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If THEY Had A Jewish Mother"
> MONA LISA'S MOTHER: "After all that money your father and I spent on
> that's the biggest smile you can give us?"
> COLUMBUS' MOTHER: "I don't care what you've discovered, you still could
> have written!"
> MICHELANGELO'S MOTHER: "Can't you paint on walls like other children?
> Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"
> NAPOLEON'S MOTHER: "All right, if you aren't hiding your report card
> inside your jacket, take your hand out of there and show me."
> ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER: "Again with the stovepipe hat? Can't you
> wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"
> MARY'S MOTHER: "I'm not upset that your lamb followed you to school,
> I would like to know how he got a better grade than you."
> ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTHER: "But it's your senior picture. Can't you do
> something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something...?"
> GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MOTHER: "The next time I catch you throwing money
> across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!"
> JONAH'S MOTHER: "That's a nice story. Now tell me where you've really
> been for the last forty years."
> THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER: "Of course I'm proud that you invented the
> electric light bulb. Now turn it off and get to bed!"
> PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER: "I don't care where you think you have to go,
> man, midnight is past your curfew."
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