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Author: DollarIQ Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 308349  
Subject: Re: Gifting to sister: told me so? Date: 9/13/2005 4:05 PM
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Some of you long term followers of this board may remember a thread I started on how to responsibly give my sister with money problems a financial gift. I can't find the original posts to link to, but here's a summary:

For reference, I found your previous thread going back to February 2004, here:
http://boards.fool.com/Message.asp?mid=20352588

Everyone else has responded much better than I could have. Right now, I just want to wish you good luck and hope that eventually everyone else comes out okay. Your sister, assuming she's about 33 now, I'm hoping she'll learn her lesson within the next year or so, instead of in a decade or so. She can still recover more readily from serious financial problems by 40, than she will at 50. I'm sad to think she's burning away some very significant income-producing years of her life by making extremely costly (not just financially, but socially) mistakes and acting like an overaged free-spirit and like she has no understanding of the real consequences of her negligence and irresponsibility. She's been cushioned all her life by enablers: for one, your own guilt-ridden mother (who I think is severely codependent) and by 'Berkeleyesque' community. Being cushioned is fine, but if like landing on a trampoline she thinks it's all painless thrills and chills, I think it would serve her well if the trampoline was pulled out from under her and she fell hard on her own.

The upcoming divorce proceedings, being pursued by a lawyer, and hopefully no one to protect her might be the turning point in her life that she needs. She's no Cinderella and I hope her dream prince doesn't come through the door to sweep her away: This is real life hitting everyone else, but her free-spiritness has been her lifelong excuse to deny personal responsibility and accountability. If everyone walked away from her and didn't need to feed her narcissism, maybe she'll start paying attention to what she needs to do instead of what she wants to do.
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