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Only a Southerner knows how many fish, make up "a mess."

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction
of "yonder."

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is -- as in:
"Going to town, be back directly."

Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for
the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl
in the middle of the table.

All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use
the term, but they know the concept well.

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near"
and "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be
1 mile or 20.

Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a
redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.

A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an
adverb.

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines. We talk to
everybody!

Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissy fit and a
conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're
related, even if only by marriage.

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old
ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, "Bless her heart"
and go your own way.

And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long
time, ya'll need a sign to hang on ya'lls front porch that reads "I ain't
from the South but I got here as fast as I could."

Bless ya'll hearts and ya'll have a blessed day.
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Not a Southerner, but I know that "sugar booger" has nuttin' to do with anyone's nose, and unlike many Southerners, I know what a Mudflop Sandwich is.

~aj
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