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About 2002. When I was Wadaphooliam.

It’s been very slightly altered.

Movies never made (thank God)

High Nun - Sister Mary Margaret goes to rehab, is challenged to gunfight by drug dealers.

30 Sycophants Over Tokyo - Col. Jimmy Doolittle discovers that a large portion of his subordinates are ass kissers during bombing raid on Japan.

Catty Shaq - Biopic of Shaquille O’Neal that reveals his penchant for malicious gossip.

Arsenic And Old Lice - Cary Grant tries to get rid of the crabs.

The 39 Steppes - Sergei Eisenstein plagiarizes Hitchcock film and sets it in Russia.

Father Goosed - Cary Grant and Leslie Caron play grab-ass on Pacific island during WWII.

Strategic Hair Command - Former Air Force hairdresser (Jimmy Stewart) called back into service to the great dismay of his wife (June Allyson) who suffers from split ends.

Paint Your Volkswagen - Lee Marvin and Clint Eastwood open Earl Scheib franchise in a small town in the Sierra Nevada.

Eats Of Eden - McDonald’s and Burger King franchisees duel it out in Eden Prairie,MN.

Some Like It Haute - Two chef wannabes try to escape loan sharks who financed their culinary academy classes.

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