions we've made are all part of a sound financial plan, and apparently that's not something he's interested in.

Nancy
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No. of Recommendations: 4
Windowseat,

You wrote, If he (or maybe it's a she) isn't paying rent, then rent should be paid. ...

Well... I certainly think there are times when it might be appropriate for parents to give a child free room and board. But if they start asking you to buy them personal cr*p, then it's probably time to discuss paying rent or moving out.

- Joel
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No. of Recommendations: 2
then it's probably time to discuss paying rent or moving out.

I used to have these horrible battles with my mother because I wanted to pay rent and she didn't want to accept it.

But she didn't want me to spend money on her, either. Beating her to the restaurant bill took slick timing.

Nancy
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No. of Recommendations: 2
Once the check arrives it will take 10 days for the bank to clear the check. My intention is to buy many shares as I can of Chase common stock
and reinvest the div.


Pay off your debts and then invest. Keep in mind that paying off your debts will make it easier for you in the long run to invest more money in the market, if that's your ultimate plan. The less you hae to pay out in interest to credit cards and loans, the more actual money you'll have available to invest in whatever stocks you choose.

Personally, I wouldn't lump everything into Chase, as I believe it's important to diversify as much as you comfortably can.

If Mom and Dad saw me having $1000 in checking they INSIST I take them to dinner everynight, buy this that at Home Depot, Walmart, JoAnns, Michael's stores, Fry's food, Safeway. The money would be gone real fast. The answer to that is NO WAY AM I GOING TO DO THAT AGAIN.

Why on earth would you let your parents see the balance of your checking account? You're an adult. Act like one.

That said, put $1000 in an online, password protected savings account and know that if something like this happens again, you won't be left with no income and totally dependent on your parents while you can't work.

LWW
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No. of Recommendations: 3
If his parents actually read his bank statements, or spy on his accounts, or subject him to cross-examination about his money habits, then there are certainly ways around this, and we've pointed them out. Money market accounts, a Post Office box, online savings accounts, and so on would all help hide his savings.

Can't he just hide the savings in an online brokerage, wherein he holds shares of readily marketable stocks? I mean yeah, it's subject to market ups and downs, but he could always yank a thousand bucks out of it and have it back into his local account just as fast as some of those other options. So why is everybody suggesting the money ought to be designated as an emergency fund specifically? I mean the kid lives with his parents and has about a hundred thousand dollars saved up. The only meaningful designation that ought apply is whether he can lay his hands on funds in one day or three days.

xtn
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No. of Recommendations: 8
I mean yeah, it's subject to market ups and downs, but he could always yank a thousand bucks out of it and have it back into his local account just as fast as some of those other options. So why is everybody suggesting the money ought to be designated as an emergency fund specifically?

Because his investments are untouchable. Did you read that first link I posted? He was in pain, absolutely miserable, but he had to go back to work because he had to pay his credit cards. He was not willing to withdraw the money from his account to pay a current bill. I don't care where he keeps the money (except that I don't recommend keeping it in the checking account, particularly if his parents snoop) but I think he should keep an amount aside, even if it's just mentally, to be used in dire situations. I also think he should pay off the credit cards, especially since they don't really amount to much, but apparently he's unwilling to do that.

As I said, I keep my emergency fund in a couple of places, including an online savings account and a money market at Vanguard, which is where my 401(k), my IRA, and my Roth IRA live. (I have another 401(k) elsewhere). It's money that I keep out of my checking account, mostly because I don't want to view it as money that can be spent.

But he's not willing to do that. Every penny he makes goes to investing. I get that he doesn't think much of his parents' spending habits, and he's trying to protect himself from a penniless old age, but I really think he's pushed too far in investing, and isn't willing to look at his financial habits as a whole.

Nancy
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No. of Recommendations: 1
I mean yeah, it's subject to market ups and downs, but he could always yank a thousand bucks out of it and have it back into his local account just as fast as some of those other options. So why is everybody suggesting the money ought to be designated as an emergency fund specifically?

Because his investments are untouchable. Did you read that first link I posted? He was in pain, absolutely miserable, but he had to go back to work because he had to pay his credit cards. He was not willing to withdraw the money from his account to pay a current bill.

I doubt that distinction is one of investment account versus mattress envelope. He just doesn't consider being painfully miserable as enough motivation to spend money he already has. Maybe I'm wrong though. Maybe his irrational mind won't allow him to violate some unnecessary code of earmarking. Now that I think about it that seems not only possible but in fact likely. So you are probably right.

xtn
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No. of Recommendations: 19
Can't he just hide the savings in an online brokerage, wherein he holds shares of readily marketable stocks?

If s/he were willing to do so, yes. In the past, the attitude has been "Everything in the brokerage account MUST BE INVESTED" and "Once purchased, investments CANNOT BE SOLD to generate cash for emergencies/expenses"

I mean the kid lives with his parents and has about a hundred thousand dollars saved up.

Yes, but s/he is unwilling to spend anything on expenses other than money directly from their paycheck. Which is fine, until you get severely injured in a car accident, and would be physically better off taking a leave of absence and, because you have no short term disability coverage, you would not get a paycheck for a few weeks. But because you're not willing to spend anything from the 'savings/investment' pile, you go back to work before you should. If there had been a few thousand in a designated 'emergency fund' that could be used when an actual 'bad thing' (like a car accident) happened, then maybe the OP would not have risked their health to return to work.

And this drama occurs EVERY TIME there is any expense (car repairs, doctor's bills, new tires, etc.) that's not readily covered by the paycheck, followed by savings secured borrowing to pay the expense off, adding to the expenses that the already limited paycheck must cover.

Yes, it's crazy for someone who has $100k in savings and investments to force themselves to live paycheck to paycheck, and borrow money for expenses that should be foreseen (like car repairs, doctor's bills, new tires, etc.), just so they don't touch any of their savings/investments. But that's what this poster has chosen to do. And since they have then chosen this forum to rant about their mostly self-inflicted financial troubles, we get to rant back.

AJ
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No. of Recommendations: 13
Can't he just hide the savings in an online brokerage, wherein he holds shares of readily marketable stocks? I mean yeah, it's subject to market ups and downs, but he could always yank a thousand bucks out of it and have it back into his local account just as fast as some of those other options. So why is everybody suggesting the money ought to be designated as an emergency fund specifically? I mean the kid lives with his parents and has about a hundred thousand dollars saved up. The only meaningful designation that ought apply is whether he can lay his hands on funds in one day or three days.

Because he is a hoarder, but instead of hoarding tiny porcelain kitties or dead parakeets, he is hoarding stock. It's obsessive behavior, not rational risk assessment.

Lara Amber
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No. of Recommendations: 6
And since they have then chosen this forum to rant about their mostly self-inflicted financial troubles, we get to rant back.
Or just ignore him.

From here on out, he's on "ignore" for me. Either this is all one big hoax, or he is incapable of learning from his mistakes.
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No. of Recommendations: 1
From here on out, he's on "ignore" for me. Either this is all one big hoax, or he is incapable of learning from his mistakes.

Go ahead make my day press the Frown button on me and ignore me. I actually don't give a damn if you do or don't.
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snip ", because you have no short term disability coverage, you would not get a paycheck for a few weeks."

FYI at the time of the accident I did have short term and long term disabilty insurance. I still have that coverage thru my employer.
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No. of Recommendations: 3
Windowseat,

You wrote, Because his investments are untouchable. ...

This can have much further reaching consequences. If you can't sell your investments (or your CDs?) ever, how do you ever retire - especially if that investment isn't paying you what you need in income? And how do you deal with your losing bets (LQMT)?

If you're young and just investing today, most companies on the stock market are going to fail before you retire. In my opinion if you tend to buy and hang on forever, you should be in funds (preferably ones that also generate income, because you're eventually going to need that) and shouldn't be making long-term bets on individual companies.

At some point you have to be able to touch your investments ... or what's the point?

- Joel
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No. of Recommendations: 0
At some point you have to be able to touch your investments ... or what's the point?

1. Dividends
2. Handoff to the next generation

ThyPeace, or so I was taught in my family's finance 101, which goes like this: "Never, EVER, EVER spend your principle. Make your principle work for you and provide you income."
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401k sounds pretty young. While I know he's not likely to do it, my single best financial decision was to pay off all my debts and say out of debt at a young age.

The peace of mind I now get from knowing I have money far outweighs the various ignorant comments I get from family, friends and (ex)girlfriends.

401k seems to have a pretty good nest-egg. Think how much better it would be without debt. The increased cash flow would allow you to get out from under the thumb of your parents, and really increase your net worth.
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The increased cash flow would allow you to get out from under the thumb of your parents,

I'm beginning to suspect that he has lied to his parents about his salary, and they are supporting him in several ways, including free room and board. That's why he doesn't want them to find out that he actually is putting most of his salary into investments. If they knew he had a decent salary they would ask him to pay rent, and he doesn't want to do that, because then he couldn't save as much money.

I hope I'm wrong on this, and that he really is paying them rent and isn't costing them anything. Or perhaps he is paying a small rent, but not enough to cover what he's costing them in terms of utilities and food.

Nancy
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snip:"I hope I'm wrong on this, and that he really is paying them rent and isn't costing them anything. Or perhaps he is paying a small rent, but not enough to cover what he's costing them in terms of utilities and food."

Mom and Dad told me when I sold the condo in Scottsdale to help out with buying what is on the shopping list and buy my meds,insurance, phone,aand dr. bills and help out with the bill at the restaurants when we go out.

snip;"I'm beginning to suspect that he has lied to his parents about his salary, and they are supporting him in several ways, including free room and board. That's why he doesn't want them to find out that he actually is putting most of his salary into investments. If they knew he had a decent salary they would ask him to pay rent, and he doesn't want to do that, because then he couldn't save as much money."

I send Mom and Dad email confirmations from Chase, and AX when I pay online. I show then receipts when I pay the car and secured loan with Sunwest.

I let Dad know when I buy and sell at Schwab.

I put 6% of my pay into a Roth 401k.
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snip:"401k seems to have a pretty good nest-egg. Think how much better it would be without debt. The increased cash flow would allow you to get out from under the thumb of your parents, and really increase your net worth. "

Not really I'd like the account to be $100K Currently 401k at work is $36,000.

If pay off the car I have no money in case I have to goto the hosptial again .
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At some point you have to be able to touch your investments ... or what's the point?

1. Dividends
2. Handoff to the next generation


I actually spend my BAC+L div and pay cc debt and buy gift cards for brother, his partner, mom and dad.

If I were to die my brother gets the money. I asked that the talked to Chuck to go over positions.
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Mom and Dad told me when I sold the condo in Scottsdale to help out with buying what is on the shopping list and buy my meds,insurance, phone,aand dr. bills and help out with the bill at the restaurants when we go out.

And this allows them to take advantage of you, according to you:

If Mom and Dad saw me having $1000 in checking they INSIST I take them to dinner everynight, buy this that at Home Depot, Walmart, JoAnns, Michael's stores, Fry's food, Safeway. The money would be gone real fast. The answer to that is NO WAY AM I GOING TO DO THAT AGAIN.

and

I pay pmts on the car so I don't have to give the money to mom and dad....I'm not paying the car off.

Again, if you and they would change your arrangement so that, for instance, you agree upon a set amount of room/board per month, and when you go out to eat/to a movie/show/etc., you would do something like either split the check each time, or trade-off on who pays each time, you could actually become a financially responsible adult.

Until then, you are going to be stuck as a child who is forced to spend your money on whatever your parents want, when they want it. Further, you apparently are willing to remain in debt to financial institutions so you can 'shield' your money from having to spend it on your parents.

You are not demonstrating the behaviors of a financially responsible adult.

AJ
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Mom and Dad told me when I sold the condo in Scottsdale to help out with buying what is on the shopping list and buy my meds,insurance, phone,aand dr. bills and help out with the bill at the restaurants when we go out.
I send Mom and Dad email confirmations from Chase, and AX when I pay online. I show then receipts when I pay the car and secured loan with Sunwest.

I let Dad know when I buy and sell at Schwab.

I put 6% of my pay into a Roth 401k.


Good. I'm glad I was wrong. It just sounded so odd when you said you didn't want your parents to know you had extra money because they would demand that you spend it on them. But you may find it easier if you gave them a rent payment every month. It may be worth discussing this with them.

Nancy
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If pay off the car I have no money in case I have to goto the hosptial again .

The credit cards?

Pretty please with sugar on top?

Nancy
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If pay off the car I have no money in case I have to goto the hosptial again .

You are getting $20k for pain and suffering. You have a $13k car loan. You would have $7k left after paying off the loan, plus an extra $2,912 every year (your required every 2 week payment of $112) to add to the $7k. If you religiously put that payment into a savings account started with the $7k, you would get back up to the $20k in less time than it will take you to pay off the loan.

And it doesn't really matter if you 'have' money in case you have to go to the hospital again. You have already indicated that you will invest the money and you have demonstrated won't spend any of your investments or CDs anyway, even when you go to the hospital.

AJ
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Mom and Dad told me when I sold the condo in Scottsdale to help out with buying what is on the shopping list and buy my meds,insurance, phone,aand dr. bills and help out with the bill at the restaurants when we go out.

"Help out with buying what is on the shopping list" and "help out with the bill at restaurants when we go out" are both really vague and could come to more than the extra expenses you cause your parents. I couldn't live long like that, with unknown expenses under someone else's control hanging over me.

(a) I presume they wouldn't move to a smaller house if you weren't there, so charging you for the physical space doesn't make sense to me.

(b) The extra utilities you use (water, electricity, faster internet?...) probably doesn't exceed $100/month. Food may be more like $200-250/month, depending on what & how much you eat. I computed this number as best I could when my brother lived with us for 6 months a few years ago. I can't remember the figure, but whatever it was, that's what he paid me every month. He moved to our mother's when he left my place, and I suggested she charge double as it was nearly summer and he likes a lot of A/C and Mom buys a lot of takeout, which costs more than cooking from scratch. (aside: I wanted my guest room back for other visitors).

(c) IMO, the 3 of you should go to the trouble of determining what your additional expenses actually are and pay that. Possibly work some of it off in the form of chores and/or errands instead, Or move out.
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Just chiming in here, having had adult kids live at home before...

Every family's different. I (as a parent) probably wouldn't enter into something that loose, asking my kid to help out with what's on the shopping list, eating out, and their own expenses, but it would depend on what everybody expected to get out of this arrangement.

If the goal was for the kid to move into their own place, I'd want a good chunk of change as rent, to get them used to paying their own living expenses, and to put back for deposits and such later, to facilitate them moving out. And I'd be very clear that it wasn't "rent" as much as a tool to gather them a stake, and to discourage getting used to "extra money."

I wouldn't want my kid to get the idea that since they paid for the space, they could live just like they would if we weren't under the same roof.

And that sounds awful...I know one of ours complained bitterly about our "rules" about no computer after 11:00 on weekdays, and oh, his internet friends said we were horrible, and didn't we realize he was an adult, and who the heck were we to infantilize him, etc.

The computer room was right next to our bedroom. The clicking keyboard, light from the monitor, getting up at 2:00 to rummage for a snack, interfered with our sleep every single night (that we allowed it). But that part, the reason for why we had these "rules"...that never got shared with friends. We weren't trying to keep him a child...we just wanted a *******decent night's sleep on work nights. He could have been paying us $1000 a month. We still would have wanted things "our way" in some areas.

If my kid had goals, like living on their own, but kept doing behaviors that were against those goals, I'd probably get pretty pushy about "well, what are you doing with your money?? I want to see some evidence every month that you're doing what you agreed to do. If you're buying widgets instead of working towards your goals, we have a problem."

Even if the widgets might be income-producing, or worth a lot of money some day. I think I'd be saying "buy your appreciating widgets when you've met your goal of being out on your own. This isn't the time and it's not our agreement."

Now, if the deal is that the kid moved in to keep me from hiring a live-in caregiver or something, that's different. And I might say "forget about rent. Help me with my health problems, and buy some groceries and meals, and it's win-win." But I'd want that to be real clear up front.

Not sure about the bank statement thing under those circumstances. In general, if a kid (and I'm talking anyone in the next generation, regardless of age) is asking me to look at their financials and give advice, I'm going to point out what I see as a problem. And if my money is going to said kid's expenses, it's going to be hard to bite my tongue when I see money spent on things I don't understand.

Families can agree to all kinds of quirky things to function, and that's great. But when either party starts changing things (and I have no idea what the original agreement was, or what context it was in) there's going to be problems.



cm,
BTDT
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I presume they wouldn't move to a smaller house if you weren't there, so charging you for the physical space doesn't make sense to me.

Sometimes it's not about the *cost* as much as it's about the *worth*. It might not cost anything to have someone live with you, beyond a few bucks in increased utilities, but the worth is determined by the parties involved.

A spare bedroom in my house, with food for one, might cost $200.

It would take much, much more than that for me to let someone move in that room. The privacy would be worth a lot more than the cost of $200.

cm
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Every family's different. I (as a parent) probably wouldn't enter into something that loose, asking my kid to help out with what's on the shopping list, eating out, and their own expenses, but it would depend on what everybody expected to get out of this arrangement.

Casual agreements work best when both parties act like responsible adults.

My SS lived with us for a few years after college. He was responsible for his expenses. If he didn't like what food was available, he could buy what he wanted. We thought it was better for him to save for a downpayment than pay us rent. There was no drama over the arrangement.
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One of the things that may make the OP's situation different in living with his parents is that I believe he has posted in other threads that he is bipolar and I believe takes medication and is under treatment (which I gather he is paying for from what he posted). This may impact his living with parents and the nature of the cost sharing.
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Not really I'd like the account to be $100K Currently 401k at work is $36,000.

I know your id is 401kinvestor, but you really need to look at more than just your 401(k). Your Schwab account has $95.8k (at yesterday's closing prices) in stocks and mutual funds, plus another $10k (par value) in notes/bonds. Add in the Vanguard account and the 401(k) account at work, and you're probably closer to at least $150k, although I have no idea how much the annuity that you have at Vanguard is worth.

AJ
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