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And just Who is Michael Read anyhoo?
===*===

Hey, HEY, HEY yer talkin' about the boss here, stalker of salmon, driver of big SUVs, entrepreneur, raconteur, stud fer sure and no less than the Canadian equivalent of Superman, or Captain Kangaroo, I ferget which. Why, without him there would be no Rabid Frisky Cheerleader Squadron and THEN where would you be? Huh? : Þ

Rabid Raggmopp
Chairperson
Give Read the statue committee


Add nail biter, Raggs. We're down to the stretch and now the real competition for The Feste Award Third Class with Palm Cluster is manifesting with DuckInMyShorts' nomination of DuckInMyShorts. My only competition, previously, was swimdad but he dropped out after the threats, un, persuasive augments, mailed to him with a fish attached. The same threat didn't work with DuckInMyShorts. Not that he is immune to threat but that he wrote back asking for a recipe and then wrote back asking if could he have another salmon because he, his wife and two kids, enjoyed the first.

As last year the offer of bribes has not been successful. I offered TMFSalena, a most attractive young woman by the way, roses, a dinner on the town, tickets for the Alexandrian Little Theater Play House's version of the Peloponnesian Wars, and she was laughing so loud she dropped the phone; Tom and Dave spurned my offer of washing their dog by claiming they don't have a dog and if they did they'd have to think twice about shipping the dog across the country to White Rock; my offer to TMFTwitty elicited this response: “Okay, you can wash the dog but if you want to get anywhere you'll have to wash the kids,” and I won't go that far because while the dog doesn't bite, Twit's kids do; and then there's this board's moderator, TMFBogey, the boy scout, who said that it would be unseemly to take a bribe and then proceeded to urge me to TP Bill Mann's workstation “just for fun,” and that means no consideration toward The Feste Award Third Class with Palm Cluster.

However, I do wish to thank all those who have participated in the effort and, particularly Raggs and his Rabid Frisky Cheerleader Squadron. Frankly, I don't know how he does it and especially with Darlene: 60-26-36 and is wheeled in a handcart to the functions. Fortunately, I was able to sell six quarts of turn-signal fluid to the blondes because when I asked for a date with them each individually laughed so loud she dropped her phone. What is it with this phone dropping when I call?

Seven days left. God made the world in the same time yet I think it will take far longer to persuade TMF I am worthy of The Feste Award Third Class with Palm Cluster.

Will I win it? I am not so sure because at last sighting no pigs were flying around TMF's HQ.

Oh, well.

MichaelR


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