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Relationships / Divorce -- all about it


Subject:  Re: getting "divorced" Date:  2/12/2012  2:40 PM
Author:  Patzer Number:  2732 of 2759

I want to say is that I want to apologize for comparing my situation to actual divorce, my situation is not even close to as bad as an actual divorce...

There is no such thing as a typical divorce. Every single one is different, though there are some common themes. Some of those themes appear in your situation, as demonstrated by the replies about the cats and the stuff.

I'd be less harsh about the stuff. After my then-wife filed for legal separation, I bought some storage boxes and put most of her stuff in boxes. It took up a fair amount of space in my basement for quite a while, but at least I didn't have to look at it and trip over it all the time. Then when the time came to ship the stuff to her, it was all gone at once. Good riddance.

Living creatures are tougher than inert stuff. If you really dislike taking care of her cats, you want to push for finding a way for her to take them or for them to move to a new home. If you happen to like cats, you might think of them as your cats now.

My youngest daughter brought a cat home to my parents, and later moved out to a place that didn't take cats. Later she got married, and had 4 cats; but the stray she brought home stayed with Mom & Dad. I never figured out why that cat never moved out to be with my sister, but it wasn't my problem. Dad liked cats, and Mom tolerated cats that Dad liked.

The cat ended up outliving both of my parents. After Dad died, my sisters found it a new home with a friend; it still didn't go to my youngest sister's multi-cat household. Go figure.

Anyway, I agree with the other posters that if you don't want to take care of those cats forever you need to do something to close that possibility off. If you don't, you could drift into 20 years of owning a cat you didn't select, just like my Dad did.

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