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That's a fair statement. The only apt comparison I can come up with is that God exists on a higher plain than we do. Just like we exist higher than the animals or microbes. God is infinitely higher than us. Since we are created, he can end us if he chooses. We may not like it, but if you accept that he is always just, then what he is doing is for the best. We can't or know what the best is. This mind bending argument is something each person has to decide for himself. Been there myself. In fact, I debated with myself, with other people, read books for almost 2 years before God opened my eyes. I remember very distinctly when it happened. I remember asking (praying I guess if you consider any kid of talking to God 'praying') to God that I wanted to know the truth. 2 years of earnest searching. It was partly a mental exercise but much, much more a supernatural whammy the day I accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior. After that, there was no going back.

Fair enough. Not believing in god myself, I can't use that as my own ethical guideline. But it sounds like you've found a way to reconcile it within the framework of your beliefs. I respect that.

Just and FYI, CC is a woman.

Ah. Thank you, and my apologies to CC for the assumption.

Would I have made the same decision if conditions had been differently? I can't really say. But it changed me.

I don't think any of us can say what we'd do under other circumstances. But it sounds like you made decisions that you're very happy with. I think that's wonderful and I'm sincerely glad it worked out well for you.

Though I will point out that your story is an example of why neither a belief in abstinence (I'm assuming your wife was taught abstinence) nor birth control (I'm hoping you used some or at least intended to) are guarantees that pregnancies won't occur. Yes, prevention is by far the preferred method. I don't think anyone would argue that. In fact, that's why many of us would like to see birth control more easily accessible. Particularly to people of lower incomes who can least afford a pregnancy. (Yes, that needs to be a separate discussion rather than make this thread even longer. But for many of us it's all tied together: fewer abortions will require more birth control.)

I would agree that it is not moral either. Perhaps unethical is a better term, especially if the child is abused.

As an atheist, the terms "moral" and "ethical" are interchangable to me.

All I can do is teach my 1 remaining daughter and my future grandchildren right from wrong.

Isn't that all anyone can do? Though I'm sure you're doing a better job at it than many.

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