To mmrmnhrm:Thank you for your wise words. We have dumb phones. She claims our plan is the best one we can get. We pay like 94 bucks a month for the two phones. Unlimited minutes.'Cash-only diet.' Amen. I love the idea and that is the way it used to be. . . The bank that has our first mortgage, already told me that he would not combine the two. He suggested I talk with the bank that has the second mortgage and see if they will combine the two. I imagine when they see our cash flow sheet . . . that will be about a 5 minute conversation... "Take care Mr. X. We would love to help you, but you are just too big of a mess now... Come back if and when you get your mess cleaned up."Do you really think someone would refi us even if its on just the first one? I'm not being a smart alec . . . I am just asking. Plus, we are ten years into this current one (1st mortgage) . . . I hate to reset the clock. We are only one year into the 2nd one . . . maybe we could refi that . . . but again . . . see above.I have a Vanguard S and P 500 Index Fund that is currently worth about 20K but a buddy of mine who teaches personal finance at a community college says that is "off limits". I imagine all of you here would agree with him on that?I'm working daily. I'm making as much money as I can and I am not spending any money on anything but the basics.I think the wife needs to step up to the plate, get a real job, quit buying so much junk at the grocery store and tell the girls that we have to take at least two years off of dance because "Mommy and Daddy made a lot of bad choices with money. We are trying to fix them and as soon as we do, you can pick one or the other . . . We apologize that are irresponsibility is causing you to have to mess an activity that you enjoy."
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