No. of Recommendations: 10
this thread is so long its making my head hurt!!! Thanks for those of you that gave support and those of you that are trying to get me to see other views. I know I have to get past the anger and "do" something about the situation. The point is there is only so much pressure a person can take. I have been "doing" everything. If I get a job he'll spend more I am sure of that. He has done that since I started babysitting and ebaying. There is nothing I can do on my own to bring in more money. If I made $80,000 a year he would spend it so I might as well make next to nothing. If someone gave us $100,000 right now it wouldn't help. Money won't help. Its his attitude that needs help. He needs to help with the finances and get some goals. I truly have asked him over and over what he wants and I have yet to get a straight answer. He doesn't care. When we had a lot of money he didn't care....its not becasue we are broke that he stopped caring. He neverhas, its only worse because I couldn't dig us out of the hole this itme. And I forgot to elaborate on my debt. $5,000 is just the credit cards and they continue to climb I had to buy groceries this week. We have $9000+ on the vehicles we are upside down on. We have an $80,000 mortgage and I currently have no health insurance. We have 2 cats, 2 dogs, a parrot, a fish tank and a deer fawn to take care of. (And please don't start with the get rid of the pets thing I don't need that right now.) While my world is crumbling I do not need to hear about which one of my babies to get rid of. I know it will be reality soon, but I'll go insane to worry about that right now along with everything else.

Booa- I have had panic attacks my whole life and have been hospitalized because of them (also another aspect of me staying at home, I had trouble keeping jobs before due to the attacks that would come on anytime and sometimes I'd actually faint) and while medicine is helping, they are back in full force, but have always been a part of my life so I am used to them, But thanks for the support on that I really shouldn't be having them so much.

So I guess I'll end this thread. I really have done everything in my power to fix things. I have supported my husband through all the spending for years, but have come to the end of my rope. I look at his side and try to understand. I know we need help and I am willing to go to counseling and try to fix it. I know this is not all his fault, there must have been things I could have done sooner. I never changed the rules, I did all I could to fix things when he did. I refuse to be sh@t on anymore. For those of you who think I am being immature and not doing all I can.........come on over and walk a year in my shoes. I promise you you'd quit too. I am not playing the victim, I actually am one and there is only so much a person can handle. I'd actually have been better off being a single mother all these would be stressful and hard, but at least I'd know that I had done everything I could for my kids, that they always came first, and I did not go on spending binges and come home with no food.

I am proud of all I have done and that I have hung in this long, and will continue to do so if I can. I'd stay married forever if he could provide the basics for the family like he promised. At least before I never had to worry about food and shelter. Now that will weigh a person down. There is normal stress and financial problems and then there is the stress of knowing we have 4 wheelers and guns and NO FOOD. I am proud of my attitude and my decisions. I admit I started this post angry as hell. I feel after 4 years of this I am entitled to a breakdown and a $6 latte.
Print the post  


UGC Disclosure Notice Regarding Credit Card Posts
Community board discussions about credit cards are not provided or commissioned by banks who may have advertising relationships with The Motley Fool. Responses have not been reviewed, approved or otherwise endorsed by the bank advertiser. It is not the bank advertiser's responsibility to ensure all posts and/or questions are answered.
TMF Credit Center
The Motley Fool Credit Center arms you with real tools and simple messages, that will help you in every credit situation.
When Life Gives You Lemons
We all have had hardships and made poor decisions. The important thing is how we respond and grow. Read the story of a Fool who started from nothing, and looks to gain everything.
Contact Us
Contact Customer Service and other Fool departments here.
Work for Fools?
Winner of the Washingtonian great places to work, and Glassdoor #1 Company to Work For 2015! Have access to all of TMF's online and email products for FREE, and be paid for your contributions to TMF! Click the link and start your Fool career.