It is all well and good to tell people that walking in a big city like NYC is safe. It isn't. Life isn't safe. I would never counsel someone to do something that they don't feel comfortable doing. Especially if I don't know them.That being said traveling around the city can be safe.1) Know where you are going and walk towards it like you mean it.2) Do not make eye contact with people on the street unless you are trying to get their attention.(Do not smile)3) Wear what other people are wearing.4) Wear sturdy shoes.5) If a street is deserted, turn back and pick a street with people on it. Stay where there are people.I moved to the city in 1997, and I did not usually feel uncomfortable on the street. However, I am a tall, heavyset woman (with a mean expression).Summary: Big cities you don't know (not just NYC) can be dangerous.I have been walking with a petite friend in SF during the day when a man picked her out of the crowd and got loud and abusive. Fortunately, she isn't shy.
2) Do not make eye contact with people on the street unless you are trying to get their attention.(Do not smile)Do you find that works better? My personal opinion is to always look people in the eye with a confident look, but not to stare. If you make eye contact and then look away, as you would typically do, I would think people would be less likely to target you. However, if you cross the line and stare, someone may take offense and start the "What the heck are you stating at?" type confrontation. Maybe that is why you find it best to avoid eye contact.dt
I am a tall, heavyset woman (with a mean expression).Oh my God. WILL YOU MARRY ME?!?;-)JoeTall, skinny man (with a bemused expression).
DC is dangerous too, if you are in the wrong place. I think it's the murder capital again. And it is the road rage capital. But I go there all the time and it's fine. I love NYC. But I hate when I am shoved to the point of playing Red Rover. I am Obviously holding my daughter's hand, yet the people seem intent on breaking our grip on each other because they'd rather not be troubled to go around us. They get quite a shock when they ricochet off of us (rather than break our hold). And then they have to go around us anyway.
Oh my God. WILL YOU MARRY ME?!?;-)JoeTall, skinny man (with a bemused expression).Joe,Don't let Wild here you say that. I remember a post (or maybe just my memory) where some suggestions were made........Ex17
AHEM.. JOE B! I realize I didn't post for a week, but you do realize if you become single, I am next in line. Kindly stop dispensing your favors thinking I will not take heed. Besides all that, I gave up on LeRoy. wild L. :)never thought Joe B would be a "ho!"
I called Joe B on it immediately upon my arrival from the laundromat. I thank you for having my back, Ex. wild L. :)still perturbed at Joe and Mrs Joe is going to be REALLY mad!! :()
I must add a post script to all this talk about NYC. I've lived here only 9 years but I feel safer here than in many MUCH smaller towns in the US I've lived in.I had a sawed off shotgun pulled on me in Denver, CO. I had a bottle thrown at me as I was crossing a street in Houston, TX. I've had no serious incident orf any kind here. So NYC is no more dangerous than ANY city in the US.Just be aware of what's going on around you. I've found the people here very helpful and for the most part friendly. It all depends on what you "bring" to the situation.Don 't believe what you see in the movies or necessarily what' s on the TV. It's a great city and the people can be helpful and friendly.Richard
Wild,Between you and Mrs Joe, who would win? Ex17*if we sold tickets to that Joe and Wild could pay offdebt with the proceeds....
In the late 1980's I worked for a law firm in Rockefeller Center. Often I would be sent downtown to Probate court and Federal Court to get "Papers".If the client was rich I would take a cab,but often I would use the subway. I learned to cover any jewelry and never make eye contact. Later when my children would go to the City I would tell them to put a 20 dollar bill in their shoe,as well as not to make eye contact.Recently I made plans to meet my son&family in NYC. and he reminded me to put a twenty in my shoe(joke),but New York is much safer now and I use only cabs. ddrumm
I learned to cover any jewelry and never make eye contact.Making no eye contact is not just a safety thing. It's overcrowding behavior. I remember seeing a nature show once in which a bunch of monkeys, who normally roamed in a pen all day, would be put in a small "room" while they were being moved from one pen to another. They all stared straight at the door that was going to open on the other side, did not make eye contact with each other and didn't "speak" or socialize. It was like they were in an elevator.I definitely avoided eye contact in NYC when I was growing up there. I felt it was considered impolite and intrusive.Protomolly.
never thought Joe B would be a "ho!"I can't help it. I'm a Sagittarius! ;-)
Wait, wait, wait, if Joe B is single, does this mean his wife is available? ;-)--Booa (Joe, you're very very cute, but your wife is GORGEOUS)
Hee hee hee! I will have to tell her you think so. Yes, why she is with me is one of those mysteries of the universe. :-)Thanks!JoeWho in spite of his incorrigible flirting, may be the most happily married man in the world. :-)Wait, wait, wait, if Joe B is single, does this mean his wife is available? ;-)--Booa (Joe, you're very very cute, but your wife is GORGEOUS)
--Booa (Joe, you're very very cute, but your wife is GORGEOUS) Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm. I'll need pictures, please.sugarskianother Joe admirer.Wild, please move one millimeter to the side so I can at least see the guy! ;-)
I definitely avoided eye contact in NYC when I was growing up there. I felt it was considered impolite and intrusive.I dunno. I don't really agree with this. I've lived here for 15 years and no, I'm not going to be flashing jewelry on the subway or staring at people, but I'm definitely open to making brief eye contact and even exchanging smiles with other people on occasion. I'd hate to walk around with my head down, feeling threatened and isolated, all the time. That's no way to live, imo. I've found most folks here to be as decent and friendly as anywhere else. YMMV.sugarskiP.S. I have kids, so that changes things too- there's always some nice old lady (or cute young guy, or whatever) on the train smiling at them, playing peek-a-boo, etc. There was one creepy guy on the B the other day who was firing progressively-more-intrusive questions at my daughter: "Aren't you a lovely little girl? What's your name? Don't you have pretty blonde hair? Why doesn't your mom have blonde hair like you? Does your dad have blond hair?" but thankfully I hustled her off at the next stop. That's the first time something like that has ever happened, though people do smile at her and say nice things all the time.
Hee hee hee! I will have to tell her you think so. Yes, why she is with me is one of those mysteries of the universe. :-)Thanks!JoeWho in spite of his incorrigible flirting, may be the most happily married man in the world. :-)I wouldn't go that far, as to say it's a mystery of the universe. :-) I imagine you are both very happily married, and it's not a mystery to either of you, or to people who know you.--Booa
Okay, I have a free site, so DON'T EVERYBODY GO LOOK AT ONCE. ;-) If the site won't come up, try again in an hour.Actually I'm not sure if it's me or my wife you want to see. Deanna put my picture on her site...http://www.gimmeaminute.com/joe2000.jpg...and my wife is here...www.geocities.com/joebedford30/jill.htmlThanks!Joe
...and my wife is here...www.geocities.com/joebedford30/jill.htmlJoe, let me be the first here to sayWOW!I realize she was a professional photographer and all, but changing the f-stop and shutter speed don't make people this good-looking.Did I mention wow?I think you're cute and I love the mischievous sparkle in yours eyes -- but personally I don't think many people are looking at you when you're next to her. I hope she's as nice as she is beautiful.-- Laura
Believe it or not, she's nicer. :-} And she is completely oblivious of how beautiful she is. I feel like I won the lottery. :-DThanks!JoeI hope she's as nice as she is beautiful.
Joe, let me be the first here to sayWOW!I realize she was a professional photographer and all, but changing the f-stop and shutter speed don't make people this good-looking.Did I mention wow?I think you're cute and I love the mischievous sparkle in yours eyes -- but personally I don't think many people are looking at you when you're next to her. I hope she's as nice as she is beautiful.I have to agree with Booa and Laura.You look like you could be a lot of fun, but she's . . . hubba hubba!Ishtar
Sorry I just figured out how to read replies, BUT are you sure you aren't my husband?????Rocky
Sorry I just figured out how to read repliesWow, it's not often you see a reply to a thread from 15 months earlier. Happy to hear you have now learned how to read replies. :-)dt
I was pretty sick when I was pregnant and it didn't occur to me that my posting generated so much witty banter. If I had known I definitely would have been checking the reply section :)rocky
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