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While I agree with you I really don't think this was the case here (and I'm taking your post out-of-order):
First, choose trips that you have the equipment, conditioning and experience to do in good style.

The OP had a poor experience here because she lacked the experience to choose a suitable trip. Hopefully that will be remedied in the future.

Cycling outings aren't an egalitarian experience. That goes for hiking, backpacking, climbing and a lot of other outdoor activities. You need to be prepared for the activity that is planned.

While I agree but:

I don't find it surprising that an obviously overweight person on a poor fitting bicycle who also happened to be inexperienced in riding on dirt roads and in traffic, and inadequately conditioned for heat, humidity, altitude and endurance is going to excite some comments.

I might add to that list lack of experience in choosing a suitable tour.

It's unfortunate when people sign up for outings when they lack the experience, equipment and conditioning to do properly. I've had that happen as a trip leader, and it's burdensome for the leader and impacts what the rest of the group can do.

Reallyalldone really DID plan for this tour. We had this entire thread where she discussed conditioning, conditions and more. How may of us have planned for a trip by riding 30 miles a day three days a week at altitude?
Training, people. I'm having a good week(been riding the Cape Cod Rail Trail and staying near the middle). The tours I am doing are mid-July and mid-Sept and have 3 distance/elevation choices a day. Depending on the elevation, I would like to do 40-50 miles a day.

I've done 30ish 3 times this week with 2 of them on consecutive days(I learned a little about fueling after that first day nonconsecutive first day.) While my legs are a bit tired on the second day, the real issue is seat time. If I want to extend my seat tolerance, do I want to bike more often or do longer distances?

Heck, I'm a little overweight too, but DW and I did 76 miles over two days last weekend because we do bike regularly.

Then, and this is where my problem REALLY lies, she took a tour with a group that I've been salivating to save my money and use. THIS is supposed to be the absolute first class. After you look at the site, look at their prices AND their invitation to singles. Also, the bikes are described as among the best in the world.

I get their brochures and there are pictures of ALL people who look like DW and me, and I'm guessing Reallyalldone. It's outrageous prices because they "have three guides and two vans."
Multiple daily routes give you the freedom to access the best of a region at your own pace. Every day of every trip we provide a variety of well-researched options which are displayed on the Web and include mileage and elevation change. Every option comes with directions and is fully supported.

Two vans, three leaders, thoughtful trip design, multiple route options with directions and a choice of riding companions—each and every person is supported equally, regardless of ability.

I don't need to be her apologist, but I just don't know how a "normal" person could have done it much better and I think she was being perhaps unneedingly humble to take part blame.

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