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Author: rehowes Big gold star, 5000 posts Old School Fool Add to my Favorite Fools Ignore this person (you won't see their posts anymore) Number: of 1948  
Subject: Re: Kids & Food Date: 5/22/2002 4:55 PM
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You may appreciate this post that I made several months back. The topic of kids not eating what was prepared came up and a (childless) poster said that if my child went hungry it was my fault - reh
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You ARE to blame if you give her food she won't or doesn't eat...

gb,

I'm sure that the parents on the board are rolling on the floor as they read this. I assure you, when you have a few years of parenthood under your belt your view will change. Trust me on this, I have six children.

Have you ever seen Bill Cosby's "children are brain-damaged" routine? Do you know why that is so funny? Because we parents have seen the illogic that he uses as material.

I do not recommend that you take my route and have six children. Your new bride may very well walk out when she gets fed up (hahaha) with preparing eight menus for each and every meal. But that's not all, she could maybe get over that by combining bulk food preparation, a good freezer, and the "reheat" setting on the microwave. Make sure that when she packs the leftovers in a freezer bag that she writes down what it is, when it was frozen, and WHO LIKED IT. That way she will be sure to only serve each child a meal that experience has shown the child likes.

But there is still a problem. The children are brain-damaged. Sooner or later (it will be sooner, trust me, probably the very next time) they will FORGET WHAT THEY LIKE. Mom has just made a custom meal with proven recipes that have been painstakingly matched to each child's taste, and the brain-damage creatures don't remember that they liked it only three days ago.

No problem, we can shuffle the selections. But Jill doesn't want THAT, it was on Johnny's plate. She doesn't care that he never touched anything, he BREATHED on it. And besides Johnny's peas are TOUCHING the hot dog bun. The meal is RUINED, Jill won't touch it.

While dealing with Jill's amnesia, you turned your back and Billy's BANANNA BROKE. Billy is three years old and a broken banana has no place in his world view. So you eat the broken banana and peel a fresh one.

HORRORS! You have 2% milk for Jill and Skim for Mark but you ran out of 1%. April is throwing a fit. She must have 1%, skim doesn't taste good, and 2% is fattening (Pete will never ask her to the Prom if she is fat).

You thought Johnny was ok with the hot dog but the other evening you went out to a Chinese restaurant. I'm sure you have seen the placemats that many Chinese places use that show the Chinese zodiac? Johnny was born in the year of the pig. He can't eat a hot dog, it CAME FROM A PIG!

Enough is enough, does anyone object to breakfast cereal? Looks good. Just last week everyone was complaining that you kept running out of Cap'n Crunch Crunchberries and you bought a whole case of it yesterday.

A dinnerplate brigade is organized and the plates are passed hand-to-hand past the garbage disposal and into the dishwasher. Out come the dishes and milk (three different octanes, mom rushed to the store for the 1%). You triumphantly return from the pantry brandishing two BRAND NEW boxes of Cap'n Crunch Crunchberries cereal.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, we're tired of that cereal.

We...want...LUCKY...CHARMS. (pound, pound)
We...want...LUCKY...CHARMS. (pound, pound)
We...want...LUCKY...CHARMS. (pound, pound)
We...want...LUCKY...CHARMS. (pound, pound)
We...want...LUCKY...CHARMS. (pound, pound)
We...want...LUCKY...CHARMS. (pound, pound)
We...want...LUCKY...CHARMS. (pound, pound)


Did I mention that it is YOUR fault?

Randall - NOTE I walked through this subthread and when the dw read the above quoted reply to my dinner story she .....

you got it... ROTFLOL
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