This is one item that shows how little the two of you are communicating. Does that she is bartering time for the lessons make any difference to you?Agree. I think it also shows that the OP really needs to track expenses line by line. You don't really know where your money is going if you thought you were spending 200 bucks on lessons and you weren't! Track it all, write it down, figure out what you are really spending money on and then go for the low hanging fruit first. See if you can get within your means. Then when everybody is on board, start cutting into the hard stuff. I'm not going to touch the marriage stuff because I'm not married but my cousin tells me it is hard work and I believe her. I think your general attitude towards her can't help.
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