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Author: CVSUSN Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 37586  
Subject: Time For A Little Humor Date: 11/19/2012 9:23 AM
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Just to start the week off right. Navy humor in particular.

The most interesting SWO in the world.

-He is always the stand-on vessel.



-Stars navigate by him.



-He always eyeballs it.



-He wears wash khakis under his NWUs.



-The equator crosses him.



-He has sailed the eighth sea.



-He got his SWO pin in two days. The first was spent checking in.



-Detailers ask him about their career progression.



-He doesn't dead reckon...he dead knows.



-He maintains a permanent no-shave chit signed by Adm Zumwalt.



-His ship's aren't INSPECTED by INSURV, they are ADMIRED.



-He won the annual TYCOM Shiphandler of the year award in 1996...twice.



-He doesn't call them Battle Orders, for by the time someone reads them, the Battle is over.



-The carrier does plane guard for him.



-Marine mammals avoid him.



-Clocks retard and advance to conform to him.



-He once conned a ship alongside an oiler.......while aboard the oiler.



-The CNO asks him for permission to carry on with duties assigned.



-He has caught a leviathan and a mermaid. He released them both, of course, and wished them well.



-Aviators ask him for stories.



-His NMCI account works flawlessly.



-He invented the MOBOARD.



-He is always on station.



-Dolphins taught him the sonar equation.



-He maintains the Secret Billet List.



-Lights the plant off by himself... from the bridge.



-His sea stories have changed foreign policy.



-He once won the Battle E for three different classes of ship in one year...while on shore duty.



-He caught a cold once. His ship sent a CAT-4 CASREP.



-He can carry an open coffee cup from shaft alley to the pilothouse without spilling a drop.



-CO's call him to report contacts.



-The Rules of the Road read, "Whatever this man wants".


He is... the most interesting SWO in the world!
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